Newcastle say they have not sacked Kevin Keegan. The League Managers' Association say Keegan has not quit.
But nobody can confirm whether he is actually going to turn up to work today.
Today's Sun claims Keegan's beef with the club stems from an attempt by owner Mike Ashley to sell Michael Owen and Joey Barton on transfer deadline day.
Already peed off at not being able to spend the £12m proceeds from James Milner's sale, Keegan, according to a St James' Park mole, "hit the roof" when it became apparent his two biggest hate figures could be flogged (in Barton's case, a good flogging when he was a boy might have done the trick).
A club statement claimed Keegan was "extremely important" to the club - only because he lends the thinnest veneer of credibility to Ashley's beleaguered regime.
If Newcastle really wanted Keegan to stay, would they really have allowed an entire afternoon of... well, not even speculation. Just a widespread assumption that King Kev had gone. Again.
Keegan's advisors are reportedly lining up an £8m compensation claim and are ready to accuse the Toon of constructive dismissal.
Ashley, meanwhile, is just banking on the fact that Keegan rarely goes more than six weeks without walking away a club.
Keegan complained in 1992 that life at St James' was "not like it said in the brochure" before being persuaded to stay.
ED doesn't know what literature Ashley gave him at the start of his second tenure, but if it was anything like the average package holiday brochure, it was probably quite accurate.
No control over your activities, blazing rows with a beer-swilling fatso, lots of unknown Spaniards milling around, and daily sightings of Dennis Wise and Barton. Sounds like a standard fortnight on the Costa del Concrete.
What remains is a Mexican standoff. Keegan doesn't want to be there and Ashley doesn't want him there. But neither man will pull the trigger for fear of losing millions of pounds.
Early Doors fully expects Wise to pop up, unannounced, from behind the saloon bar and shoot them both.
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The drama allowed Early Doors to invent a new drinking game. The rules are simple.
Every time Sky Sports News run that clip of Mike Ashley downing a pint of lager, you have to down a pint of lager.
Early Doors lasted all of nine minutes before losing consciousness.
Monday could also prove to have been a big day in the career of Sky reporter David Craig. As the news of Keegan's impending dismissal broke, he gathered a group of stray Geordies, summoned all his self-importance and prattled on without divulging any actual facts.
One thing was certain: Craig had planted himself firmly in the "he's already been sacked" camp although he never really said why. Anyway, it was done. Keegan was out and the fans were furious.
As the afternoon wore on and no announcement came, Craig's expression slowly transformed from 'Successful newshound breaking story' to 'Newshound who knows he has massively overplayed his hand and now genuinely fears for his job'.
If Keegan lasts another 24 hours in employment, Craig may not be so lucky.
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WHY JIMMY BULLARD IS GREAT FOR ENGLAND:
Joe Cole, September 2006: "I have been pulling my hair out trying to ensure I get fully fit again and staying at the training ground until five pm every day."
Jimmy Bullard, September 2008: "I was a painter and decorator with my dad at Gravesend. I did that for three years alongside playing non-league football...To play football and have a seven o'clock to seven o'clock job is hard."
QUOTE OF THE DAY: Dr Sulaiman Al-Fahim, Early Doors loves you already: "[Cristiano] Ronaldo has said he wants to play for the biggest club in the world, so we will see in January if he is serious. Real Madrid were estimating his value at $160 million (£88m) but for a player like that, to actually get him, will cost a lot more, I would think $240m (£134m). But why not? We are going to be the biggest club in the world, bigger than both Real Madrid and Manchester United."
TYPO OF THE DAY: Early Doors might not be immune to the odd slip-up, but it would certainly check its spelling before erecting a large banner that proclaimed: "KEEGAN GOES BOYCOUTT THE CLUB!!"
FOREIGN VIEW: "Madrid reject a blank cheque for Van Nistelrooy!" - Marca reacts with horror to the goings-on at Manchester City, who reportedly asked Real to name their price for Ruud on deadline day.
TALKING POINT: davewhitt_2002 injects an unwelcome dose of reality into the City situation: "While Robinho is a 'transfer coup' is it really a great signing for Man City? If you ask me Robinho is not going to like playing on a cold winter's night in Manchester and Mark Hughes is going to have his work cut out trying to get the best out of him."
As for the search for a Robinho Chelsea shirt - yes, ED knows it could buy a blank one and get the name printed, but that's not the point.
One Brian White claims he has the genuine article, but adds: "Like everything in footie, it'll cost you."
Meanwhile, ED could be jacking in the day job if its man in Burkina Faso comes good on his offer of $4.6m from a "deceased account". He seems genuine, but makes a lot of basic spelling mistakes for a multi-millionaire.
Any more offers of untold riches? Send them to email@example.com.
Today - What on earth is going on at Newcastle? Do you sympathise with Kevin Keegan, or is it right to take responsibility away from a man who once said: "You get bunches of players like you do bananas...though that is a bad comparison."