Early Doors - Your morning briefing blog

Football's Twitterati

Fri Jun 26 08:53AM

It might just be texting on the internet, and it is most definitely baffling to anyone born before 1990, but Twitter is huge.

It played a prominent role in recent protests about the Iranian election, and it is how many people heard the news of Michael Jackson's death.

Several papers lead this morning with the fact that the Queen sent Andy Murray a letter of congratulation for winning the tennis tournament named after her.

That little nugget of 'news' came straight from Murray's Twitter account, although oddly none of the tabloids have picked up on the 'tennis player-snack name game' he has been playing since his straight-sets win against Ernests Gulbis.

Murray's suggestions: John MacEnrolo, Cod woodbridge, mardy fishcakes, prawn borg, martina haggis, mince spadea, egg rusedski, spotted dick Norman, Juan martin del popcorn, vania kingsize mars bar, gilles muller fruit corner. Novak Yorkie-ovic.

Serena Williams's page provides high comedy, not least in the following eight-stage rant about rules in the Wimbledon locker room.

'Hey! So, let's talk about Rules at the workplace, Rules that do NOT make sense! 1:24 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'There is a NEW rule at the tournament that I disagree with so I want to hold an open conversation about "Rules that do NOT make sense." 1:29 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'So, I am not pleased with this NO EATING in the Locker Room Rule. I was informed before my match that I can NOT eat in the locker room, now! 1:35 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'What doesn't make sense is that there was a lady placing bananas & health bars out for myself & the other players. How much sense does make? 1:38 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'Do you guys think I'm wrong for being upset with this new rule? 1:40 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'I will be posting a new blog on my website shortly for more details on the "No Eating in the Locker Room Rule." 1:49 PM Jun 22nd from web'

'Hey! We are NOT allowed to eat in the locker room but, they are placing bananas KIT KATS out. Now, how do you consume those food items? 12:12 PM Jun 23rd from web'

'If I can't eat in the locker room & those items are edible, I dare to think how I am supposed to "eat," when the rule states, 'No Eating." 12:18 PM Jun 23rd from web'

Even little Laura Robson is involved, while pretty much any news involving Lance Armstrong or Shaquille O'Neal is gleaned from their assorted Tweetings.

Twitter has yet to catch on properly among footballers, for whatever reason - lack of basic literacy, utter disdain for the general public, or perhaps they just don't feel the need to inform the world every time they fart or sneeze.

Anyway, here are some of the best football Twitterers (obviously none of these are verified):

Wayne Rooney: Banters gamely away with the punters but refuses to break ranks when quizzed about United's summer signings. ED likes the bit where he refers to his unborn child as 'it'.

'Yeah thanks for all questions about Coleen she's great baby is due in October and no we don't know what it is but thanks 4 all kind messages. 6:44 AM Jun 15th from Tweetie'

Rio Ferdinand: Simply has to be a genuine account given the exceptional brand of youth textspeak in which his Tweets are written. ED doesn't think the Matt Duke below is the Hull goalkeeper, but you never know. Here's Rio on the Manchester United captaincy:

'@MattDuke7777 cheers 4 the support m8 :P the gaffas give it me a few times already so u never kno but giggsy's doin a gr8 job atm! 12:25 PM Jun 11th from web in reply to MattDuke7777'

Fernando Torres: His impressive English - written in proper words that ED can understand - puts Rio to shame.

'this baby's going to be a kicker!! it's been going day long. :) happy sharing this with you, sorry for not replying to all, goodnight. 4:19 PM Jun 8th from web'

Peter Crouch: Only ever used Twitter on April 1, and showed exactly why he is much more of a celebrity than he has any right to be. Made six tweets, five of them to other celebs: Sugababe Keisha Buchanan, Fearne Cotton, Holly Willoughby, Scott Mills, Comedy Dave.

Cristiano Ronaldo: It really does seem to be him, although it's mostly links to music he likes. Anyway, here's his reaction to the Michael Jackson news:

'RT mitcha o que michael jackson falou quando chegou no ceu? R: Deixa eu ver esse menino jesus! about 5 hours ago from web'

Ryan Giggs: Full of random details, consequently a good read. Includes a review of The Hangover - "What a funny film, I would say stepbrothers is funnier though."

'I'm getting the train now with the Neville brothers. 7:28 AM May 20th from TweetDeck'

Carlos Tevez: Another one not in English, for obvious reasons. ED notes that Tevez is following Fidel Castro, and that on June 11 he pondered: "Which club will I go to?"

Jonathan Woodgate: Hardly prolific but there is a certain charm to his mini-anecdotes about visiting the dentist and showing his mum how to use YouTube.

Steven Gerrard: Frighteningly dull. None of the day-to-day minutiae that make Twitter fun. Just infrequent, platitudinous rubbish.

Others on Twitter:

Brad Guzan

Darren Fletcher (complete with self-deprecating URL)

Frank Lampard

Rohan Ricketts

Danny Dichio

- - -

QUOTE OF THE DAY: "So, for anyone who is unclear or may have misunderstood what my position is, let me make myself absolutely crystal clear. I am wholeheartedly committed to Arsenal and my future lies with this great club." ED has a funny feeling this quote from Cesc Fabregas is going to look very silly before too long.

FOREIGN VIEW: Indian officials were left red-faced when 16 of the 30 boys selected for a training camp for the Asian under-16 championships qualifiers were found to be overaged.

The problem was exposed when the players underwent MRI tests in Goa, the Times of India reported on Thursday.

"We are aware of the MRI results, but we are re-enquiring with state associations," All India Football Federation general secretary Alberto Colaco told the paper. "We are investigating at the moment."

COMING UP: A double bill of Euro U21 semi-finals. First up is England v Sweden at 17:00 UK time, then Italy v Germany at 19:45.

- - -

RIP Michael Jackson

Comments61 - 90 of 316
First
Previous
1
2
3
4
5
6
Next
Last

62. As I observed earlier Man Utd haven't weakened their defence. Arsenal have strengthened theirs. I expect a two horse race. Defences win the haul to major trophies - rule number 1 of football management.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:22AM
Report abuse
64 - well said. On the one hand, loss of a music legend. On the other, another filthy paedo off the streets. Ying and Yang, Good and Bad, Pain and Pleasure. What goes around comes around. Etc.
From danny_saks on Fri Jun 26 10:23AM
Report abuse
Johhny, nice analysis there mate. I was keeping to my usual shallow self and thinking more of it as a meeting of dirty Spaniards round the back of the bike sheds pooling their money together to buy all the talent up to feck up the English.
From danny_saks on Fri Jun 26 10:26AM
Report abuse
66. Finished servicing Nick Griffin? Back in your trunk, I'll be round to collect my share of the takings later.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:28AM
Report abuse
#65 - the best defence in the Premier League last season was a tie between Chelsea & Manchester United. Chelsea finished third. You base your 'two-horse-race' argument purely on defence? Well I just disproved it. Even championship winning defence is not good enough without the right firepower and right results.
By the way, even if you were right about it being Arsenal or ManU next season (which I think is ridiculous, by the way), all of my points would still stand. In that scenario, Chelsea & Liverpool players would become unhappy at not winning and could potentially leave to play in other leagues.
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 10:30AM
Report abuse
Gillian be more desperate for my attention
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 10:32AM
Report abuse
70. A good argument although if players have been at a club for 3 or 4 years and not quite won anything doesn't this affect their market value and possibly their self-belief?
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:36AM
Report abuse
As for players leaving when they have 'won everything' with a club what happens afterwards. Overmars and Petit are good examples of footballing careers never being as quite as good.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:38AM
Report abuse
Got to go. Hope to blog on Tuesday or Wednesday.
From james_ssmith on Fri Jun 26 10:40AM
Report abuse
Johnny sure the Prem is the best league but thats only because of the workrate and organisation of its top teams. When Barca got it right, they wiped the floor with everyone. Having 4-5 teams competing can only be good. Good for players, teams, fans etc. But all players would have dreamed of certain teams when they were young. Players from southern europe have generally looked at and wanted to play for the big Spanish / Italian teams. Players from northern europe go for the Prem. The italian / german / french league have deteriorated so much that they best players really only have La Liga or the Prem to choose from. They both offer great money although the 50% tax rate is a factor. The weak teams in Spain play open expansive football and are the dream opposition for the creative players at the
top spanish teams. That’s why I see more creative players continuing to choose spain. But that’s also why they struggle when they meet the workrate and organisation of Prem teams as they rarely see it at home.
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 10:41AM
Report abuse
62- A bit highbrow there Johnny, Sounds like you're planning Jim White's next article. No one wants to finish second every time, they want something to put in the trophy cupboard.
A Domestic Treble (Carling, FA and EPL title) can be easily locked down by the same 1 or 2 teams.
Thankfully, I have devised a solution, inspired by our nation's schools.More meaningless trophies and medals.
Fictitious trophies for a real sense of achievement. Egg and Spoon Race, Three-legged and the Dad-race. And give everyone trophies just like at sports day when you were 7. Sure Gerrard hasn't won the EPL yet, but think of all the milk bottle caps he would've collected with his steely determination and keen balance with an egg and spoon.
Alternatively, is there a PFA award for random stats? ... distance covered in a season, pass completion, Yards stolen from free kicks and throw ins... Biggest whine. Most featured in Bizarre. Would make it far more interesting than just a player of the year award.
From mwstraight on Fri Jun 26 11:05AM
Report abuse
lol was it such a good point that there's no comeback
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 11:07AM
Report abuse
its bad to say to the dead but GOOD RIDDANCE TO THE WANNABE. why chenge your colour and 'sharpen' your nose just to be white - A POPULAR VIEW FROM AFRICA.
From kaggwa2000 on Fri Jun 26 11:25AM
Report abuse
NO. 45 why not apply for a job and Eurosport??? of course no one will read you boring stuff and you would be sacked in a week!
From kaggwa2000 on Fri Jun 26 11:30AM
Report abuse
jarvis_daan 'Mitch the RT Michael Jackson said that when he arrived in heaven? A: Let me see that baby jesus
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 11:36AM
Report abuse
#76 & 78 - I think most people would agree with you. Obviously players have childhood dreams and would like to play in those leagues. I also think you are right in that Spanish teams play more openly and are therefore more vulnerable, and that may be part of the reason why the EPL is the best. I think the bigger factor is the 50% tax (as you mentioned) and the weather though, to be honest, as well as my point that they have better chance of winning titles joining 1 of 2 top sides rather than 1 of 5 in the EPL. All in all, I don't think anything you said went against anything I said, I agree with it.
#80 - because my talent is better used elsewhere, allowing me to earn more than any journalist .
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 11:40AM
Report abuse
RIP easy as 1 2 3
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 11:48AM
Report abuse
no 81 very simple - i am going to madrid just to get their money but i dont expexct to win any trophies- i pray this happens in the name of jesus
From kaggwa2000 on Fri Jun 26 11:48AM
Report abuse
Jacko has died, what colour to be confirmed
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 11:48AM
Report abuse
Thanks Johnny can I have your autograph now
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 11:51AM
Report abuse
Can I just be clear I did not make a MJ joke my post was a direct translation of what ED put under C Ronaldo's Twitter in the article above!!!!!
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 11:52AM
Report abuse
81-Roughly as follows. I went to the ladygarden but it held no interest for me, I called some photograpers and they pictured me leaving and kissing the girl goodbye.
One day I will be free to express myself and sing Judy Garland songs after I score a goal.
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 11:53AM
Report abuse
83 Johnny - I guess the question remaining is, Man Utd have at least 80m to spend but cant seem to spend. Chelsea too seem to have big money but cant attract the players they want. If the summer goes by without big Prem signings, then this could be the year when the balance of power slips back to Spain.
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 11:58AM
Report abuse
Top of the Page and having a giraffe
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 12:11PM
Report abuse
Anne - 90 - you mean Liverpool could actuall win something?
From doobie.doobiedoo on Fri Jun 26 12:14PM
Report abuse
#90 Well, it's certainly possible. However, Man Utd are consistently in or around the final stages of the CL and near/at the top of the Prem, so I would be very surprised should they not make a couple of key signings. I also think that even if they don't, they will still be the team to beat (apart from maybe Barcelona) in the CL. Having said that, there is an argument that the balance has already swung in Spains favour, especially given how comprehensively outplayed united were in the final. I think Spain will have difficulty gaining the strength in depth that the EPL has, it may become top heavy in the same way the Premier League was in the past, with Real & Barca dominating and the others lagging far behind.
From johnnywilkinson on Fri Jun 26 12:22PM
Report abuse
Johnny, the Euro Superleague is closer and maybe more justifiable than ever. Imagine 20 teams from Europe in a proper league. I like the idea. I could explain how it works but I know there'll be more questions than answers
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 12:34PM
Report abuse
The Euro Super League:-
The League has 18-20 teams, like CL with seeding and playoffs etc.
Participants play this tournament instead of their domestic leagues, though they could still play cups.
Play each team home and away (or set up 3-4 central stadiums to play so no home/away advantage)
Top 4 enter 2-leg semi and final playoff.
The worst teams are relegated back to their domestic league where they try to qualify for it again.
From annieh97 on Fri Jun 26 12:43PM
Report abuse
95-Stadium has to be somewhere neutral then, with no teams from that country playing?
Once you have left the FA from whichever country they are gonna tell you to F?@k right off when wanna comeback.
No way is any countrys' FA gonna let you play in their cup but not their league.
Apart from that, blob on!
Lets stay local for local people!!
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 12:49PM
Report abuse
96-What do you mean Footbal Fascist?
From andy_lycett on Fri Jun 26 12:52PM
Report abuse