If you thought the Olympics was little more than a glorified version of Le Tournoi, consult the bruised shins of Craig Bellamy and Joe Allen for evidence to the contrary.

None of the signs pointed to it, but last night's Great Britain versus Senegal match actually provided a compelling spectacle, even if the performance and result confirmed that Britain simply aren't that good.

Old Trafford had been neutered for the occasion - the venue adorned with hot pink Olympic logos, with any sign of non-official sponsors taped over in comically officious fashion.

Where the Theatre of Dreams usually

The bad news for Chelsea's rivals is that Roman Abramovich does not think everything is OK. His team's Champions League success has not fooled him.

Nor, having got his hands on the one piece of silverware he coveted most, has his desire to buy success waned.

Chelsea were a total shambles last season. Hopeless and miserable under Andre Villas-Boas, then hopeless and cheerful under Roberto Di Matteo.

That they managed to win the Champions League is a sporting mystery great enough to rival Carlton Palmer's 18 England caps or the continued existence of Alan Green.

After the celebrations,

Early Doors is in mourning today following the sad news of the retirement of Italy and AC Milan striker Filippo Inzaghi.

After a World Cup, two Champions Leagues, three league titles, 156 goals in Serie A and another 70 in Europe, the man they call Super Pippo has decided to call it a day at the grand old age of 38.

To mark the solemn occasion in appropriate fashion, ED will spend the day dressed head-to-toe in black, wailing and sobbing uncontrollably, all the while clinging on for dear life to an offside flag.

While great contemporaries such as Alessandro Del Piero and Raul continue to

After his appointment early in the summer, having two quality signings land on his lap and cutting the ribbon on a brand new training complex, Andre Villas-Boas has set about negotiating his first major task as Tottenham Hotspur's head coach.

How the Portuguese handles Luka Modric's desire to leave the club in the wake of interest from Real Madrid will go a long way to defining how Spurs fans compare him to previous incumbent Harry Redknapp — apart from addressing by means other than through a car window, of course.

With more than a few lingering doubts about his credentials following his

Pick up a newspaper today and you'll notice something refreshingly un-footbally about it.

The beaming, sideburned features of Tour de France winner Bradley Wiggins will almost certainly adorn the front.

Further back, you'll find more superb facial hair from Hashim Amla, who struck a glorious triple hundred for South Africa at The Oval.

There's The Open, which saw one of its most dramatic finishes ever after Adam Scott did what Aussies do best and choked away a four shot lead with four to play.

And you will also find news of a Fernando Alonso masterclass - the Spaniard drove his car slightly

When it was announced on Thursday that Tottenham captain Ledley King was retiring at just 31 years of age, the news was not met shock but with sad sense of resignation.

Like the passing of an old relative, Spurs fans have had a long time to come to terms with the realisation that their star centre-back would not be with them forever.

King was the most gifted English defender of his generation, with an elegant grace and exceptional reading of the game that put most of his contemporaries to shame. It is just a shame that his knees were not similarly reliable.

In a 14-year career, King made just

We love to laugh at Americans.

Maybe it's their burger-scoffing obesity crisis, their penchant for invading countries that can't possibly defend themselves or their skyrocketing level of gun crime.

They're just so different from us, aren't they?

Well, no.

And another area where the UK rivals the States is in our ignorance of each other's sporting landscape.

We delight in poking fun at American commentary, whether real or not ('He top-bodies the sphere into the score bag!'), while simultaneously ignoring our own bone-headedness.

In fact, we are worse than the Americans. Rather than making

He's either a deadly goalscorer and serial winner or an self-aggrandising myth.

These are the two schools of thought when it comes to Zlatan Ibrahimovic, with almost no middle ground.

Your opinion simply depends on whether you actually pay attention to football matches, or form knee-jerk opinions based on a tiny sample size when Clive Tyldesley is commentating.

It depends whether you rate a player who finished top of the league eight seasons in a row with five clubs.

Whether you rate a player who has scored 20-plus goals each of the last five seasons (35 last term for Milan).

Whether you rate