Transfers - Gossip Shop: Wet Sham

Eurosport - Thu, 04 Sep 17:45:00 2008

Imagine a world where Paolo Di Canio was in charge of West Ham.

FOOTBALL 2005-2006 Serie A Lazio Di Canio - 0

Forget that touchline 'fight' between Arsene Wenger and Alan Pardew: what we really want to see is Di Canio meting out Paul Alcock-style beats to whinging Weng then saluting the Hammers' extreme element on the way to the changing rooms. Not that GS is advocating fascism.

And what of Croatia boss Slaven Bilic, installed as favourite?

Another favourite of the Upton Park faithful, the earring-sporting Bilic would be another spectacle to behold while throwing curry and beer down your gullets during Match of the Day; much less his rock band on Top of the Pops.

He is a realistic candidate, having admitted that he may never get over the shock of conceding THAT injury-time goal to Turkey in Euro 2008 before losing on penalties.

The other name heavily linked with the job is that of good old 'Arry Redknapp, but all the jellied eels in East London couldn't tempt him back there.

Here you have a man who has built a side that challenges for Europe, a man who is settled in his [reported] £10 million mansion on the south coast, a man who has managed at Upton Park and been sacked; a man who won the FA Cup last season.

Those hacks who predicted Redknapp to West Ham will be kicking themselves if they picked up a copy of The Sun this morning - for there is 'Arry himself, revealing his thoughts on the matter.

"Alan Curbishley may have gone as West Ham boss - but there's no way I'll replace him."

Although it should be noted that he said that BEFORE Carlton Cole pledged his future to the club.

The other ongoing battleground in the war between owners and managers is of course St James', with Dennis Wise crouched in an attack stance and prepared to go all Taxi Driver on Newcastle manager Kevin Keegan.

The silvery-haired nice-guy-wronged Keegan may have cause for concern given Wise's previous, but it seems he has a formidable ally as a tag-team partner: none other than little Mickey Owen.

Owen is apparently leading a players' revolt backing their manager to owner Mike Ashley's door, his chief weapon being a threat to not sign a deal that would see him paid £140,000 every week for years to come. To play football.

Jermain Defoe has puffed out his child-like chest and told the world that he is ready to step into little Mickey's size fives for England.

With a record of five goals in 29 appearances - two against Andorra, two against Trinidad and Tobago - the world would be forgiven for not quaking in its boots, a stance backed by the national side's plummet to 15th in the world rankings. That is one ahead of Scotland. Who said Fabio Capello is not worth £6.5m a year?

Don Fabio faces a mini-revolt himself in the England camp ahead of World Cup qualifiers against Andorra and Croatia - over food.

Many of the players complained of dizziness during the friendly against Czech Republic, something they put down to a lack of nourishment under the new regime.

Italian maestro Capello is reportedly prepared to bow to their demands this week for - we kid you not - pasta.

Back to the managers v owners slug-fest: Everton supremo Bill Kenwright has bemoaned the lack of a billionaire owner to push through plans for Goodison Park and David Moyes's transfer targets.

What is this willingness to whore clubs out to unknown benefactors? It is upsetting the balance of English football: United star Carlos Tevez has even been busy tipping Manchester City as Premier League title contenders. The mind boggles.

Thank God for the conscience-stricken Louis Saha, who offered to freeze his pay packet of £45,000 for every week that he spends injured after joining the Toffees. For some reason Kenwright turned down his once-in-a-lifetime offer.

Over to 'Arry for a final say on who ought to run team affairs:

"I love it at Portsmouth and I've got one big advantage over a lot of Premier League bosses these days: I've got an owner who lets the manager manage."

Jonathan Symcox / Eurosport

Comment 1 - 20 of 20

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  1. north south divide west ham & newcastle what a­ laugh, come on yeovil loyal, you lot dont know the­ meaning

    From ashleighwragg, on Thu 4 Sep 10:23PM

  2. oh no thats di matteo

    From Il Risker, on Thu 4 Sep 6:34PM

  3. hasnt he JUST signed for mk dons or is it my­ immagination?

    From Il Risker, on Thu 4 Sep 6:34PM

  4. mikefrom prague its people like u that make other­ people commit murder..... think before u type s@$t!!

    From sarahandtunde, on Thu 4 Sep 6:10PM

  5. To Wayne......Sam Allardyce & Mick McCarthy

    From chris, on Thu 4 Sep 5:53PM

  6. curbishley had his rights taken away concerning­ signings because he f@%$@d up along with golum­ (magnessun)paying extortionate prices and wages to over­ rated and injury prone players. the board lost faith­ and money during this time. hence the recent­ sales.curbishley cant complain that the board took­ these decisions away from him. although we dont like­ the idea of losing our better players he is to blame­ for his own downfall.he has never had the experience­ working with top players. (ie charlton)and he plays­ boring football. lets hope a return to the football we­ whu fans have grown up on even if it means no trophies.

    From stephen.baxter18, on Thu 4 Sep 5:22PM

  7. DAVID.SMITH6288 I DONT HARRY WILL GO TO WEST HAM THIS­ YEAR NOW HE GOT A CHANCE TO MANAGE IN THE UEFA CUP

    From andycameron98, on Thu 4 Sep 5:15PM

  8. "Don`t know what most West Ham fans think but Alf­ Garnet must be spitting feathers by now, air must be­ royal blue."

    Warren Mitchell (Alf Garnet) was a­ Spurs fan ironicly.

    I feel sorry for Curbishly he is a­ good man in a game full of @#$%

    There are few decent­ people left in the premiership

    Jimmy Bullard, Harry­ Redknapp,Gus Poyet......Erm can you think of any­ others?

    Wayne (spurs)

    From wayne, on Thu 4 Sep 4:17PM

  9. North American Conglomerate GLUGUB buys Western Ham­ United today. The new owner was quoted as saying­ "we is buyin Paul Dickov n' we want Western­ Ham United to be top 20 material" They went on to­ say "we has been approachin Mr Bobby Moore to be­ manager as he is famous in Western Ham but haven't­ got his signature yet"
    Fans that gathered at the­ ground reported that "well at least it's a­ better situation today than it was this time last­ week"

    From Andy, on Thu 4 Sep 3:49PM

  10. Don`t know what most West Ham fans think but Alf Garnet­ must be spitting feathers by now, air must be royal­ blue.

    From plewis696, on Thu 4 Sep 3:44PM

  11. shmilyct2 why don't you f@ck off and die?

    From Nick, on Thu 4 Sep 3:41PM

  12. To brett_sullivan2009 - Paolo Di Canio quote from his­ autobiography: "Perhaps because I am right wing, I­ am fascinated by Mussolini. I think he was a deeply­ misunderstood - basically a very principled, ethical­ individual."

    Mussolini, of course, killed­ political opponents, stripped Jews of their citizenship­ and was allied with Hitler until 1943. Nice­ chap.

    Mussolini's granddaughter, herself a­ far-right politician, described Di Canio's gesture­ as "delightful".

    From early.doors, on Thu 4 Sep 3:14PM

  13. Brett Sullivan, you quote the first two lines of Di­ Canio's reason for giving that salute. Why not the­ third line he gave? Is is because he said "i am a­ fascist, but not a rascist".

    And you say he is­ "in no way fascist/rascist".

    He himself­ admits to it.

    I don't think many people think­ there's much of a difference.

    Why the word­ blindness Brett?

    And you may wish to wonder why Di­ Canio has a Mussolini tattoo as well...

    From paul s, on Thu 4 Sep 3:10PM

  14. Di Canio is an Irriducibili Lazio neo-nazi, just like­ his boy Mihajlović. And he's proud of it.­ When I see him I'll do my best not to try and kill­ him but I'm not making any promises. If I can shoot­ rabbits then I can shoot fascists.

    From bigsim88, on Thu 4 Sep 2:57PM

  15. I'm in the know and what I know is that Bilic will­ be announced as new boss very soon, but wont take up­ thte reigns until after Croaia vs England game next wed

    From bigsim88, on Thu 4 Sep 2:50PM

  16. if you knew what you were on about you would know that­ P0ulo Di Canio was giving a traditional Roman salute to­ the fans and is in no way a­ facist/racist

    Quote
    "I made the Roman salute­ because it's a salute from a comrade to his­ comrades and was meant for my people.

    "With this­ stiff arm I do no want to incite violence or racial­ hatred."

    From Brett, on Thu 4 Sep 2:27PM

  17. Michael Owen should be thankful every day that people­ don't see him for what he is......A greedy­ benchwarmer!!

    No doubt he has ability,but how many­ times does he actually PLAY FOOTBALL.Especially when­ the chips are down for his club.All of a sudden he­ pulls a hamstring,or whatever and he's out for­ another six weeks....still being paid a fortune while­ his teammates take stick 'cause they lose one or­ two games on the trot.Has he ever,EVER played a full­ season in his career?!!!!!

    I'm sick of players­ like him acting like he's owed something by his­ club,when it comes to a new contract,just because of a­ reputation.

    I hope he gets to read this.ANYTHING over­ a grand a week to kick a ball is a FORTUNE.Good job he­ can't use his left too well.He'd bankrupt a­ good club with some of the most loyal and vocal support­ in the country!! And no,I'm not a geordie.

    From jhr881, on Thu 4 Sep 2:14PM

  18. Di Canio and Mancini with Nani continuing in his­ present role would surely make all Hammers fans, happy­ ones....C.O.Y.I.

    From Hammer., on Thu 4 Sep 1:36PM

  19. West Ham already know who the new manager is but, they­ would look really bad if they annonced it today. Saw­ Harry Redknapp today at Chigell underground station­ culd be visiting someone I suppose??

    From Greenjob, on Thu 4 Sep 1:18PM

  20. It's all media bubble. A facist in charge of West­ ham ............ Bring something funny here

    From mikefromprague, on Thu 4 Sep 1:13PM
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