Early Doors - Your morning briefing blog

Football's Twitterati

Fri Jun 26 08:53AM

It might just be texting on the internet, and it is most definitely baffling to anyone born before 1990, but Twitter is huge.

It played a prominent role in recent protests about the Iranian election, and it is how many people heard the news of Michael Jackson's death.

Several papers lead this morning with the fact that the Queen sent Andy Murray a letter of congratulation for winning the tennis tournament named after her.

That little nugget of 'news' came straight from Murray's Twitter account, although oddly none of the tabloids have picked up on the 'tennis player-snack name game' he has been playing since his straight-sets win against Ernests Gulbis.

Murray's suggestions: John MacEnrolo, Cod woodbridge, mardy fishcakes, prawn borg, martina haggis, mince spadea, egg rusedski, spotted dick Norman, Juan martin del popcorn, vania kingsize mars bar, gilles muller fruit corner. Novak Yorkie-ovic.

Serena Williams's page provides high comedy, not least in the following eight-stage rant about rules in the Wimbledon locker room.

'Hey! So, let's talk about Rules at the workplace, Rules that do NOT make sense! 1:24 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'There is a NEW rule at the tournament that I disagree with so I want to hold an open conversation about "Rules that do NOT make sense." 1:29 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'So, I am not pleased with this NO EATING in the Locker Room Rule. I was informed before my match that I can NOT eat in the locker room, now! 1:35 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'What doesn't make sense is that there was a lady placing bananas & health bars out for myself & the other players. How much sense does make? 1:38 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'Do you guys think I'm wrong for being upset with this new rule? 1:40 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'I will be posting a new blog on my website shortly for more details on the "No Eating in the Locker Room Rule." 1:49 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'Hey! We are NOT allowed to eat in the locker room but, they are placing bananas KIT KATS out. Now, how do you consume those food items? 12:12 PM Jun 23rd from web'

'If I can't eat in the locker room & those items are edible, I dare to think how I am supposed to "eat," when the rule states, 'No Eating." 12:18 PM Jun 23rd from web'

Even little Laura Robson is involved, while pretty much any news involving Lance Armstrong or Shaquille O'Neal is gleaned from their assorted Tweetings.

Twitter has yet to catch on properly among footballers, for whatever reason - lack of basic literacy, utter disdain for the general public, or perhaps they just don't feel the need to inform the world every time they fart or sneeze.

Anyway, here are some of the best football Twitterers (obviously none of these are verified):

Wayne Rooney: Banters gamely away with the punters but refuses to break ranks when quizzed about United's summer signings. ED likes the bit where he refers to his unborn child as 'it'.

'Yeah thanks for all questions about Coleen she's great baby is due in October and no we don't know what it is but thanks 4 all kind messages. 6:44 AM Jun 15th from Tweetie'

Rio Ferdinand: Simply has to be a genuine account given the exceptional brand of youth textspeak in which his Tweets are written. ED doesn't think the Matt Duke below is the Hull goalkeeper, but you never know. Here's Rio on the Manchester United captaincy:

'@MattDuke7777 cheers 4 the support m8 :P the gaffas give it me a few times already so u never kno but giggsy's doin a gr8 job atm! 12:25 PM Jun 11th from web in reply to MattDuke7777'

Fernando Torres: His impressive English - written in proper words that ED can understand - puts Rio to shame.

'this baby's going to be a kicker!! it's been going day long. :) happy sharing this with you, sorry for not replying to all, goodnight. 4:19 PM Jun 8th from web'

Peter Crouch: Only ever used Twitter on April 1, and showed exactly why he is much more of a celebrity than he has any right to be. Made six tweets, five of them to other celebs: Sugababe Keisha Buchanan, Fearne Cotton, Holly Willoughby, Scott Mills, Comedy Dave.

Cristiano Ronaldo: It really does seem to be him, although it's mostly links to music he likes. Anyway, here's his reaction to the Michael Jackson news:

'RT mitcha o que michael jackson falou quando chegou no ceu? R: Deixa eu ver esse menino jesus! about 5 hours ago from web'

Ryan Giggs: Full of random details, consequently a good read. Includes a review of The Hangover - "What a funny film, I would say stepbrothers is funnier though."

'I'm getting the train now with the Neville brothers. 7:28 AM May 20th from TweetDeck'

Carlos Tevez: Another one not in English, for obvious reasons. ED notes that Tevez is following Fidel Castro, and that on June 11 he pondered: "Which club will I go to?"

Jonathan Woodgate: Hardly prolific but there is a certain charm to his mini-anecdotes about visiting the dentist and showing his mum how to use YouTube.

Steven Gerrard: Frighteningly dull. None of the day-to-day minutiae that make Twitter fun. Just infrequent, platitudinous rubbish.

Others on Twitter:

Brad Guzan

Darren Fletcher (complete with self-deprecating URL)

Frank Lampard

Rohan Ricketts

Danny Dichio

- - -

QUOTE OF THE DAY: "So, for anyone who is unclear or may have misunderstood what my position is, let me make myself absolutely crystal clear. I am wholeheartedly committed to Arsenal and my future lies with this great club." ED has a funny feeling this quote from Cesc Fabregas is going to look very silly before too long.

FOREIGN VIEW: Indian officials were left red-faced when 16 of the 30 boys selected for a training camp for the Asian under-16 championships qualifiers were found to be overaged.

The problem was exposed when the players underwent MRI tests in Goa, the Times of India reported on Thursday.

"We are aware of the MRI results, but we are re-enquiring with state associations," All India Football Federation general secretary Alberto Colaco told the paper. "We are investigating at the moment."

COMING UP: A double bill of Euro U21 semi-finals. First up is England v Sweden at 17:00 UK time, then Italy v Germany at 19:45.

- - -

RIP Michael Jackson

Comments31 - 60 of 315
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#24 - lol
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 09:32AM
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29.Kev, And in danger of boring through to the centre of the earth.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 09:34AM
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THAT MICHEAL JACKSON
I ALWAYS LIKED THE LITTLE BLACK ONE
BUT I WAS NOT AT ALL KEEN ON THE WHITE FELLA
HE WAS A PRANCING PEADO
ITS AMAZING HOW MANY PEOPLE ACTUALLY LIKE PRANCING PEADOS
MAYBE THE YANKS WILL HAVE IT AS A SPORT AT THE NEXT OLYMPICS
SHAMON
From toplfcfan on Fri Jun 26 09:36AM
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32. LMAO Best of the month!
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 09:36AM
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I DINNAE DO TWATTAR, FACE BOK, BEEBO UR ONY A THOT SHIITE. THAS
SECIAL NATWARKAN HOS GOT OOT TA FACKUN HOND.
From donneybye on Fri Jun 26 09:39AM
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36. All those little hobbits meeting a masked 'Strider' at the sign of the Prancing Paedo. Oh Sam!!!
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 09:39AM
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A SAMETEEMS DO THOT 2ND LEEF S HAT WATH WEE ANNE. NAY NAY ATS CALED IMVU.
From donneybye on Fri Jun 26 09:40AM
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Irony that he died on the same day as Farah Fawcett, she played with Majors he played.......
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 09:40AM
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39 - Ha ha ha ha. Nice one James. And stuill the tributes rooll in. McDonalds have announced the JacksonBurger. 50yr old meat between 10yr old buns.
From danny_saks on Fri Jun 26 09:41AM
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A SAY, AT WIL BE A BAG FOONERAL.
From donneybye on Fri Jun 26 09:42AM
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41 - LOL Andy. Thats just the thing isn't it? His death will overshadow hers today.
From danny_saks on Fri Jun 26 09:43AM
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Things that would have made a better article than this:
1 - Brazil beating SA in the last few mins to make the final of confederations cup.
2 - Proposals which would force Sky to wholesale sports channels to competitors.
3 - Leadup to the U-21 semi finals tonight (Eng vs Swe, Ita vs Ger).
4 - Analysis on Citys spending frenzy - will they be good enough?
5 - Why Chelsea and Man Utd can't attract any players?
6 - Liverpool/Everton groundshare proposals.
Clearly you need the help...
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 09:43AM
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DE YE REMOMBAR HE NEER DRAPPED HES BABAY OOT THA WINDAE.
From donneybye on Fri Jun 26 09:44AM
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Whats the difference betwee MJ and SAF?
SAF will be playing giggs in August
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 09:44AM
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The heart attack is thought to have come from his pro testant fathers side of the family, it was the Billy Gene!!
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 09:45AM
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THON TOPLFC BYE AS WAN RASCAST FACKAR. OND HES A SCOOSAR OSWEEL. FACK ME HE MAST BAY A HARRABOL ANDIVIDAUL.
From donneybye on Fri Jun 26 09:47AM
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47 - oh Andy... see 15... You did it again!
From danny_saks on Fri Jun 26 09:47AM
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Its my refreshers, they ain't what they used to be!!
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 09:50AM
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I guess ED is facing recession.....nothing good to talk about
From welbem on Fri Jun 26 09:51AM
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YEES UR AL TARRABOL SCRUEL TAY OWLED JECKO. HOV SAM RASPACT FAR THA PEEDO WAD YEES. REET IM AF TAY GET A BAT A KAP. A WASH OPP AL NEET WETCHAN THA TELEBAX. BAY BAY.
From donneybye on Fri Jun 26 09:52AM
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ED must be going through a recession....... nothing good to talk about
From welbem on Fri Jun 26 09:54AM
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45. I'm willing to discuss Everton and Liverpool ground sharing proposals anywhere, any time with anyone. Five seconds later we can talk about something else.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:04AM
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Poor effort this morning, worst ED I have read in years.
"giggsy's doin a gr8 job atm!" I thought atm was an acroym used in the porn industry for @#$% to mouth.......eeer giggsy! whats been going off in the Man u dressing room.
From cansofswine on Fri Jun 26 10:06AM
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45 - Johnny, as for your point number 5, does anyone else get the impression that there is a concerted efforst amongst quite a few people to make sure the Prem isn't as dominant as it has been of late?
From danny_saks on Fri Jun 26 10:09AM
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# 56 you prove my point. It's controvertial, and provokes debate. Even if you disagree with it, you would have to have a preferred option (which you could voice), and that is exactly the kind of dicsussion this comments section should have. Everton have to do one of the three options (repair/improvement, new ground or ground share).
Having said that, I wouldn't want to interrupt the lengthy debates over the twitter schenanigans.
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 10:10AM
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Cheeky so and so... I was born in 1970... Yeah that's right, I'm 38 yrs old, and I certainly don't find it baffling... The phrase "piece of cake" springs to mind!!!
From capt.picard on Fri Jun 26 10:12AM
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For those who are making fun of Michael Jackson's death, you are f**king shallow, brainless -and most of all- silly tw*ats
From fady.incrediblehulk on Fri Jun 26 10:12AM
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#58 - I'm not sure. My over-riding perception is that the Premier League has ironically become too good. The way I see it, there are now 5 clubs in the Premier League who expect to win trophies (Man U, Chelsea, Liverpool, Arsenal and Man City). In order to do that, all 5 clubs sell the prospect of winning to lure big players to their clubs. The problem is, because the standard is so high, 3/4 of the 5 teams, full of star players, will end up disappointed, and that will inevitably lead to some of them leaving. Fabregas' comments yesterday are a great example of that. Essentially, the number of trophies can only realistically sustain the ambitions of a couple of big clubs, so something has to give. I have a feeling that in the next 1-3 seasons, Man City will make the top 4 at the expense of Arsenal/Chelsea and that will lead to a mass exodus of players from that clubs abroad. Even if the Premier League is the best league, no star players want to fight for 4th place, they would much rather fight for 1st in the Italian/Spanish/German league.
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 10:16AM
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59 We do tak about football issues, but we aren't nerds about it. If there is something more spicy then we all flock 'twittering' to it. This a space where I can pretend to be bird-brained and maybe a nice little sparrow will settle just within reach of a paw and a pounce.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:18AM
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62. As I observed earlier Man Utd haven't weakened their defence. Arsenal have strengthened theirs. I expect a two horse race. Defences win the haul to major trophies - rule number 1 of football management.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:22AM
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