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    Early Doors

    Adebayor’s dilemma

    Emmanuel Adebayor is in a bit of a pickle. He
    plays for Manchester
    City against Arsenal
    tomorrow and is going to be given a torrid time by the visiting fans.

    Gooners were delighted when Adebayor left
    the club, after the striker was deemed to have stopped trying last season -
    notably during the Champions League semi-final against Manchester United.

    After joining City he has started
    scoring goals again - and it has been said he has a point to prove when
    Arsenal visit.

    Normally, scoring a goal is the right way
    to prove a point, but it depends on what exactly that point is.

    If Adebayor finds the net tomorrow he will
    have scored in four consecutive games, yet paradoxically he will have proved
    the Gooners right - that he was useless last season because he was not trying.

    If he wants to win the argument, Adebayor
    should play like a drain - thereby proving that he is just not very good, and
    capable of playing just as badly for Manchester
    City as he did for
    Arsenal. That'll show them.

    - -
    -

    When
    referee Alberto Undiano Mallenco blew the final whistle on Wednesday
    night to confirm England's qualification for the World Cup, he might as well have been ringing an enormous cash register.

    The World Cup can
    mean big money for the host country, all the more so if England are involved.

    It was a wise man who
    called his stock broker on Thursday morning and bought shares in Castle Lager, Biltong
    and Acme Plastic Breasts.

    With thousands of fans
    planning to make the trip to South
    Africa, it should be like shooting fish in a
    barrel for the country's leading
    travel agencies.

    Cue a press release from Thomas Cook
    advertising package holidays including flights, accommodation and World Cup
    tickets. It is a lazy traveller's
    dream.

    A lazy and fabulously rich traveller.
    Because the prices are enough to make even the most well-off football fan want
    to spend their summer staycationing at a Prestatyn caravan park.

    And if Rio Ferdinand doesn't shake off his back injury, he could make it two
    years on the trot
    driving a go-kart around Presthaven Sands.

    If you want to see just one England game,
    Thomas Cook plan to relieve you of £2,499 for five nights'
    accommodation and a ticket in the nosebleed seats.

    Two games will cost you £3,650, while
    £4,150 gets you three matches along with 17 nights in a three star hotel in the
    Sandton district of Johannesburg, whose main claim to fame is hosting the 2008
    Miss World contest.

    Inevitably, Danny Talbot, managing director at Thomas
    Cook Sport, said: "We're
    anticipating that demand for our packages will be very
    high."

    As well as pricing the ubiquitous and yet somewhat mysterious 'ordinary fan' well out of the equation, it all seems a bit unnecessary.

    For the price of the cheapest package, you
    could get to Venice
    and back on the Orient Express
    , or buy a Bang and Olufsen home entertainment
    system so massive it is more realistic than attending matches in person.

    - - -

    Premier League team news: Rio
    ready for action

    Fantasy Premier League: Choose 'em or lose 'em?

    Early Doors

    Early Doors began life as a daily vehicle for mocking Rafa Benitez - and as such represented something a prototype for the modern internet. It has now evolved into a must-read morning feature from our team of football writers. Serious or silly, penetrating or puerile, Early Doors has always got something to say on the big issues. And there's still a fair amount of Rafa mockery.

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