Owais Shah's Test career: March 18, 2006 to March 10, 2009 - RIP.

Shah's six-match foray into the five-day international format came to a terminal end when he was left out of the squad for the first Test against West Indies.

Whilst you get the feeling that we'll be seeing Ian Bell sometime again in the Test arena, Cowers sees nothing but a few one-day and Twenty20 bashes in England colours for Shah.

He can now take his place at the round table of Test cricket's great under achievers accompanied by Mark Ramprakash, Graeme Hick, John Crawley, Vinod Kambli and Michael Bevan.

With over 13,000

Cow Corner is giddy as an eight-year-old on Christmas Eve.

No, it's not because it has scored tickets to the Sex and the City movie, but because England start their international summer tomorrow in the first Test against New Zealand.

What it means for Cow Corner is that it can abandon its present "scan the papers frantically for something interesting to write about" set-up, and take on a dynamic live format instead.

Cowers will be strapping on its several-sizes-too-big pads, slipping a 'youth' box into its borrowed jockstrap, shunning a helmet for its Richie Richardson-style floppy hat and

17.22 - THAT'S IT FOR THE DAY! ALL OVER! The umpires have had enough. They want to get back to the hotel in time to watch whatever guff programme Ant and Dec are currently sapping the life out of.

Thanks for joining me. Make sure you come back tomorrow...Cowers is going to be hungover and angry... 

17.14 - The rain has got harder. Seriously, get off the computer. Go have a shower, pour yourself a Captain Morgan's, do your hair, put some Queen on the stereo. Tonight is going to be your night. You own tonight. You'e the man. No-one can touch you. No-one can hurt you. You dig?

16.46 - There is

Yorkshire do not have a County Championship game this week which gives Tim Bresnan some more valuable time to stick pins in his Ryan Sidebottom voodoo doll.

Bresnan was the fall guy when England named their 15-man squad for the £11.5m Stanford Super Series in the Caribbean with Sidebottom guaranteed a yacht, sorry a place, as long as he proves his fitness after injury.

With about £150,000 guaranteed for the four blokes who don't even make the final XI, you wouldn't blame Bresnan on getting some hired goons to "do" Ryan. We're not encouraging violence - merely asking Ryan to carry an Ikea

Cricket is going through an era of unparalleled record-breaking. Cowers looks at some of the records that are sure to go soon and some others that may stand the test of time.

Cricket is a sport in love with statistics and records - but which ones will last, and which will be surpassed?

1. HIGHEST TEST CAREER AVERAGE: 6996 runs at 99.94

Don Bradman (pictured), Australia

Bradman's end-of-career average is the stuff of legend; a figure as close to perfection as is possible for a human being. Statistician Charles Davis, in his book 'The Best of the Best', used Bradman's career figures to argue

You know that cricket is the new rock 'n' roll when an England player describes sex as "on tap", a term previously applied only to John Smith's and - on special occasions - Chicken Tikka Masala.

Skunk-haired Lothario Kevin Pietersen, who is married to one-time pop queen Jessica Taylor, claims that scoring a century is better than sex on the basis that:

"Centuries don't come around very often, whereas sex is on tap, isn't it?"

But is it really true that carnal encounters occur more frequently than scoring a ton?

Well, maybe for the likes of KP and Cow Corner (although in the latter's case it is

21:40 - ENG 243 ALL OUT! (48.2 overs) WEST INDIES LEVEL THE SERIES! Anderson is clean bowled going for an almighty haymaker over midwicket and England's challenge is over. West Indies win by 21 runs to level the series. The third ODI is in Bridgetown, Barbados on Friday and can you follow the action right here. Cow is very much looking forward to it.

Scorecard
Match gallery

21:35 - ENG 241-9 (48 overs) England have the merest glimmer of hope. Anderson squeezes one away to the point boundary, then survives an LBW shout to grab a quick single. England need 24 RUNS FROM 12 BALLS. It's been done. 

6.38PM - SA 101-3 (29 overs) - Ashwell Prince works both bowlers off his pads for boundaries and that's stumps after an eventful day. Join us tomorrow for more.

SCORECARD | MATCH GALLERY     

6.15PM - SA 82-3 (25 overs) - WICKET! More success for England late in the day as Kallis chops Anderson onto his stumps. Then drama as Amla gets a leading edge off Flintoff and Vaughan takes a diving "catch" at mid-off. The batsman is three quarters of the way towards the pavilion before the outraged visiting dressing room send him back. After a lengthy review, third umpire Richard Kettleborough says