Well, for 85 minutes the best club competition in the world was a whole lot of nothing.
Both Liverpool and Chelsea looked set for drab goalless draws in the Champions League, the Blues in a game of quite breathtaking awfulness.
Then it all changed - at least it did at Anfield. First Dirk Kuyt saw his keeper-bound effort take a deflection over Julio Cesar, then Steven Gerrard slammed home the first 'wondergoal' to bounce three times before reaching its target.
Still, Liverpool deserved their win, producing a performance that, in equal measures, made you marvel at their ability to deliver when the chips are down, and shake your head in disbelief at how rubbish they are the rest of the time.
If Benitez could only brainwash his players into thinking they were playing in Europe every week, they wouldn't have a problem.
Former Everton man Marco Materazzi marked his return to Merseyside in familiar fashion.
The man with the "headbutt me" sign on his chest was sent off three times during his one season with the Toffees, completing a remarkable treble of seeing red in the Premiership, FA Cup and League Cup - each coming at Goodison Park.
A mile across Stanley Park, he added the Champions League to the list picking up two bookings - a little harshly - for fouls on Fernando Torres.
Materazzi's name is just a small Italian spelling mistake away from translating as "Mark Mattresses" - which is nowhere near as exotic-sounding.
England coach Fabian Hat must also be pleased he was born in a boot-shaped country. And you might understand why Milan's third keeper Valerio Fiori has only played twice in eight years when you realise his 'English' name is Valerie Flowers. And the less time spent trying to translate Kaka's name the better.
Flowers could be lining up at the Emirates tonight after Dida injured himself sitting on the bench at Parma on Saturday, while with former Leicester City ace Zeljko Kalac is carrying a dislocated finger (not literally, one hopes).
It's déjà vu all over again as Premier League crisis club Arsenal (recent form: LWWWW) take on a bunch of savvy but ultimately brittle Milanese.
Although this evening's games are on satellite, anyone pining for foul-mouthed, badly-behaved, overpaid louts on terrestrial television can tune into the Brit Awards.
The music industry is basically football with a less stringent drug-testing regime - and anyone hoping to see the Arsenal game can just pretend the superannuated likes of Ozzy Osbourne and Paul McCartney are Milan players.
Now he has got time on his hands, Fidel Castro might also consider trying out for a place in the Milan back four.
The rossoneri need a new elder statesman in defence now that 41-year-old Alessandro Costacurta has finally retired and with Paolo Maldini set to bow out at the end of the season.
It was surprising to see somebody with Castro's political acumen and flair for the dramatic bungle his exit so badly.
When you have been in power for 49 years, why would you announce you were stepping down on a day when you are fighting for news coverage with one of the biggest stories for decades?
Like Aldous Huxley's death on the same day JFK was shot, Castro's retirement will be forgotten, overshadowed by more significant events.
February 19th 2008 will simply be remembered as: "The day Chris Coleman joined Coventry".
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I've been training every day for 20 years, so I should be ready. I've probably trained more than any other goalkeeper." Milan third-string keeper Valerie Flowers prepares for action against Arsenal.
FOREIGN VIEW: Rafa Benitez must wish he had a chairman like Inter's Massimo Moratti, who praised his players after their 2-0 capitulation at Anfield, saying: "You are all heroes."
DEBATE OF THE DAY: Further to yesterday's unprovoked McClaren-bashing, simondenham adds the following: "In every single game in charge Steve McClaren came undone when he needed to make changes during the game, and why? - The back page of the Sun hadn't been printed at that point."
Meanwhile a couple of pedants - akilesh_radhakrishnan and alihatefi - quite rightly point out that Millwall played the 2004 Cup final in Cardiff, not Wembley.
COMING UP: Full coverage of four more Champions League matches tonight - including Arsenal v Milan, Lyon v Manchester United and Celtic v Barcelona.
FOOL SETTING BACK THE CAUSE OF THE IRISH OF THE DAY: Madcap Irishman Colin Carroll, part-time sumo "flyweight" and a world champion in elephant polo, has unveiled plans to launch the "Paddy Olympics."
"We would have the old favourites like bathtub races, backwards running and the egg-and-spoon 100 metres," Carroll said.
"We may look into the possibility of using the whip in the bathtub races. Instead of discus throwing there would be mobile phone throwing.
"For the relays we could have mixed teams -- two humans and two dogs. Animals are good."
He added: "We may even be in time to host the first Paddy Olympics prior to Beijing. Dope testing would imply an entirely different thing of course."