"You know the modern-day player -
they're a little bit milky." - Stuart
'Psycho' Pearce when asked whether Connor Wickham had been badly
injured when he rolled his ankle during England U21 training.
think I'd rather wipe my backside with a broken bottle than do that again."
- Even Isle of Man TT legend John
McGuinness wasn't too happy about the conditions during the iconic
race on Thursday.
fat p****... You're a c**k." - Manchester United's Rio Ferdinand gets to the nub of the issue as he discusses his
missed drug test in September 2003 with Mirror columnist Oliver Holt.
back!" - Serena Williams
celebrating the news that Serena Williams is back in action after almost a year
out of the game.
was walking around tournaments for a long time with all his fighting gear on,
so I had to give him a lot of Fila stuff to make him try and blend in a little
bit. He looked like he was a bodyguard. I don't need one of them just
yet!" - British tennis player James
Ward discusses the problems of using an untamed Russian MMA fighter as a
think Vikki will be getting the divorce papers out yet!" - Newlywed
snooker star Mark Selby is confident
that his new bride won't be upset that he's heading off to China, Thailand and
Australia for tournaments within a few weeks of returning from honeymoon.
going bald at 25, why not?" - Wayne
Rooney gives a logically flawless explanation as to why he had a hair
transplant. Kudos for the England star for taking the revelations of his
reputation is now at an all-time low and obviously the election with just one
candidate was something of a farce - but it has to become more transparent and
more accountable." - British Prime Minister David Cameron sticks the boot into FIFA, in the process joining that very small band of politicians
who accidentally say something honest.
just a dirty dog. He has no morals. It was one thing having an affair with
Imogen, but this is said to be with his brother's wife, for God's sake. I could
almost understand if it was someone else, another footballer's wife - then so
what? But not with his own sister-in-law. And it went on for such a long time.
It is horrendous." - Ryan Giggs's
auntie Joanna Wilson says what just about everyone else in Britain was thinking
after news emerged of his eight-year affair with his sister-in-law. Giggs's
last public appearance was at Wembley. Perhaps his next appearance should be on the Jeremy Kyle show?
absolutely no idea who those people were. That day in Naples there were many
people around me. I am astonished and disappointed." - Mario Balotelli explains his latest bit
of spectacularly bad publicity after leaked police documents revealed that two mafia chiefs gave him a guided tour of the most notoriously crime-ridden
district of Naples.
"I am going to be
in the best condition physically going into this season that I have been for
the last 10 years." - Steven
Gerrard claims that his injury lay-off has helped him roll back the years.
Let's hope it stops before he regresses any further, or he'll
end up getting acne and downloading ringtones of songs by the Saturdays.
"I haven't spoken
with Alex Ferguson. He has told me nothing. He never tells me anything." -
An insight into the management techniques of Manchester United's legendary
boss, courtesy of reserve goalkeeper Tomasz
"Every time I looked up
at the pavilion during Sri Lanka's second innings, I saw this big broken window
and I felt stupid more than anything else... There wasn't any malice or anger in
it at all." - England wicketkeeper Matt
Prior tries to convince the world that he is stupid rather than dangerously hot-headed after smashing a window at Lord's after being run out against Sri Lanka.
"Expecting from him 90-minute
running means not knowing and not understanding Arshavin." - Dick Advocaat uses the long-forgotten 'Le
Tissier defence' to explain why Arsenal shouldn't be too harsh on misfit midfielder
"(The) job is one of the best
available in football at the moment. It really is a top, top job. It's a very
exciting challenge and would be a great opportunity for anybody." -
100 points to anybody who guessed that this was Mark Robins talking about the vacant managerial position at Cardiff City.