History repeating
Thu Jul 03 09:02AM
August 2005: Deportivo La Coruna winger Albert Luque signs five-year contract at Newcastle United and promptly expresses his delight at the move:
"I'm very happy. I'm excited. It's a great place to play.
"I'm looking forward to playing in front of the Newcastle fans."
July 2008: Real Mallorca winger Jonas Gutierrez signs five-year contract at Newcastle United and promptly expresses his delight at the move:
"I cannot tell you how excited I am to be joining Newcastle United.
"The Premier League is a great place to play and I cannot wait to meet my new team-mates and prove myself to the Newcastle United fans."
Sounds uncannily similar, does it not? It's almost as if they were told exactly what to say by the very same over-zealous press officer.
Like Gutierrez, Luque (pictured, in trademark bench-warming pose) arrived with a reputation as a fleet-footed, technically gifted winger, who would inject a flair into the Newcastle side that had been missing since the heady days of David Ginola and Faustino Asprilla.
Sadly for Luque he found the rough and tumble of the English top-flight more problematic than he had expected and, one spectacular career nose-dive later, he's currently plying his trade for Ajax in the European feeder league that is the Dutch Eredivisie.
Of course, Gutierrez needs only to better Luque's record of one goal and about 0.5 decent performances in 25 matches to out-do his less than illustrious predecessor, but the very fact Newcastle have signed him suggests they've learnt little from previously unsuccessful transfer market dalliances with players who made their names in Spain.
This, remember, is the side that prised just 19 league appearances out of up-and-coming centre-half Marcelino Elena after signing him from Real Mallorca for a then sizeable £6 million in 1999.
Mind you, if Newcastle were in the business of learning from past mistakes they probably wouldn't have invited Kevin Keegan back to the club.
- - -
Manchester City have paid £19 million to CSKA Moscow to make Brazilian striker Jo the club's record signing, but ED thought City might have missed a trick.
The first photos that emerged from the player's unveiling were of Jo holding his new City shirt with 'JO 14' on the back, and you can bet that replica shirts bearing his name and number will be flying off the rails at the Manchester City club shop as soon as the croaky-voiced Ricky Hatton-alike teenagers of the city have cut down on the fags long enough to be able to afford them.
Back when ED was a lad you had to pay by the letter and number for shirts to be personalised in such a manner, so ED decided to have a look on the City website to calculate exactly how much money City are losing out on by signing such an abruptly monikered player.
Unfortunately for fans of punchlines that actually work, a 'JO 14' shirt costs exactly the same amount as a 'RICHARDS 2' or even a 'BOJINOV 29', leaving ED's painfully predictable 'they should have signed Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink' pay-off thoroughly redundant.
- - -
Anthony Le Tallec's move from Liverpool to Le Mans yesterday came as a massive shock to Reds fans - not because they were desperately hoping to hold onto the player, but because the vast majority probably didn't realise he was still at the club.
Le Tallec spent last season on loan at Le Mans, having previously undergone loan spells at Sunderland, Sochaux and Le Havre, and last pulled on a Liverpool shirt in a 3-0 Champions League qualifying victory over Welsh side TNS in July 2005.
In honour of Le Tallec's sleeper role at Anfield over the past three years, Early Doors presents a list of players who you might be surprised to learn are on the books of their respective Premier League clubs:*
Ian Walker, Bolton Wanderers
Andy van der Meyde, Everton
Bernardo Corradi, Manchester City
Paul Dickov, Manchester City
Danny Mills, Manchester City
David May, Manchester United
Shola Ameobi, Newcastle United
Hossam Ghaly, Tottenham Hotspur
Henri Camara, Wigan Athletic
* One of these is a complete fabrication.
- - -
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I can only say that I will spend the period of my recovery in my house in Sintra, but regarding my future I cannot say anything." Cristiano Ronaldo might have to reconsider his vow of silence when he realises that it's actually in his best interests to keep Manchester United sweet if he wants the club's doctors to fix his knackered ankle.
TALKING POINT: Before descending into a deeply puzzling dialogue about the whys and wherefores of snake-breeding, yesterday's comments board threw up a few interesting takes on the subject of which Premier League player is likely to be the first to be arrested next season.
Recent porridge-eater Joey Barton was an obvious favourite, but henrikedwardlarsson nominated Middlesbrough defender Emanuel Pogatetz, claiming - with chilling seriousness - that "he is going to rip someone's heart out, and he will be jailed for a very long time".
chrisnewman950, meanwhile, predicts that "the entire Stoke squad will be arrested next season for crimes against football".
Today - for no real reason whatsoever, with which Premier League footballer would you most like to go for a pint?
COMING UP: Transfer Talk, Version Premier League and Version Championship, plus all the latest guff and counter-guff in the endlessly thrilling Cristiano Ronaldo, Gareth Barry and Ronaldinho transfer sagas. And maybe, if you're lucky, a little bit of actual news.
And if foregone conclusions and the fruits of pushy parenting are your bag, why not check out the Williams sisters strolling into the Wimbledon women's singles final from 13:00 BST?
Maybe 2morrow we can discuss movies on the football blog?
From jude_surf on Thu Jul 03 04:52PMthe most handsome EPL player is Robert Huth
From jacknfor on Thu Jul 03 04:53PMChelsea rule in London inbetween the other sucky clubs. Bring it on next season! Maybe you need a few more midfielders?
From jude_surf on Thu Jul 03 04:54PMJack I'm glad you got that out of your system, now pull yourself together man!
From jude_surf on Thu Jul 03 04:55PMWhy not Jude? Shall we have a little side bet on who's the first to wet themselves over Angelina Jolie in 'Wanted'?
From danny_saks on Thu Jul 03 04:56PMWell foxy Roxy you've not been very talkative today, I'll also work harder tomorrow. Well maybe, it is Friday after all... Have a good one there in Essex.
From jude_surf on Thu Jul 03 04:58PMmovies on the blog will be very interesting jude
From jacknfor on Thu Jul 03 04:58PMYeah! Movie day tomorrow. I'll remember the popcorn!
From jude_surf on Thu Jul 03 05:02PMi think hcelski will do better than last season in terms of not letting matches go to defeats and draws from winning positions, but who knows if they can turn that into trophies, i think spurs will do similar, how could we do worse? my main worry now is that we couldn't give ghaly away and he might get on the pitch during an actual match next season as for them ruling london, it's not a give away to them, cant see us or the arse-nal letting them have it for free, you'll have to watch out for city now they have Jo, will they take 6 points again?
From roxydgurl on Thu Jul 03 05:03PMDanny is Angelina Jolie that beautiful?I don't think so.Jude wats ur opinion?
From jacknfor on Thu Jul 03 05:04PMsorry about my non-participation today judas, had to work some again today, i look forward to movie day tomorrow and here's a starter from me, which is better the movie of Dune or the TV movie of Dune
From roxydgurl on Thu Jul 03 05:05PMroxydgurl,spurs will finish at most at the 7th position.they aren't better yhan that
From jacknfor on Thu Jul 03 05:08PMWest Ham will be the last bastion of non Roman invasion everyone will rally round ballack steinschweiger and rammstein to repel the evil roman empire
Every one carring knives and swords will be swept up and dumped in the middle of the North Sea
From arttidesco on Thu Jul 03 05:09PMwho do you think with occupy the top 6 spots then jacknfor, we've had 5th for the 2 previous seasons thant the last one and now we have modric, dos santos and gomez, if we keep keane and there's almost a chance of berbatov staying then why 7th?
From roxydgurl on Thu Jul 03 05:10PMChelsea,Liverpool,Arsenal,Man City,Man Utd and Newcastle in that order.Dos santos and modric are still to get used to the EPL maybe next year but not this year
From jacknfor on Thu Jul 03 05:16PMi'm off for the day folks.See y all tomorrow at the movies
From jacknfor on Thu Jul 03 05:17PMi think man city are gonna win everything this season, but losing paul dickov was a mistake so its gonna be hard
From dustbrother101 on Thu Jul 03 05:25PMi cant see man city and newcastle have got anything more than last season so far, there's nothing yet to say they have the ambition to do anything, man city have jo and newcastle have spiderman, but still have keegan, i cant see they will do any better than spurs aston vila blackburn or pompey, but i think the ambition is there from spurs if no-one else yet, stil a few weeks left to get a has been in to spoil the season before it starts, ghaly anyone????
From roxydgurl on Thu Jul 03 05:50PMThe question we need to ask ourselves is; why do any of us exist at all? What's the point in anything.
From samuelbanks on Thu Jul 03 06:17PMGot some nice movies for you reference the point of everything Sam, Can't waqit for movie day and I might be able to enlighten you some sleep well
From arttidesco on Thu Jul 03 07:23PMDo you know that there have been approximately 25,000 comments posted in ED hstory.
From samuelbanks on Thu Jul 03 08:53PMPeter Crouch looks like a @#$%.He's not as useful as a @#$% though.
From samuelbanks on Thu Jul 03 08:55PMI would definitely take Ronaldo to grab a pint with, I would even pay for it myself, just to get him drung, so I could break the pitcher on the @#$%'s head....
Not to say both of his legs would be severely broken. Just for being such and airhead and ego-maniac...
I'd take Frank Rijkaard out, and treat him to a pitcher or two, just to get closer to his daughter...
From amir_bos on Thu Jul 03 09:06PMI'd have a pint with Andy Reid. I bet he's a tank.
From miketaken02 on Thu Jul 03 10:55PM"I'm very happy. I'm excited. It's a great place to play. Sounds just like coming to ED
Lastest on this thread I hope 
From arttidesco on Fri Jul 04 07:11AMit does not count because your gay and you didnt post last yesterday
From dannickbates on Fri Jul 04 08:51AMJust cause my avatar wears leder hosen does not make me gay, though it might mean I am in touch with my feminine side I am still claiming latest Sir Cliff Master Bates Richards
Now lets talk movies
From arttidesco on Fri Jul 04 09:21AMit is awesome. i just saw a similar one on *multiraciallove.com* u may enjoy more there. So many hot singles are enjoying themselves there...
From ailycindy on Wed Jul 09 02:22AMit is awesome. i just saw a similar one on *multiraciallove.com* u may enjoy more there. So many hot singles are enjoying themselves there...
From ailycindy on Wed Jul 09 02:25AMso nice discussion, it was said this guy just enjoys hot dating with a black star on a wonderful club*****m u l t i r a c i a l l o v e.c o m**** so many hot pics and videos are there...
From ailycindy on Wed Jul 09 02:26AM
Comment on this article
Please sign in to add your comments.
Early Doors – Your morning briefing
Sport Newsletter
Catch up with all the latest news
Sign up to our free daily newsletter to recieve the latest news straight to your inbox. Make sure you don’t miss a thing.
Sign up now
This site is Copyright © 2009 Yahoo! and Eurosport. All rights reserved.
- Terms of Service
- Updated Privacy Policy
- Copyright/IP Policy
- Remarks and Suggestions
- Corporate info
- Jobs at Eurosport
Notice: We collect personal information on this site. To learn more about how we use your information, see our Privacy Policy.