Ladies and gentlemen, Early Doors gives to you Barcelona's new signing Alexis Sanchez, otherwise known as 'El Nino Maravilla' - 'The Boy Wonder'.
It is quite the epithet to live up to, especially if you are joining a club that posses arguably the greatest collection of players in a generation. After all, there's nothing like a training session with Lionel Messi to put you firmly in your place.
And it is hardly as if the reigning FIFA Ballon d'Or winner is a one-man show at Camp Nou. His 53 goals in all competitions set a new club record, but as an attacking trident, he, David Villa and Pedro accumulated 98 between them in ten months. That's a pretty ridiculous 98 goals in 62 games.
But this is the daunting task that now awaits Sanchez at Barcelona: breaking into one of the most cohesive and deadly attacking units in the history of the game. It is not for nothing they were nicknamed 'MVP' by the enthralled Spanish media last season.
So, just why have Barcelona committed a possible 37.5 million euros to recruit Sanchez, prioritising the signing of the first Chilean to play for the club over their pursuit of a dyed-in-the-wool Catalan like Cesc Fabregas?
ED suspects you may have gathered this already, but he is pretty damn good. Indeed, those who have known him since a young age say he has always been destined to be one of the world's best.
As Nelson Acosta, the man who brought Sanchez into the first team at Cobreloa as a 16-year-old, told the Telegraph in June: "The first time I saw him I said he had no limits. He has everything. Normally in young boys there is something missing, be it skill, or vision, or the ability to beat a man. Not in Alexis. That is very rare."
Last season at Udinese he crucially added versatility to that long list of attributes.
Though invariably described as a winger, a position he has performed in with distinction for both club and country in recent years, in the second half of the Serie A campaign it was as a withdrawn striker, playing off Antonio Di Natale, that he blossomed, eventually scoring 12 goals and claiming six assists as Udinese secured a place in the Champions League.
The standout performance was his four-goal haul in a 7-0 evisceration of Palermo, at Palermo. Even Messi has only scored four goals once in a game - that famous night against Arsenal in the Champions League in 2010. Clearly the shift to a central role brought the best out of the young Chile star.
Coach Francesco Guidolin explained Sanchez's positional change: "We took a gamble on Sanchez. He had always played wide, but I put forward the idea of playing him behind the striker. From a central position he can be even more decisive. Playing there he is more unpredictable, harder to keep tabs on."
It is surely this ability to now play anywhere across the front three that has made him so attractive to Barcelona, particularly when you consider the dearth of options available to them should the unthinkable occur and Messi suffer a serious injury.
Bojan, on the brink of signing for Roma, was never able to quite make the breakthrough, despite his remarkable record at La Masia and immense initial promise. Furthermore, with Ibrahim Afellay either used in midfield or out wide, Barcelona had no real alternative to Messi in a role that makes very unconventional demands of what is nominally a central striker.
Though Villa could move across from the left, even Spain's record goalscorer and one of Europe's most prolific strikers of the past decade is ill-suited to the role's specific demands.
However, with his versatility and willingness to drift into space wherever it may be found, not to mention his expert dribbling, close control and finishing, Sanchez clearly has many of the same qualities that have made Messi the ultimate exponent of what has been called the 'False Nine' role.
Though initially, at least, Sanchez could be given game time at the expense of Pedro on the right wing - despite the Spaniard's impeccable service that has seen him described as "absolutely fundamental" by Guardiola, who also joked "If Pedro was Brazilian, he'd be called Pedrinho and we wouldn't have enough money to afford him" - ED reckons it will be as a deputy for Messi that the Chile star could demonstrate his true worth for his new side.
Either way, Barca now have four formidable attacking options to fill three places thanks to the union of 'MVP' and 'El Nino Maravilla'.
With an ability to cycle through their versatile forwards when the occasion demands, Pep Guardiola has an attacking carousel to match the passing carousel so admired and feared by Sir Alex Ferguson, and constructed by Xavi and Andres Iniesta in midfield.
It is an important step, because for all their brilliance last season, Guardiola's side always looked one or two injuries away from a crisis given the precarious lack of depth in their squad. Messi, Villa and Pedro were guaranteed starters in every important game.
While improving on near perfection is an almost impossible task, the addition of Sanchez demonstrates perfection can be reinforced, strengthened. His transfer will likely ensure Barca's grip on Lia Liga, and possibly Europe, is similarly secure.
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QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I don't want to turn Torres into an obsession like you people are trying to do. I am not going to waste time over this. I disagree that he is lacking in confidence ... To gain the confidence to find the back of the net, Torres needs training, tolerance and patience. It doesn't look like he is getting this at the moment but we are ready to give our forwards this patience." - Andre Villas-Boas stands by £50 million striker Fernando Torres after he drew a blank in a 1-0 friendly victory over a Malaysia XI on Thursday. As if you needed reminding, Torres scored one goal in 18 appearances for Chelsea last season.
FOREIGN VIEW: "I'll kill them if they've broken my Edinson. I don't really care about international competitions, but I just ask Uruguay to take good care of him. If he's not fit then he shouldn't play. Uruguay better be careful otherwise I will bring a never ending case against them." - Napoli president Antonio De Laurentiis warns Uruguay in no uncertain terms that he will not be afraid to sue the country if they risk the fitness of striker Edinson Cavani in Sunday's Copa America final against Paraguay.
COMING UP: We announce which No. 10 has made it into our Greatest Premier League XI - it looks like a straight fight between Dennis Bergkamp and Eric Cantona at present but there is still time to get your vote in. Paul Parker also brings us his latest column as the new season starts to loom ominously on the horizon.
Meanwhile, it is the second day of the first Test at Lord's between England and India, as Jonathan Trott looks to make another century on what is shaping up to be a nice sunny day. On the Tour de France, we remain in the Alps for Stage 19.