Defending the indefensible
Fri Mar 14 09:00AM
Early Doors has a crazy theory - Frank Lampard is the most underrated player in the Premier League.
Does anyone actually think he is any good, either as a man or as a footballer? Early Doors has always written him off as rubbish, and yet it can't help but notice a big, steaming pile of evidence to the contrary.
That privileged, public school upbringing, the slightly portly frame and the 20 deflected goals a season just don't make him that appealing.
When people say he and Steven Gerrard can't play together for England, nobody talks about dropping Stevie G. Fat Frank is always the 'logical' fall guy.
Even Chelsea fans don't seem to like him that much, despite the fact that he is frighteningly consistent and - before this season - hardly ever missed a game.
Those in the market for a blood-and-guts Englishman gravitate towards John Terry, while Didier Drogba gets the credit for leading the side's attack.
But over the last four-and-a-half years he has weighed in with 60 league goals and 46 assists. No midfielder in the country has been more effective.
Now Chelsea have got in on the act, cussing Lamps by stalling pointlessly over a new contract that they will obviously give him in the end.
Peter Kenyon might be trying to make a point about tightening the purse strings, but in which case why did he recently hand a new five-year deal to Paulo Ferreira?
A former Mourinho pet favourite, Ferreira is now a 29-year-old benchwarmer who has the makings of being the new Winston Bogarde - a man who started two league games in four seasons at Stamford Bridge, politely refusing the club's invitation to leave and preferring to see out his £2 million-a-year contract.
If karma really existed, Lampard would tell Kenyon to stuff off and sign for Barcelona on a Bosman.
- - -
Following his recent goal splurge, Lampard's stock is now back on the rise and, once he bags that lucrative £130,000-a-week deal, he will go back to being massively overhyped.
These things come full circle. Chelsea were mocked for paying £17 million for Claude Makelele, a man who appeared to contribute absolutely nothing.
Then a fit of emperor's-new-clothes appreciation broke out, with pundits drooling over the way he read the game and did all 'the little things'.
As a result, the defensive midfielder was thrust into the unlikely situation of being the sexiest position in football, and men like George Boateng and Gilberto Silva were treated like sporting deities.
Pele was somewhat ahead of the game when he became briefly infatuated with Nicky Butt at the 2002 World Cup, declaring him the player of the tournament.
Order has since been restored - it is now generally acknowledged that anyone with a modicum of self-discipline can operate effectively as a holding midfielder, and that Cristiano Ronaldo - not Owen Hargreaves - is the man who makes Manchester United tick.
- - -
If Steed Malbranque turns to page 89 of the Sun, he will find himself pictured inside a milk bottle, like one of those matchstick model ships.
The Frenchman has been labelled a 'bottler' (geddit?) after ducking out of Spurs' shootout loss to PSV Eindhoven - despite taking penalties during Fulham days.
Although Malbranque missed three of his nine spot-kicks while at Craven Cottage, he surely had a better chance of hitting the target than scuff-merchant Pascal Chimbonda.
But where is the photo of Andy Johnson inside a pint of semi-skimmed? AJ once scored 11 penalties in a season for Crystal Palace, yet was taken off for Thomas Gravesen in extra time, shortly prior to Everton's defeat on penalties to Fiorentina.
- - -
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "Mr Coppell is the boss here but basically he does nothing during training." Reading's Marek Matejovsky reveals the secret of Steve Coppell's success.
FOREIGN VIEW: Remember Freddy Adu? Well, he 's still alive and scoring massive goals. The former New Pele stuck away a penalty in the United States's 1-0 win against Panama last night to help Team USA towards the Olympics. Adu's side drew the other day against Cuba, who subsequently had to play against Honduras with only 10 men after the rest of the squad defected.
TODAY'S TALKING POINT: ianbec on whether shirt colour makes any difference: "Don't know about the colour, but what about the design? Apparently some academics think wearing vertically-striped clothing makes you look thinner. Is this why Mark Viduka signed for Newcastle?"
To discuss over the weekend: Who is the most underrated player in the Premier League?
DISS OF THE DAY: The third and final part of kevmun82's devastating critique of the Early Doors triumvirate: "I really tried to think of something witty (for 'witty', also read 'juvenile') to say about the one at the back but I was struggling. I kinda liked him in a way (not THAT way), until I realised just how smug he looks in that picture. The kind of look that says 'I drive my Granny's old Corsa, but I've tricked it out, souped it up and now it's a pulling MACHINE!! No, I don't have a girlfriend and yes, I still live in my mum's Box Room despite being in my mid-30s, but I don't have a bedtime AND my friends are allowed to stay over, so beat that'."
Thanks kev, it's been a lot of fun. You are now the lucky recipient of a life ban from appearing on Early Doors.
COMING UP: The Champions League draw is live a-live oh! Follow video streaming from midday. Also, stick around for our full and massive preview of all the weekend's action.
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IM this storyFLs game is based on movement, not necessarily personal skill. In my opinion the international game, due to the slow speed it is played at, doesn't reward a midfielder who can expose the inability of the opposition to cover his late arriving runs. The problem for frank as time goes on is that he will lose the ability to get up and down during games and consequently his impact on games will decline even further. The strange anomoly to this theory is the goals he scored for england back around euro2004, where he was the best england midfielder (and gerrard was sulking)...but why so good then and so poor now, innate confidence that he was the dogs danglies that has subsequently been eroded ?
From stuchristieph on Fri Mar 14 11:41AMThe most under-rated player in the prem is Boa-morte, he's garbage, him and Cole are both terrible players,surely to god there are better players than these 2, 3 in fact Mullins is crap too. Curbs get rid, quick!
From neilwestham on Fri Mar 14 11:48AMWho the F told you that chelsea fans dont like frank, he is in our heart as john , drog , cole and all the team we are not like you A,H that if he leaves we will hate them , if he stays WE LOVE HIM if he leaves we will love him for the service he did for the club, he is the Vice captain how can you say he is not given importance in the club... You seem to be a Man utd or barca fan and your truly writing a biased bullshit..
From angharzai on Fri Mar 14 12:17PMArteta and Defoe are the most underated (Ben Ayoun to an extent but he is given quite a bit of credit still)... I don't like Lamps or or Chelski but there's no denying he's quality, he's been one of the most consistent players in the premiership and has scored tonnes of goals from midfield. The dude that said no team would want him, what a load of BS, any team in the prem league would take him
Another note about chelski, they drew Fenerbahce in the champs league, very, very lucky indeed!
Arsenalv Liverpool should be interesting
As a MU fan, can't complain too much about getting Roma, we should deal with them easily! Excitin times
From double_t_uk2002 on Fri Mar 14 12:20PMPatrice Evra is the most under-rated player in the EPL. Best left back in the League. Period! His attacking play (dribbles, flicks, etc) would make most strikers green with envy. Not a bad defender either.
From baydo12 on Fri Mar 14 12:26PMWest Ham grow some lovely players- Lamps, Defoe, Cole, Ferdinand- and hire some complete pillocks- Cole, Deadsnake (Boa-Morte, Mullins, Paintsil. The solution? sack Curbishley and make the Academy bloke in charge cos he seems to know what he's doing!
From whfcuptonpark on Fri Mar 14 12:32PMI know I may be singular in my opinion, but by far the most underrated player is Andriy Shevchenko. When he does get in, he plays as a second striker to Africa's best, has to deal with Lamps firing from distance at will, Joe Cole's trickery, and a team that is primarily defensive. No way is Kalou better than Sheva, he can just run faster. Kalou scores tap in goals off of the quality of other people's play. Sheva's goal v. Tottenham is the FA Cup is pure class, it's just a shame I don't get to see more of his fine play. Time to break out old Milan DVD's (Oh wait, all I have is a little thing called the Champions League Final v. Liverpool!)
From mrsims150 on Fri Mar 14 12:47PMThe most under-rated player in the Prem.. Fernando Torres! If you think he's class now.. You wait and see!
From pickles14 on Fri Mar 14 12:51PMlamps is the best..no one ..not even steven g comes close...Lamps for life...Chelasea for life...
Omobobo
From dickky4004 on Fri Mar 14 01:16PMTorres isn't underated, he's always praised. Half of you don't even know the meaning of the word! Sheva underated? Nahh mate, he needs a one way ticket back to Milan, he flopped at Chelsea
From double_t_uk2002 on Fri Mar 14 01:33PMMost under-rated player name in the Prem?
Tightarse Bramble.
From ralph.seaton on Fri Mar 14 01:59PMRE: Post#25; Oh, come on Kev. Now you just kissing ED's ass...
As for today's talking point; I feel that the most underrated player nowadays is Paul Scholes, sure he's past his prime but he is rarely mentioned anymore. Another player I feel underrated would be Pennant. He just needs more minutes at Liverpool to prove himself more.
From yehia18 on Fri Mar 14 02:26PMI think that Emre is massivly over rated as a player, is really good to watch and he has good skills and makes some brillaint runs. Never hear him mentioned though.
From raulpeeves on Fri Mar 14 02:45PMED how abt doing a piece on the worst penalty kicks ever taken. For me the one taken by Pires for Arsenal when he nudged the ball an inch or so for presumably henry to finish, takes the aclaim
From umar2050 on Fri Mar 14 02:50PMpennant s useless his crosses are so bad he wouldn,t even scare a scottish keeper and most of them are vampires.lumpy is ok must be close to scoring as many goals as derby this season, scores more every season than most strikers in prem,shirka sheva take note.
From coe606 on Fri Mar 14 02:58PMClichy underrated? Not after his Birmingham gaffe, which could cost Arsenal the championship. Defenders are always underrated until they are past it, at which time they become 'the towering colossus at the heart of Rovers defence', a colossus because they can't run any more. Through gritted teeth at the moment, I concede it has to be any of the ManUtd defenders.
From james_ssmith on Fri Mar 14 02:59PMyehia18 i wasn't kissing their ass, just pointing out that if they did take offence then fair enough, it's only right to apologise. Personally, i think that the whole "life ban" thing was a joke unless i grossly underestimated ED's sense of humour.
But hey, i didn't get the middle name "Brown Tongue" for nothing you know..........
I don't know what it is about Frank Lampard but i just CAN'T like him no matter what he does. He's just got one of those very punchable faces along with: Wayne Rooney, Paul Scholes, John Terry, Barry Ferguson, Cashley Dole, Thomas Gravesen, Stephen Pearson, Rio Ferdinand, heck even my own team's Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink is in the list that is very long. There's a topic for you; Most Punchable Face in Football?
From kevmun82 on Fri Mar 14 03:17PMre post 47
Easy - Christiano Ronaldo if I'm not mistaken
From g_hine on Fri Mar 14 03:24PMIn addition to the nipple-tweaking ref Lampwick and the other player seem to be engaged in a hissy slapping spat. No doubt it all ended in tears. Let's be really serious. Who is the worst dressed manager?
From james_ssmith on Fri Mar 14 03:53PMJimmy Bullard
From andyjlotay on Fri Mar 14 04:29PMFor me, there are a couple of underrated players in the prem at the min, Arteta stands out as one, along with Patrice Evra; the guy was a breathe of fresh air in the left back position and replaced uniteds player of the season, Heinze.
As for fat Frank Lampard, not only is he one of the mpst overrated players ever to play football (the fact there is a debate about whether he is or isnt is quite frankly ridiculous - see what i did there!) he is also one of the luckiest players ever to play football. How a person with such little obvious talent got to be a England reg is remarkable. I suppose that is his biggest asset; his ability to a@#$%ve alot with @#$% all!
Of course the fat shit is gonna have plenty of goals every season, if the only thing i did when i played was stand outside the box scratchin until the ball came my way and then scuffed a shot somewhere toward the goal i'm sure id end up with a similar goal tally. Actually i probably also need to be wearing a pair of horse shoes in my boots too to! I still havnt watched a Lampard play a match where i have said at the end of the game, 'fair enough, he played well there' and i bloody watched the derby game!! Check out some of the stats for the world cup regarding fat Frank, tournament where he is up against good players; its laughable he still is selected for England!From cmcmulkin01 on Fri Mar 14 05:01PMno one will back me on this, i'm sure, but jermaine pennant is fairly underrated.
widely regarded as liverpool's standout during the cl final against milan last year--if i can recall, eurosport mentioned this as well. he's quick, will run at any back-four, good crosser of the ball. he's got quality but the rotation system that rafa's been (ab)using certainly isn't helping him get the games he needs.
he's done well to shelve the off-field troubles as well. he's got class.
From parasolspins_bye on Fri Mar 14 05:21PMlooking at you main pic as the ref grabs mans franks man boobs richards comes racing in to tell him brace your self fat piggy boy
From coe606 on Fri Mar 14 11:31PMFollowing ED's standards, Boro players are the most underrated. For good reason.
From general_ashworm on Sat Mar 15 06:20AMFrank has scored many goals but how many of them have been decisive. I can only remember his goal against Barca. Banging four goals against unknown teams doesnt make him an outstanding player. He doesnt stand out on big occations neither for England nor for Chelsea. To me he is just another player and should stop thinking about 130,000 pounds per week but about how to win titles.
From richardritam on Sat Mar 15 08:25AMsuper frank is the nearest there is in the current game to johnny giles, the father of class midfield play; he has better vision than gerrard but lacks gerrard's ability to inspire; both can and often do make the telling pass, the ultimate success of which is largely affected by the intended recipient's ability, which is why both of them often look less good in england strip than in their club strip where they typically have (foreign) players better able to read their game and technically better at making good with the opportunities their perceptive passes offer; i would love to see either of them playing with bergatov in the side; most underrated, i would go for arteta - he quietly transforms the everton side from good/ordinary towards splendid when he plays
From c.hawcroft on Sat Mar 15 11:03AMSorry but no one has actualy mentioned the most underated player in the prem. Its gotta be Jamie O'Hara
From cpgratton.29 on Sat Mar 15 06:59PMif only early doors did mugs i would buy one
From stephann009 on Sun Mar 16 02:43PMwhy does nobody mention Nani, everyone goes on about Ronaldo, Nani is far better has the skill and is a team player. And Evra, fantastic and shines no Heinz has gone
From dhall905 on Thu Mar 20 11:45PM
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