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Gossip is not merely a trivial diversion from the soul-crushing drudgery of everyday life: it is fundamental to human social and psychological well-being.

When you feverishly scan our pages every morning for Gossip Shop, you are doing much more than searching for your daily fix of transfer rumour and chit-chat from around the globe.

In fact, you are stimulating production of endorphins in your over-worked brain; relieving stress, seeking a return to more natural communication patterns from simpler times.

Reading GS is the human equivalent of grooming among primates.

Every time you Post a message, you are meticulously picking out an ectoparasite from deep in a fellow reader's skin. Every time you click on the Thumbs Up button, you are lovingly massaging GS's shoulders and stroking his head. Every time you Email this story, you are gently scratching dead skin and insects from your Yahoo! buddy's matted fur.

So Gossip Shop thanks you. And, though transfer tittle-tattle is a bit thin on the ground this post-international morning, here's your daily fix of up a bit... down a bit... no, left... left... ooooooh, yeah, right there... right there.

Sift out the international fall-out from today's back pages and you'll find a bit of a 3-2-1 situation going on, except without the politically-incorrect stylings of nylon-suited former Butlins Redcoat Ted Rogers.

Arsenal are featured in a triple-bill of speculation and hearsay; Blackburn Rovers are featured twice; and Tottenham Hotspur just once.

Arsenal appear to be considering their legal options following the injury to Theo Walcott whilst on England duty. The forward's dislocated right shoulder could require an eight-week recuperation following an operation (Daily Mail), although the Independent suggest a specialist will decide this week whether Theo actually needs to go under the knife or not.

The Gunners are mulling over whether they should pursue compensation from the FA over the injury. The figure - based on Walcott's wages for the time he is out - would be around £200,000, some way short of the £10 million Newcastle United received after Michael Owen suffered knee ligament damage while on England duty at the World Cup in 2006.

Meanwhile, the Daily Mirror report that Arsenal and Aston Villa are set to compete for the £8m signature of Standard Liege playmaker Steven Defour. What's with the sudden clamour for Belgian midfielders? If they were all as good as people think, wouldn't Belgium be higher than 55th in the FIFA rankings?

And Arsenal's final mention comes with the news that they could be interested in a January move for another Belgian, veteran defender Daniel van Buyten (pictured) - who appears very open to a move from current club Bayern Munich.

"Arsenal are a very attractive club," said van Buyten, who has played in England before with Manchester City back in 2004. "That goes without saying. When we reach the mid-season break I will take stock of my situation at Bayern. There is still time for me to make a decision."

The giant centre-back has barely featured in the Bundesliga this season, a factor sure to influence his thinking.

Up north to Blackburn, where not even a likening to Manchester United legend Eric Cantona appears to be enough to keep Roque Santa Cruz at the club - the striker is reportedly still "keen" to leave to join his former Rovers boss Mark Hughes at Manchester City in January.

Blackburn are also keen to jump aboard the Egyptian bandwagon following the raving success of striker Amir Zaki down the road at Wigan. Paul Ince has taken right-winger Ahmed Al-Mohammadi on trial from ENPPI with a view to signing him in January as the club look to fill the literally-tiny-but-metaphorically-enormous boots of David Bentley.

And finally, Tottenham manager Harry Redknapp appears to have realised what everyone else has known for the last three months - that goalkeeper Heurelho Gomes is about as much use as a pair of breasts on a bull.

Redknapp will choose between West Ham's Robert Green or a loan deal for Manchester United's Ben Foster in January.

Alex Sharratt / Eurosport