World Cup qual. - England's home discomfort

Eurosport - Fri, 10 Oct 09:17:00 2008

Kazakhstan are ranked 131 in the world and have nobody you've ever heard of. Surely England can't slip up at Wembley on Saturday. Can they?

2007 England Steve McClaren wally with the brolly - 0

Eurosport-Yahoo! attempts to ward off complacency by plumbing the depths of England's murky past to find the worst home performances of all-time.

The conclusion? No matter how mediocre the opposition, England can cock it up big time. Fabio Capello beware.

England's roll of shame

England 0-2 Ireland - Goodison Park, 1949

This was England's first home defeat to anyone outside the UK and set the trend for decades of failure to follow. Walter Winterbottom's men made a dominant start but failed to score, then sat back and got walloped. Con Martin scored the opener, Peter Farrell finished the job five minutes from time.

England 3-6 Hungary - Wembley, 1953

"Look at that little fat chap," said one England player as they lined up for the anthems against the Magyars. "We'll murder this lot." The little fat chap was Ferenc Puskas, and it was he that did the murdering. Puskas scored twice, Nandor Hidegkuti grabbed a hat-trick and England were humbled. Hungary, it turns out, were good.

England 1-1 Poland - Wembley, 1973

Brian Clough never got the England job, but got some revenge when he infamously called Polish keeper Jan Tomaszewski "a clown" before this must-win 1974 World Cup qualifier. The thing about clowns is they have big hands, and Tomaszewski used them to great effect, ensuring England did not qualify.

England 1-2 Scotland - Wembley, 1977

Of all England's home defeats at the Tartan Army (and there have been 18), this is probably the most humiliating. Goals from Gordon McQueen and Kenny Dalglish secured the Home Championship and the visiting fans celebrated by ripping up the pitch and breaking a crossbar - which now resides in Rod Stewart's garden.

England 1-2 Uruguay - Wembley, 1990

Given how Italia '90 went, it is hard to recall the sense of depression that hung over England going into the World Cup. England produced a god-awful performance in their final home pre-tournament friendly against Uruguay. It was so bad it might have caused a riot had Wembley not been less than half full.

England 0-1 Germany - Wembley, 2000

Germany's visit presented England with the perfect chance to give the original Wembley Stadium a rousing send-off, but instead it descended into a soggy farce. Amid torrential rain, Didi Hamann beat David Seaman with a long-range free-kick and Kevin Keegan resigned during his post-match interview. Shambolic.

England 2-2 Macedonia - St Mary's, 2002

If there really are 'no easy games' left in international football, it's only because of the major countries' rank incompetence. David Seaman had a nightmare, England trailed twice and then, having drawn level, spent a futile hour trying and failing to break through a paper-thin Macedonian back line.

England 1-3 Australia - Upton Park, 2003

Nothing hurts like a sporting defeat to the Aussies, particularly when it is a sport at which they are meant to be rubbish. England's capitulation came in humiliating fashion and featured 11 substitutions at half-time when trailing 2-0. Still at least Francis Jeffers got his international career off to a great start with a goal.

England 0-0 Macedonia - Old Trafford, 2006

Ah, this lot again. This was the moment when the nation realised Steve McClaren's appointment might not have been the masterstroke it appeared when England thrashed Greece 4-0 in a meaningless friendly. Even worse than the first Macedonia draw - England never even looked like scoring.

England 2-3 Croatia - Wembley, 2007

So awful for so many reasons. England should have been out already but Russia lost to Israel and gave them a lifeline. Scott Carson replaced David James in an all-too-literal sense as England fell 2-0 behind early on. Having pulled level, McClaren's men drew on fresh reserves of incompetence and lost the game all over again.

Follow live minute-by-minute coverage of England v Kazakhstan and all matches featuring Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and Republic of Ireland on eurosport.yahoo.co.uk!

Alex Chick / Eurosport

Comment 41 - 60 of 100

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  1. Sorry just noticed it the home games your talking about, My Bad!

    From Chris T, on Thu 9 Oct 10:41PM

  2. In the return match in Budapest 1953, Hungary won 7-1 the worst defeat ever for England how come you did not mention that?

    From Chris T, on Thu 9 Oct 10:40PM

  3. In response to #33, you brain dead bint. We lost to Macedonia away from home and playing in 100 degrees heat. What excuse do you have for Englands last 2 games against Macedonia, both matches at home. This is why women shouldnt talk about football.

    From roundboy, on Thu 9 Oct 10:00PM

  4. In response to #44, you are right in some respects but you could have all the world class players you like, if they dont or cant play as a team then you aint gonna win matches. Scotland for example would be really hard pressed to name ANY of there players world class but apart from a blip against Macedonia, Scotland have played better and had better results than England over the past couple of years.

    From roundboy, on Thu 9 Oct 9:52PM

  5. In response to 23, Rooney the finsher. Is this the same Rooney with 4 goals in about as many years for england.

    From Paul T, on Thu 9 Oct 9:26PM

  6. Jean J you look fit

    From Paul T, on Thu 9 Oct 9:24PM

  7. Greece didn't have one world class player and they won the Euro's. It's the attitude of the players that counts not how big there wage packets are.

    From Paul T, on Thu 9 Oct 9:24PM

  8. I YAY TAK CAR A YAR WEE SELF NAY JEAN J. IM AFF.

    From dannysbac, on Thu 9 Oct 9:21PM

  9. SO WHAT HOME NATION HASN'T GOT 10 MURKY LOSSES AT HOME IN THE LAST 60 YEARS? EVEN BRAZIL HAVE. SO WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS ARTICLE. EUROPSPORT ARE TOTAL IDIOTS AND THIS PROVES IT. WHAT A STUPID THING TO SAY. EVERY COUNTRY HAS LOTS OF BAD HOME RESULTS. WHAT IS YOUR POINT REGARDING ENGLAND?

    From POTTER, on Thu 9 Oct 9:08PM

  10. night danny, good chat mate... you made me :) Particularly enjoyed the thing about Karen. lol.

    From Paul T, on Thu 9 Oct 9:07PM

  11. Well if over the last 60 years those are the only, or worst, embarrasments for England, then, "Hey, thanks haven't been that bad afterall."

    Only 10 Embarrassing defeats at home in 60 years. I will challenge you to name any other country that has not had at least 10 embarrassing losses at home in the past 60 years. I promise you faithfully, Brazil have, I don't have to list them, just check the internet. Same for Germany, Italy, Argentina etc etc etc etc and any other nation who claim to be amongst the best in the world.

    I don't have to mention Spain, Portugal etc just because Spain finally won something, lets not forget the murky losses of the past 60 years. Guess, based on your analysis, England have been pretty good compared to most. Only 10 murky losses in the last 60 years. GO ENGLAND, MAYBE YOU EVEN HAVE THE BEST HOME RECORD IN WORLD FOOTBALL?

    From POTTER, on Thu 9 Oct 9:05PM

  12. Everything happens on the day, its not the fact that the england team carn't win its the fact that the england team has always been jumbled and never stuck to a proper first team and obviously all the players play for different clubs.There is no reason why england carn't win the world cup and should be thrashing teams like Kazakhstan, Belarus and Andora, its always been the fact that teams are picked where certain players carn't play together.Now that a New face in the england side such as theo walcott, its not his responsability to rescue england, it was a great hat trick in croatia but england fans need to leave him alone, too much expectation is expected from the kid,Fabio is a good coach and has had experence in his time with coaching such as real madrid and there one of the best teams in europe, he picks the team but its our responsability to support capellos decision even if it means leaving the likes of michael owen out so england at least get to south africa not to be dumped out like euro 2008

    From garydeanmay, on Thu 9 Oct 8:44PM

  13. IM AFF TAY BED CAS I WAS OOUT AL NEET SHAGGIN STUFF AND I FACKN KNECKERED NAY.

    From dannysbac, on Thu 9 Oct 8:38PM

  14. True post #46... but you could argue that World Class involves players that perform at the highest level for club AND country. How many of those 6 would make it on your list with this in mind?

    From Paul T, on Thu 9 Oct 8:35PM

  15. WAT DAD YAY SAY I WAS SAME SART A LACK NEST MANSTER? I'LL HAY YAY KNOW THAT I WAS SAT APAN BY THE LACK NEST MANSTER CAMIN HOME FRAY THE PUB WAN NEET AN I GAY HIM A GUD BETTING. HES NAT SO TIGHT NAY.

    From dannysbac, on Thu 9 Oct 8:34PM

  16. "humm a strange thing is the England team we havent got the players anymore which is a shame. England have 3 world class players and thats where the problem lies never mind we can be happy when we get a lucky win or 2"

    Joe Cole
    Wayne Rooney
    Frank Lampard
    Steven Gerrard
    Rio Ferdinand
    John Terry
    Thats 6 of the top of my head

    From ysm92, on Thu 9 Oct 8:25PM

  17. You's havin a convo with yaself ohhhhh ... craziest thing I eva seen since the lockness monstaaa

    From Paul T, on Thu 9 Oct 8:19PM

  18. In response to submission 38, arguably England didn't have more than 3 world class players when they won the World Cup in 1966: Banks, Moore and Bobby Charlton. Jimmy Greaves was world class but couldn't get in the team!

    Perhaps to do well in today's international competitions, you do need more world class players than 3 but it would be interesting to analyse other international teams that have been doing well to determine just how many of their players are really world class.

    From ROY R, on Thu 9 Oct 8:17PM

  19. WHO ELSE WANTS SAME. WHOS THAT BYE THAT SAID I WERNAY FROM SCOATLAND IM A SCOAT THRAY AND THRAY SA DINNY YAY BE SO CHEEKY OR I'LL BET YAY ASWELL. AM A RAN GARS FAN SAY WHATCH WHAT YAR SAYIN WEE LAD.

    From dannysbac, on Thu 9 Oct 8:15PM

  20. lol... dannysbac. YOu ain't even scottish are yay? You tricky wanna Scoats are funny tho ;)

    From Paul T, on Thu 9 Oct 8:03PM
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