Transfer tinderbox
Wed Jul 16 09:01AM
If the 2008 Premier League summer transfer window was a party, it would be decidedly teenage.
While most of the clubs content themselves with coy glances and occasional hand-holding, only Spurs, Arsenal and Chelsea have taken anyone behind the bike sheds for some full on heavy petting, but none of them have come close to going all the way.
Portsmouth and Bolton have managed a couple of clumsy snogs each, posh kids Manchester United are indignantly swatting away the attentions of the tirelessly eager Spanish exchange student and West Brom are getting stick from pretty much everyone in sight for pulling a couple of mingers that no-one else would go anywhere near.
But with the window stretching before us like a row of spotty chess enthusiasts desperate for a dance, Early Doors can exclusively reveal the identity of the cupid we've all been waiting for.
It's Rafael Benitez.
The Liverpool manager clearly wants to sign Aston Villa captain Gareth Barry and can obviously afford him, but is stubbornly refusing to meet Villa's £18 million valuation, much as he stubbornly refuses to see that his goatee makes him look like a steretypically gregarious kebab shop owner.
Reds fans may bleat about the lack of money their club has compared to Chelsea and Manchester United, but they have spent only £30 million less than United over the past five seasons, and a club that splashed in the region of £40 million on Fernando Torres, Ryan Babel, Yossi Benayoun and Lucas Leiva last summer is hardly up against it.
And - as ED is shrewdly about to demonstrate - if the Barry deal goes ahead it could prove the catalyst for a chain reaction of big-money transfers in the Premier League.
With £18 million in the bank from the Barry sale, Villa boss Martin O'Neill will be able to land Blackburn wide boy David Bentley, prompting Chelsea winger Shaun Wright-Phillips to push through a move to Portsmouth so as not to let his England colleague steal a march on him on the international scene.
Chelsea aren't exactly short of a few bob, but the money they'll get from the Wright-Phillips transfer will enable Roman Abramovich to take Robinho off Real Madrid's hands and give new coach Big Phil Scolari yet another temperamental attacking midfielder to cram into his starting XI.
Frustrated by the Brazilian's incessant step-overs using up all the available time for deflected half-volleys from the edge of the penalty area, Frank Lampard will high-tail it to Internazionale, where former boss Jose Mourinho will give him a big cuddle and promise him that Inter's attacking football will revolve around the sole aim of setting up Lampard for scuffed long-rangers from wherever he happens to find himself on the pitch.
With Ronaldinho expected to complete his move from Barcelona to Milan at any moment, the Catalan club will use the cash to bring in Emmanuel Adebayor from Arsenal, thereby forcing the Gunners into the transfer market in search of a striker.
Alexander Hleb's likely Emirates exit will heap even further pressure on Arsene Wenger to bring in a big-name signing to appease the fans, and with any one of Roque Santa Cruz, Klaas-Jan Huntelaar and Andrei Arshavin set to arrive at the club, Spurs will be stung into action by the sight of their hated rivals splashing the cash in uncharacteristically wanton fashion, bringing Espanyol striker Luis Garcia to White Hart Lane and subsequently facilitating Dimitar Berbatov's transfer to Manchester United.
And with three and a half world class strikers in their squad (balsa-limbed Louis Saha being the half, obviously) United will realise that they don't really need Cristiano Ronaldo after all, and will ease him out of his shackles before plonking him on the first plane to Madrid, thereby bringing to a close the most exciting summer transfer window in living memory.
So if none of this happens, it is demonstrably and unequivocally Benitez's fault. You heard it here first.
- - -
Early Doors is sorry, but £48 million for Robinho? Forty-eight million pounds, for Robinho?
Zinedine Zidane, you may recall, cost £46 million, but Zidane won one World Cup, one European Championship, one European Cup, three league titles and three World Player of the Year Awards, single-handedly dragged a clearly past-it France side to the final of the last World Cup and played football of a beauty that made grown men weep.
The highlight of Robinho's career, by contrast, is probably still the seven stepovers 'n' penalty-winning dive combo he produced in a Brazilian championship decider while playing for Santos in 2002, and despite a thrilling burst of form at the beginning of last season he's yet to convince anyone that he's anything more than an indulgent tricks merchant with a cheeky grin and a commendable dedication to safe sex (he reportedly once asked a nightclub security man to bring him 40 condoms).
If Robinho is worth £48 million then Cristiano Ronaldo has to be worth about £70 million, and ED itself is probably worth somewhere around the £7.5 million mark, despite being a well-worn breakfast-time blog rather than an actual football player.
- - -
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "Today's question: does Rob Wotton ever smile?" Sky Sports News presenter Mike Wedderburn after announcing the channel's presenting line-up for the morning, thereby providing a tantalising glimpse of the thinly disguised torrent of jealous hatred running through the dressing rooms at Sky Sports News HQ.
TALKING POINT: There were 586 comments on ED yesterday, 56 of which were actually about football and 12 of which contributed something worthwhile to the discussion, thanks largely to the shameless nerds who dominate the comments section every day with their stupendously self-interested twaddle.
Highlights from our laziest footballer ever topic, though, included chrisnewman950's verdict on Oliver Kahn, who "just used to stand there watching the game", while adschoey nominated Ray Wilkins for his commitment to sideways passing.
Today: Who is the most over-rated player in football history?
COMING UP: After a rest day yesterday those gristly-thighed, testicularly-discomfited cyclists from the Tour de France are back in action, and you can follow live coverage of their travails from 11:45 BST.
The most over-rated player in football history hs got to be Pele. There is no way he scored over 1000 career goals unless beach football & goals against his kids were counted. He also know nothing about football- tipping Colombia to win the World Cup, predicting African football to eclipse the rest of the world by 2000, rating Nicky Butt as his player of the tournament in Japan/Korea and recently saying he thought Stoke would avoid relegation. I'd still have him and his viagra over Mama Sidibe though
From chrisnewman950 on Wed Jul 16 09:48AMPls discount whatever Pele says his comments on football are like thus of Lothar Matheus during Euro2008 off target.
From ziaddina on Wed Jul 16 09:49AMI used to think Scholes was over-rated when he was starting out, but I was wrong.
From daveloweuk on Wed Jul 16 09:56AMgood morning fellow bloggers.I think Nicholas Anelka is way far overrated.He just doesn't seem to prove his worth after leaving arsenal where he was virtually fed with balls by the very energetic Viera.I guess he is very much the most overrated player in footballing history
From jacknfor on Wed Jul 16 10:01AMEnglish players work extra in the league bcoz of the quality that foreign players bring. when they get 2gether, this is not required bcoz rooney has only owen and (ahem) bent for competition, not tevez and/or ronaldo. so they are over rated....
From lifeisblu on Wed Jul 16 10:01AMHow can a man who gets man of the match in a world cup final when he was 17 be over-rated
From devincork on Wed Jul 16 10:03AMItandje..... Just sold for 2.5 million. I wouldn't of paid £2.50 for him!
From gemma.lornie on Wed Jul 16 10:03AMjude_surf, surely you are not letting turtleman111 take your record of 'sucks'!!! show him that you 'suck' more n im
From lifeisblu on Wed Jul 16 10:04AMi agree with jcpotvin, 18 mill is ridiculous money for Barry, its not that we don't have the money for him, its that he isnt worth 18mill, simple as that. why should we fork out for him when he isnt worth that much money? Villa are being greedy and if they want to keep him that much, we'll keep our money - and everyones happy.
From x_nickichicken_x on Wed Jul 16 10:05AMAdebayor is overrated. Without the near-perfect midfield behind him he is nothing.
From tompuntcom on Wed Jul 16 10:05AMRobinho is not worth even 25 million pounds.He still has to prove what he can do.He hasn't cut through even in real,he may even fall into the category of overrated players.Benitez to my by refusing the 18 million pounds tag on Barry is just trying to say he isn't that so much desired and is not worth that amount.
From jacknfor on Wed Jul 16 10:06AMand wat else has that man done since he was 17? except to be slashed by the same english media that propped his meagre abilities!! wat happened wen hed ronaldo luiz nazario de lima, raul, robinho, et al for competetion? I will tel you..he had to pack his bags and mix it up with shola ameobi, martins, dyer and such other mediocre like! over rated? mos def!!!!!!!!
From lifeisblu on Wed Jul 16 10:09AMThe legend of Pele is the over-rated bit. Like the way the media report everything he says as if it is a rare pearl of wisdom. Pele says whatever he thinks is audience wants to hear. If he went to Uzbekistan he'd tip them to win the World Cup
From chrisnewman950 on Wed Jul 16 10:11AMMost overrated player: titus bramble
Most underrated player: titus bramble
C'mon he's better than crissy ronaldo at the back.
You all suck! there, i said it!From devil.hahh on Wed Jul 16 10:11AMAndrea Silenzi at Notts Forest in the 90s - he wasnt much good as I remember but came with a press hype of top international striker!
From ian.lapsley on Wed Jul 16 10:12AMYes, Adebayor is overrated!! It's Fabregas, Hleb and Flamini making him look good. In exactly the same way, I have to say that Ronaldo is also overrated. He's a very good player, but not the superstar many makes him out to be. Take away Rooney, Tevez, Scholes etc he would be just another good player who can do seven step-overs and hit a few free-kicks...
From jcverm on Wed Jul 16 10:15AMhow about pele. Does anyone believe that if he had played today he would have scored as many goals? plus probably %30 of his goals are from friendlies and when he was a schollboy. if that counts then im probably at about 250 (random kickabouts included)
From arsenal878787 on Wed Jul 16 10:17AMI'm a Man United fan, and Nani is over-rated. (Not as over-rated as Fat Frank though!!!)
From antonyslack on Wed Jul 16 10:17AMOverrated? Francis Lee - Overweight, Unfit, Dodgy Hair....... hang on he'd be worth billions these days (wit ha Mna Utd shirt on)
From stephenryan2004 on Wed Jul 16 10:19AMjohn bloody hartson - just a blob
From dominic_more on Wed Jul 16 10:22AMpelé as the most overrated? that's a bit of a reach. the goal tally wouldn't have translated in a european league, but i question why everyone is so harsh towards a league that boasted most of the players that won three of four world cups in rather spectacular fashion. every club in europe is signing just about any brazilian teenager without jaundice or polio, but that wasn't the case then, the domestic league was much stronger than it is today, it's somewhat eurocentric to assume those leagues were dodgy. maybe he couldn't have dominated the top leagues, but he sure looked good against all those other countries in the world cup, surely that has to count for something. in a culture where lionel messi is anointed top three player in the world with no contributions to a trophy, zero meaningful goals and the health record of a retired coal miner, how can we single out a guy who performed about as well as anyone on the biggest stage, the final ~ a place a lot of would-be legends fell apart?
From jcpotvin on Wed Jul 16 10:22AMNO WAY! Adebayor is not overrated, if anything he is underrated! Scores 30 goals last season and some of u guys blame it on the midfield, what about torres and how many gerrard set up for him.
From jay8my on Wed Jul 16 10:22AMoverated players?
ibra-diddy-vich takes the prize for that one, closely followed by franceso totti.
barry ferguson deserves a mention as well.
From marcgrant7 on Wed Jul 16 10:23AMMost overrated player i have seen in the flesh is shevchenko what has he done at chelsea to justify his £30million price tag????
From jay8my on Wed Jul 16 10:23AMThe most over-rated player in history? Step forward Steven Gerrard, or to the scum that are the scousee (yes you are scum) Stevie G. Never has one man clung onto glory in a mediocre team while diving at every opportunity for so long.
From rag2706 on Wed Jul 16 10:26AMVilla is paying Pool for also over pricing their players, imagine Pool rating Scot Carson 10m then weeks later agreeing to sell for 4m! Villa have the right to price Barry that high i hope another team comes and @#$% him under Pool's nose
From ziaddina on Wed Jul 16 10:29AMyes, nicki, we need to keep that money for david villa, david silva, david bentley, anyone named david (though not hasselhoff). i thought we'd have a little more in the transfer kitty, what with getting off the hook for harry kewell's medical expenses, but so far all we've got is an italian back nobody's heard of and a swiss back nobody wants.
From jcpotvin on Wed Jul 16 10:30AMjcpotvin I agree with you about the Brazillian league being unfairly written off. Apart from providing the world with some of the best players (including Pele it's the whole Pele legend thing I think is overhyped) the Brazillian teams usually give top European teams a real test. I remember Man United being totally outplayed by Edumundo & Corinthians (?) in the World Club Cup a few years back. Be nice to see more South America v Europe games
From chrisnewman950 on Wed Jul 16 10:31AMOh yeah b4 i forget, got to mention Veron, was good but REALLY wasn't THAT good!
From jay8my on Wed Jul 16 10:32AMMost overrated player:
NUNO GOMES (BENFICA / PORTUGAL) -how can a country with so many talented players not come up with a better striker then this joke???!!!He's usually a greater help to the opposition...
From bryanfage on Wed Jul 16 10:34AM
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