Early Doors - Your morning briefing blog

Cloughie cannot win

Thu Jan 08 08:57AM

'Ooh great', thought Early Doors yesterday, 'Derby are playing. Haven't had a chance to rip it out of them for a while.'

What's more, they were playing Manchester United - a certain defeat and a chance to pour cold water all over the Nigel Clough era.

And what happened? They only went and won. Easily too. United's best chances came in the form of Cristiano Ronaldo free-kicks, which were duly whacked straight over the bar.

Ronaldo's free-kicks are now so bad they may soon start to have the precise opposite effect of Rory Delap's long throws.

While teams have started conceding corners rather than face a Delap throw-in, they may now start deliberately fouling United players on the edge of the box, safe in the knowledge that they are almost certain to win a goal-kick.

The worst thing that can happen is that somebody ends up with a concave face if Ronaldo shoots into the wall.

United never looked like scoring, despite playing against a side that narrowly beat non-league opponents 4-3 in the Cup on Saturday.

Four days earlier they conceded three goals against Forest Green Rovers, and yet here they were repelling the champions of England, Europe, the world and probably parts of other galaxies too.

Maybe it was that United fielded a 'weakened' team featuring Tevez, Scholes, Vidic and Anderson, with Ronaldo, Rooney and Carrick coming off the bench.

Or maybe it was the difference in managerial ability between Chris Hutchings - who presided over the Forest Green near-debacle - and nobody.

Clough sat in the stands having been given the 'watching brief' that is increasingly fashionable for new managers.

New Nottingham Forest boss Billy Davies did something similar in the FA Cup on Saturday and saw his team thrash Manchester City at Eastlands.

Although the watching brief is meant to help managers settle into their job, all it really seems to do it exhibit the utter pointlessness of the profession - the way to seal an unlikely and famous victory is to make sure the gaffer comes nowhere near the dressing room.

So, what does Early Doors have against Derby? Nothing really, except that Pride Park is the only football ground it has been to that has a Starbucks in it.

Despite that nod to early-noughties consumerism, all the Frappuccinos in Seattle cannot disguise the unpleasantness of the location - an industrial estate sandwiched between a railway line and a water treatment facility on the outskirts of town.

Incidentally, Atletico Madrid's Vicente Calderon stadium encompasses a car showroom - possibly to help the club drive their manager to the dole office every three months.

Either that or it was a dodgy sideline set up by the late, lamented Jesus Gil to flog the sports cars of his unwitting players during games.

Anyway, Early Doors doesn't mind Derby - it just can't help but be massively cynical about the Nigel Clough hype.

Clough Jr cannot possibly be a success, simply because of the weight of family history weighing on him.

Anything short of promotion within 18 months, European qualification within 5 years and global domination inside a decade will be deemed a failure.

Ask Jordi Cruyff how easy it is to follow in the footsteps of a famous father. Mind you, Jordi Cruyff was rubbish.

Later this month Clough takes on Forest in the FA Cup - the team that named a stand after his dad.

The Cloughs are in the unlikely position of being revered by fans of both Derby and Nottingham Forest, despite the surprisingly hostile rivalry between the two clubs.

Brian Clough is loved by Forest fans for leading the team to a league title and two European Cups; Nigel Clough is loved because he scored a few goals, but mainly because his dad led the team to a league title and two European Cups.

And that is his problem. He will be forever in his father's shadow, and has no hope of emulating him, even if he puts on a green jumper, starts drinking too much and calls everybody 'young man'.

- - -

QUOTE OF THE DAY: "It was Chelsea's fault. Real Madrid did not want me to go there, but Chelsea did not help themselves. Everything would have gone ahead but they put that picture of me on the website and Madrid were very upset," Robinho confirms what everybody knows - it's Peter Kenyon's fault he didn't sign for Chelsea.

FOREIGN VIEW: Gazzetta dello Sport must have been watching Ronaldo at Pride Park last night. They ask who is the player of the decade - Kaka or Lionel Messi?

Comments91 - 120 of 567
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Hey Jay, did you enjoy the Derby match lastnight? It was laughable! Yeah I think Hyypia’s days in the Top Level football are coming to an end although he is still useful as cover. Agger is very good but maybe not as good as Skrtel, time will tell with him back from his long spell out. I’ll never forget Agger’s goal against Chelsea in the CL…Brilliant! I hope he stays, If I were him I would stick about until at least the end of the season as Liverpools prospects of winning something this season are high!
From kevin1985kane on Thu Jan 08 11:19AM
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821 - You are intitaled to your opinion but for me there is only one Early Doors!
From kevin1985kane on Thu Jan 08 11:21AM
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Kev Kano - Funnily enough i rate Agger more than Skrtel, seems a bit more consistent and more comfortable on the ball. Hyypia makes me laugh, when is he gonna stop dyeing his hair lol. Hes had a good season so far. I think Rafa made the right decision to drop him from Champs league squad. Rafa is getting the best out of most his players, but for how long will determine the whether or not u are Prem winners. Its still hard to come to terms with the fact liverpool might win the prem, which is strange as when i was younger they were easily the best team.
From jay8my on Thu Jan 08 11:31AM
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813 - Are you Jimmy White?
From kevin1985kane on Thu Jan 08 11:32AM
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Yeah nice one Bob now i dont know where thefuck my answer is.
KEV KANO i did answer ur last question but its been spammed all over. See this is when spamming really gets on my nerves.
From jay8my on Thu Jan 08 11:38AM
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well done guys!!!!
All of you are totallyretarded@#$%ers!!!!!!!!
From johnnyevz82 on Thu Jan 08 11:40AM
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KGH = @#$%!
From ryandp04 on Thu Jan 08 11:41AM
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Why can't people just igtnore each other!
Bugger it I'm off i haven't got time to scroll through 3 pages of rubbish to find an answer of something!
From johnnyevz82 on Thu Jan 08 11:50AM
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I think Ronaldo should go back to being a winger and start to lay balls on a plate for rooney/berba instead of trying for goal everytime he gets ball! Its no wonder Rooner/Berba dont score!. Very Greedy is Mr Ronaldo (ps i am a manu fan)
From wolfiesmith2000 on Thu Jan 08 11:58AM
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In a few years after Fergie retires Man-U will be proud of the fact they only lost 1-0 to Derby..
From kuide8888 on Thu Jan 08 12:10PM
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GET SPAM OUT!! GET SPAM OUT!! GET SPAM OUT!!
From jay8my on Thu Jan 08 12:15PM
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the writer of this article is so stupid i refused to even finish reading, ronaldo had 2 freekicks yesterday and 1 which was the best chance was a @#$%'s hair from going in the back of the net, besides he was only on the pitch for about 20mins. agreed united played badly but get ur facts right before slating the team.
where does yahoo get these baised, novice, amature writers from first paul parker now these t*@ts.
From smokezone_crew on Thu Jan 08 12:15PM
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what a load of B OLLOCKS why cant the fools on this post talk about football rather than complete C RAP
From maxdobinson on Thu Jan 08 12:24PM
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good luck to cloughie...and i hope to see you eat your words at some point...and as a unted fan i believe derby won the game by stopping the united boys playing rather than just getting lucky...well played derby and apologies when we put four past you at the theatre of dreams....
From stuartxland on Thu Jan 08 12:26PM
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I Agree, Man U were Rubbish last night, Ronaldo still has not Recovered from New Years Eve Celebrations in Madeira, The Madeira wine and the Poncha are still in his Blood stream, Lets wait and see what happens this weekend. Derby's Goal was Spectacular, They Played better then Most Premiership teams against Man U. It will however be a Different story at OLD Trafford. OH Bye the Way, Recipe for Poncha, I Part Sugar Cane Fire water, 1 Part Honey, 1 Part Fresh Lemon Juice, +- 3 pieces of lemon Zest,
1 Part finely crushed ICE. Put all ingredientes into a cocktail shaker, Shake it till the Ice has melted and there is frith at the top. Serve in Double Shot Glasses and Down it like a shooter.
From frooti_69 on Thu Jan 08 12:30PM
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Cloughie as made a big mistake sacked in 6 mnths no football league experiance should have stayed at burton albion .
name means nowt darby are doomed to championship football or league 1 at the end of season
From conanbnorton on Thu Jan 08 12:36PM
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what a load of spanners on this post get a life
From maxdobinson on Thu Jan 08 12:39PM
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get a life spammers
From kajiraasha on Thu Jan 08 12:44PM
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get a life you worthless spammers
From kajiraasha on Thu Jan 08 12:46PM
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hehe lucky rams fans don't go thinking u will beat man.u now and u r going to win promotion u r all noobs lol COME ON THE SWANS
From chrisahearne on Thu Jan 08 12:48PM
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hehe lucky rams fans don't go thinking u will beat man.u now and u r going to win promotion u r all noobs lol COME ON THE SWANS
From chrisahearne on Thu Jan 08 12:48PM
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Okay. Derby fans... enjoy your 5 minutes of fame, you'll never see United play so badly again. Yes, we were absolute @#$%, Yes, Common's goal was a cracker and yes, your lot played out of their skins. One question.... why can't they play like that regularly. Admitted, United made them look better than they really are, but the football they played belied the relegation candidates they are. You got a good result so enjoy it... but don't doubt that the mauling that awaits you at Old Trafford.
From ared4ever on Thu Jan 08 01:06PM
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Hello all, thought I'd have a wee look to see what the craic was on here the noo, but I see it's just the same bunch of immature cnuts spraffing the same BS. Happy New Year to anyone that wants it, may you all prosper in your arseholeness.
From rob_snaith on Thu Jan 08 01:08PM
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ALrite our Rob, hows things....United definately suck!
From kevin1985kane on Thu Jan 08 01:12PM
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Actually not you at all Jude, your nonsense doesn't pissme off at all, it's just how easily others are affected by it and decide to try to match your wit by retaliating in a derivative, uninteresting, ball-achingly unfunny manner that grinds my gears.
Job is good ta.
Utd were pretty pants, Derby were pretty good.
From rob_snaith on Thu Jan 08 01:20PM
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This is beyond sad. Kgh_r you are a true parasite. Grow up please, what are you 5 years old? Now wonder you sit on here all day, you probably don't know how to interact with real people. Jude is bad but you are appalling. I don't know what you are trying to gain through this, but you are not gaining or winning anything only losing face showing your true colours.
Can we all report abuse?
From john.smithe76 on Thu Jan 08 01:21PM
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john smithe, surely reporting abuse is a waste of your valuable work time, thereby making you the same kinda leeching parasite you have oft accused us of being.
From danny_saks on Thu Jan 08 01:28PM
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Yesterday was about Derby beating MANUTD, let them enjoy it. MANUTD always has this knack for losing when it really doesn't matter, it didn't matter yesterday but it was embarassing and trusting SAF, he'll make those boys so uncomfortable you'll have to feel for Chelsea as they will be at the receiving end of Manutd's wrath!!!!
From djackall on Thu Jan 08 01:29PM
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1590 - Is this your blog now?
From kevin1985kane on Thu Jan 08 01:29PM
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KGH_R - Maybe I was being biased towards you...you being Irish and all but there is a limit to amount resiliance one man can take! Stop thisshite and grow thefuck up...Im sick of thisshite...you are p1ssing everyone off
From kevin1985kane on Thu Jan 08 01:39PM
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