It's the most alarming headline since The Sun's classic "Radioactive 'paedo' on the run" from last February.
"Gaddafi wants to buy Pompey" screams this morning's Mirror, trumpeting it as "the headline you never thought you'd read!". No kidding.
In case you are wondering, it is not Colonel Muammar Gaddafi we are talking about, but his son, Saadi.
The report claims that Saadi has held talks with representatives of this week's Fratton Park owner, Ali al-Faraj.
That ubiquitous font of all knowledge, the club source, told the paper: "Colonel Gaddafi's son Saadi first expressed an interest in taking over from Al Faraj at the end of last year.
"That has gathered pace since the Revenue issued their winding-up order and the deal is 95 per cent done.
"Al Faraj is keen to sell because he knows he cannot afford to finance the debts and does not want his reputation in the Middle East to suffer by presiding over a club that goes bankrupt.
"Saadi is a big football fan and loves the thought of owning a Premier League team."
This is not the first time the Gaddafi's have reportedly tried to get involved in English football. In 2004 Crystal Palace owner Simon Jordan revealed that they were interested in taking over at Selhurst Park. That might help give Palace players some perspective next time their wages are late.
He may be the son of a notorious dictator and despot, but by an amazing coincidence Saadi managed to captain both the Libya national team and hometown club Al Ahly Tripoli during an unorthodox football career.
He then made a move over the Mediterranean to Italy, where he took up a 7.5 per cent stake in Juventus, before stepping down from the club's board in order to make just two appearances in a four-year spell that took him from Perugia to Sampdoria via Udinese.
If there is a grain of truth in this story, then Pompey fans have yet another reason to worry once the Premier League lift the transfer embargo on the club, as is expected to happen today: The club's first signing could well be a 36-year-old Libyan striker.
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The rest of the back pages are plastered with the news that Rafael Benitez's agent cautiously denying his client is leaving Liverpool for Juventus.
Ciro Ferrara's disastrous reign over the Bianconeri looks set to end this week following a run of eight defeats in their last 11 games that has the club dumped out of the Champions League and drop to sixth in the table.
The Old Lady is said to be targeting Benitez, whose team has won just one more match than Juve in the same period and found themselves knocked out of not one but two competitions.
Juve fans and the Italian press have finally lost patience with Ferrara after his side's soft centre was exposed once more by conceding a stoppage time goal to lose 2-1 against Roma.
The man in the frame to take over at the Turin club has seen his side eliminated from the FA Cup to a Reading goal in extra time and drop two points due to a late Stoke equaliser in two of their last three games.
Perhaps they should hold fire on an approach for Rafa until after Thursday's Coppa Italia clash against Inter.
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CHAT OF THE DAY: In this week's Eurosport-Yahoo! football podcast Alex Chick, Mike Hytner and Sean Fay ponder a world in which everybody loves Leeds and the Carling Cup is bigger than the FA Cup.
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "As always, whatever Materazzi does gets discussed. Even a carnival mask, which is sold everywhere. There was no intent to cause controversy, no wish to offend, no political implication. I'm sure that Berlusconi, as president of Milan and above all as a person with great self-irony..., will have smiled seeing me." Marco Materazzi hopes Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi saw the funny side of the Internazionale defender wearing a mask of the Milan owner at the end of the Milan derby.
FOREIGN VIEW: Doctors are fighting to save the life of Paraguay striker Salvador Cabanas, one of Latin America's most prolific goal scorers, who was shot in the head at a bar in Mexico City.
COMING UP: Four hot doses of Premier League action for you this evening, with live commentary of Portsmouth v West Ham, Tottenham Hotspur v Fulham and Wolverhampton Wanderers v Liverpool at 19:45, with Bolton Wanderers v Burnley kicking off soon after at 20:00.
The Australian Open quarter-finals are well underway. You can follow Andy Murray v Rafael Nadal, which should be getting underway any time now. You can follow live text commentary right here, or watch the action on British Eurosport (Sky 410 / Virgin 521) or via the Eurosport Player.