Early Doors was off yesterday. Did it miss anything?
It is a shame that ADUG, as they are rather clunkily known, didn't take over Manchester City last Friday.
Given three whole days to do their dealings, they would probably have brought Kaka, Leo Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo to Eastlands as well.
In 14 hours, City's new owners achieved what Chelsea failed to after an entire summer of soundbites and posturing - spend a staggering sum of cash on a world-class talent.
It was quite a day to be a City fan. No sooner had the new regime got its foot in the door than City went straight after Dimitar Berbatov. And David Villa. And Mario Gomez.
The Berbatov deal might have come off had United not sent a slightly plusher limo - driven by a nattily be-hatted Fergie - to pick him up at Manchester airport.
Undeterred, they immediately turned their attention to Robinho, and found a receptive audience, with Real Madrid eager to sell to anyone but Chelsea, and the player desperate to leave.
Although the English statement on Real Madrid's website made no mention of it, the Spanish version pointedly mentioned Real's conscious decision not to sell to Chelsea.
Before his more tactful official remarks, Real president Ramon Calderon told Spanish TV: "The fact that we have accepted an offer from Manchester City tells you he is not going for sporting reasons." Er, what exactly was he trying to say about City?
Real are the biggest attack dogs in the world of transfers. They are aggressive, persistent and need only a sniff of blood to rip the throat right out of any smaller club.
Manchester United know this all too well. Although they kept Cristiano Ronaldo, they have bite marks all over their legs, arms and face after a summer of vicious wrangling, while the feeling in Madrid is that the player is simply 'on loan' in England until next summer.
So when Calderon, the king of the hostile purchase, tells you he "deplores" your behaviour, you know you must have been staggeringly tactless.
That thrilling internet screen shot of the 'Robinho' replica shirt on sale in Chelsea's megastore will, as Revolving Doors rather sagely pointed out yesterday, go down as an "embarrassing testament to their own hubris".
Chelsea's summer spending spree consists of a measly two players - Jose Bosingwa and Deco. True, they are both good, and the Blues might even regain their Premier League title with them on board.
But this is not how it was supposed to be. This was meant to be a club with unlimited ambition and funds to match, and they have been gazumped by a team that were playing Grimsby not so long ago.
Abramovich's Chelsea promised to become football's Harlem Globetrotters, a real-life Fantasy Football team.
But almost every time they have tried to sign a superstar, they have failed. And on the one occasion they did get their man - Andriy Shevchenko - he turned out to be £30m of damp squib.
Almost everybody Early Doors has spoken to since last night's momentous events has gleefully said they can't wait to see Peter Kenyon's face.
Kenyon is the smug, soulless, corporate incarnation of 'Bad Chelsea'. A man who seemingly believes that if you act like the biggest club in the world, it saves you the bother of having to win any actual silverware.
So when he makes a pig's ear of a signing it provokes unfettered glee. Kenyon is not new to this, having cut his teeth cocking up transfers for Manchester United.
It is no coincidence that United's period of peak arrogance (and it was quite a peak), in the years after the 1999 Champions League win, coincided with Kenyon's plan for world domination.
In 2003 he blew the purchase of Ronaldinho by badgering, hassling and setting pointless deadlines, sending the Brazilian into the arms of a Barcelona side who had just finished sixth.
It was United's lucky day when Abramovich lured him south. Since then they have stayed just the right side of staggering ineptitude to land the likes of Wayne Rooney, Carlos Tevez and now Berbatov.
Not only has Abramovich missed out again, he has to deal with the ego-crushing reality that there is now a Premier League club 10 times richer than him.
Still, at least he can make a few quid sticking those Robinho shirts on eBay.
Which brings ED to its APPEAL OF THE DAY: Does anyone have a Robinho Chelsea shirt? Does anyone know how to get one? Early Doors is willing to pay handsomely for what could be the ultimate souvenir item for fans of all that is arrogant, foolish and money-obsessed about modern football. If anyone can help, email email@example.com.
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I always feel like I'm a kind of bulldozer, a fully insured bulldozer. If nobody likes it, it starts moving - even if there are cars in its way, it has to crush the cars and move. I can't stop. If I have an idea, I have to do it." Manchester City's new owner Dr Sulaiman Al Fahim. Yikes.
HEADLINE OF THE DAY: "Drogba back in action" - Never mind Robinho. Chelsea's official site hails the reserve outing of Didier Drogba, a man who spent last season telling anyone who would listen that he was fed up with life at Stamford Bridge.
TALKING POINT: What did you make of Deadline Day? What about City - will they finish fourth? Is Peter Kenyon really to blame for all the world's ills? And where were Arsenal? So much to talk about. Have your say below.