Fernando Torres: little more than an internet hoax?Early Doors was highly amused to see Bayern Munich fall victim to what was inevitably, and rightly, described as a 'PR fail' yesterday.
The German giants took to their official website to announce they were ready to confirm the signing of a "spectacular name", sending Twitter into a frenzy and leading all and sundry to speculate about which world star would be making their way to the Allianz Arena.
Of course, no such signing materialised, as it transpired it was all a ruse to launch a new app, with fans logging on to a live stream on Facebook to discover that the new arrival was in fact themselves. Yes, you read that right.
"Dear fans, you probably already noticed, that we did not sign a new player," a statement on Bayern Munich's Facebook page read. "This app is for our fans to show the importance of you for our club."
Predictably, the gaffe left Bayern fans absolutely furious with their club for giving them a bum steer, and inspired ED's favourite ever user comment.
"You stupid idiots! I've sacrificed my lunch break for a bad joke," wrote one Bunyamin Divarci. "Those responsible must feel the consequences."
Strangely, general manager Christian Nerlinger remains in a job despite the detrimental impact his stunt had on Bunyamin's lunch break.
But ED felt the fury of Bayern fans was probably misplaced. After all, this kind of thing has happened before: a similar scenario occurred with a certain Fernando Torres last season.
Don't we all remember the day when Chelsea announced they had paid £50 million for a world-class striker, a player who would tilt the balance firmly in their favour?
But we were all duped, like those Bayern fans.
It turned out, of course, that Chelsea had in fact invested rather heavily in a hoax.
Twelve months and three Premier League goals on from that point, the man we previously knew as Fernando Torres has, like Bayern's new signing, become little more than a social media joke.
When Tim Howard scored for Everton with his fluky shot, for instance, people were falling over themselves to highlight the fact he had now scored more league goals than the Spaniard in 2012, and just one less than him all season.
His seminal miss against Manchester United promptly went viral, as the Spain striker became the butt of yet more jokes.
Basically, what ED is saying is that Torres is no longer a Premier League striker - he is an internet meme.
Like one of those lolcats who quizzically ask "I can has cheeseburgerz?" Torres has now become little more than an online reference point.
Like Gazza, his fishing rod, cans of lager and a packet of processed chicken, he is now a punch line.
This is what one of the world's finest forwards has been reduced to.
Any discussion of misfiring strikers is incomplete without the inclusion of his name; any football joke redundant without him featuring.
However, at least Bayern Munich can console themselves that their 'new striker' didn't cost £50 million.
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On a more serious note, Torres will be in action this weekend as the FA Cup fourth round gets underway. We are supposed to get all nostalgic and sentimental about the competition of course, but this weekend in particular has a rather different edge to it.
Chelsea and QPR released a joint statement ahead of their meeting given that John Terry and Anton Ferdinand are likely to face each other on the pitch for the first time since the Chelsea captain was charged with racially abusing his opponent in October.
Meanwhile, Patrice Evra will be turning out at Anfield for the first time since he was ludicrously painted as the villain of a piece that eventually saw Luis Suarez banned for eight matches for racially abusing the France defender.
We can but hope that those fans in attendance at both FA Cup ties behave responsibly and respectfully.
As Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard said yesterday: "We do all have a responsibility - we all have a responsibility to ensure that this game is remembered for the football.
"Liverpool and Man United is a massive rivalry and, of course, there is going to be stuff in the papers and banter between fans. But it would be fantastic if, after the weekend, it is remembered for being a top game - and obviously, from our point of view, a Liverpool win.
"We don't want any front page stories from this game, or any stories besides a football match between two top sides and may the best team win."
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QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I'm a phenomenon." - Short and straight to the point from Sir Alex Ferguson.
FOREIGN VIEW: "Hey, some guy you are. Why do you just love always f****** up the professionals?" - The Mirror details how Jose Mourinho had a pop at referee Fernando Teixeira - according to 'bystanders' at least - in the car park at Camp Nou following Real Madrid's Copa del Rey defeat.
COMING UP: We reveal the result of our goal of the week poll, while Jim White and Paul Parker file their latest columns ahead of the weekend. Tonight sees the start of the FA Cup fourth round with Watford taking on Tottenham at 7.45pm and Everton hosting Fulham at 8pm.
The African Cup of Nations also continues with Niger taking on Tunisia at 4pm and Gabon facing Morocco at 7pm.
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