The Norwegian FA has cooked up a novel idea to even out one-sided matches: if a team go four goals down, they're allowed to bring on another player.
It might sound like Norwegian administrators have been sipping home-made Akvavit while staring at the fjords, but the idea has already had the backing of Blackburn and Norway legend Henning Berg.
"It's a good rule that will lead to more even matches," said Berg. "It's no fun to lose 17-0. It's no fun to win 17-0 either."
It got us thinking, though. Why stop there? There must be dozens of ways to liven up the game, so here's our draft proposal to the Powers That Be.
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Dear FA and FIFA,
Football is boring. Here are our ideas to make it better:
- Abolish the offside rule
- Wider goals to encourage more 7-6 scorelines
- Eradicate complaints of biased refereeing by letting teams supply their own match officials for 45 minutes each
- Enforced rush goalie: a goalkeeper must leave his area when the ball in the opponent's half, and leave his half when the ball is in the opponent's penalty area
- Substitutions to be decided by volume of crowd chanting
- Penalties to be replaced by a beat-the-keeper-from-half-way dribbling challenge
- Goals only count if scored via header, volley or from outside the area
- Headers and volleys scored from outside the area count double
- Goalkeepers to be fitted with Inspector Gadget-style arms (partly to help with the wider goals)
- One substitution per match to be decided at half time by opposing team's manager
- Managers to take a penalty each at start of match to give their team a possible head-start. Opposing managers will act as goalkeepers, ensuring a proper Wenger v Ferguson head-to-head at long last
- Remote electric shocks to be administered to players deemed by phone-in vote not to be performing
- 18-yard boxes made of quicksand to both encourage long-range shooting and discourage diving
- Power play 1, in which a second ball is thrown onto the pitch if any game is still tied with 10 minutes left
- Anyone who scores an own goal must wear fancy dress for the rest of the match
- Players who engage in a physical altercation will be permitted to settle their differences without being sent off by way of a piggyback jousting, using their team captains as horses. If captains are involved, they must use any auburn haired player on their side as their horse in tribute to the late, great Red Rum
- Power play 2, in which teams who are trailing with 10 minutes left get the benefit of a colour-coded second ball that only they are allowed to score with
- Penalty shoot-out to replace pre-match coin toss
- Coin toss to replace penalty shoot-outs
- Glass walls around the pitch to to create five-a-side style off-the-wall passing options
- Referees to receive on-pitch eye tests in the wake of poor decisions
- Removal of one player per team every 90 seconds in extra time if the match is still drawn
- Instant red card for any player swearing at the referee.... Okay, sorry, we realise we're just being ridiculous now.
Leave your suggestions for new rules of the game below and we'll make sure they're included when we courier the proposals off to Wembley and Zurich.