Fabio Capello's public appearance at Aston Villa's game against Manchester United had the entire nation falling over itself to kiss up to its exotic new guest.
The BBC acted like an enthusiastic couple running a B&B, trying just a little too hard to make sure their foreign guest enjoyed his fry-up.
"He'll never have seen anything like this!"
"Strap yourself in, Fabio, it's going to be a heck of a ride!"
Let us leave aside the fact that Capello has not only seen English sides before, he has actually played against them. In any case, he was treated to a black pudding of a game; full-blooded but lacking in any real substance.
Villa started with six Englishmen but, continuing this lame cooked breakfast analogy, they were equivalent of a burnt fried egg, supermarket value beans, a manky cooked tomato, shrivelled mushrooms, a fat-soaked fritter and a cold sausage.
At least Capello was treated to a couple of succulent rashers of Rooney late on. The chunky-thighed scamp created and scored a goal, showing Capello that if he is in the business of dropping big-time Charlies, he should look in the direction of Fat Frank and Stevie G.
Fabio will no doubt field questions on the weekend's stodgy fare during a press conference held to mark him officially starting work as England boss today.
The Italian still has 10 days to make good his promise of proficient English within a month, but today presents an opportunity to gauge his progress by talking loudly and slowly at him while including as many idioms as possible.
"THE GAME - IT WAS YOUR CUP OF TEA? BRASS MONKEYS, NO? WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT WAS A PILE OF EARTHA?"
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If Early Doors hadn't lost its house backing Rhydian to win X-Factor, it would be placing it on one of the Big Four winning the FA Cup for the 13th straight year.
OK, you can only get odds of 3/1 on, but those odds still look tempting in light of the demise of a host of half-decent teams.
It used to be that clubs outside the title race but safe from the drop were perennial contenders, able to slack off the league and focus on the Cup.
But not since Everton in 1995 has such a team prevailed. Given their performances at the weekend, it seems the Premier League's middle class would rather concentrate on securing a UEFA Cup trip to Metalist Kharkiv.
Everton - out; Villa - out; Blackburn - out; Spurs - held by a team that by their own admission didn't give "two s**ts"; Newcastle - battered 0-0 by Stoke.
Not to mention the demise of Birmingham, Bolton and Sunderland, who at least have the excuse of a relegation battle to occupy them.
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Sam Allardyce had everything but the umbrella for his side's escape against Stoke.
It is widely believed that he would have been sacked had Newcastle lost, and there was more than a whiff of Steve McClaren about him as he stood in the rain, watching his stars do their best to lose to a side with less talent but greater motivation.
It may be universally accepted that Newcastle's season has been a disaster, but the facts suggest otherwise.
Martin O'Neill took on a comparable job at Aston Villa, and at this stage of his first season had accumulated 25 points. Allardyce's Newcastle have 26.
Big Sam clearly has more chance of winning Miss Tyneside than of getting the "three to five years" he claims he needs to sort things out at St James's, but a little patience from Mike Ashley and Chris Mort might not go amiss.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEKEND: "We are all going out to a Cannock nightclub which has televisions inside and I can point to the TV when Match of the Day comes on and say 'Look, there's me on the box!' That's not a bad line, is it?" Chasetown's Ben Steane on the glamour of the FA Cup.
FOREIGN VIEW: Milan are the favourites to sign Didier Drogba after the striker reiterated his desire to leave Chelsea at the end of the season.
COMING UP: We have a full review of all the weekend's action, including winners and losers and an FA Cup Team of the Week special.