Early Doors - Your morning briefing blog

Football good, rugby bad

Mon Jun 29 08:59AM

There has been something refreshing about the lack of hysteria surrounding the summer's two international tournaments.

The Confederations Cup and European U21 Championship have been played with the kind of level-headedness Early Doors feared was no longer possible.

Of course every team has wanted to win, but they have played under moderate pressure and without the histrionics that routinely accompany the bigger competitions.

You suspect that if Ivory Coast had been involved in the Confed Cup, Didier Drogba might have described their exit as 'a darned shame' rather than 'a f***ing disgrace'.

As a consequence, the quality of entertainment has been superb in both competitions.

From the moment Brazil's crazy 4-3 win over Egypt set the tournament properly in motion, the Confederations Cup has been a delight, producing goals in abundance and some genuine surprises.

It might owe something to the relative lack of pressure the teams are playing under, or it might be that their heads are already on a sunbed in the Maldives. Whatever the reason, it has been great fun. Shame about those bloody horns, though.

Last night's final was an appropriate end, with the USA threatening to follow up their win against Spain with another shock, before Brazil's quality eventually told.

Lucio's winner allowed him to show off a t-shirt telling the world that he loves Jesus (why does he only ever do that when he wins something? Did he have a separate t-shirt in case Brazil lost, saying 'Jesus let me down'?).

British people are uncomfortable with public displays of religious faith, but they are ever more common in sport.

Egypt marked each of their goals with a quick prayer, while Pakistan did the same when they won the World Twenty20 cricket.

However, they were upstaged by former skipper Wasim Akram, now in the commentary box.

Despite having no involvement whatsoever in the team's achievement, Wasim chose to dedicate the country's success to 'the brave army of Pakistan' which, while controversial, had the happy side-effect of reducing Nasser Hussain to silence.

England play the U21 final tonight against Germany, a fact that has not escaped the attention of the tabloids.

The Daily Mirror asks with supreme tenuousness: "It's England v Germany in a major final, Labour are clinging on to power and our captain is a West Ham star. Sound familiar?"

Wasn't it also quite warm on the day England won the World Cup? And we were also driving on the left that year. It must be fate...

The Sun, meanwhile, points out that Germany have chosen to wear their red change strip in an attempt to "crank up the mind games".

ED suspects that Britain's middle-aged newspaper men are slightly more obsessed with 1966 than a team of Germans who were born in the late 80s.

England's progress aside, it has still been an excellent tournament.

Early Doors is legitimately infatuated with Sweden striker Marcus Berg, the tournament's top scorer and a player with intelligence, physical presence and a wonderful array of finishes.

His partnership with Ola Toivonen yielded 10 goals in four games and has a touch of Rebrov-Shevchenko about it - Toivonen the deep-lying schemer and Berg the ruthless assassin.

If Early Doors were a team like Everton, it would do everything in its power to sign the pair of them.

Luckily for Everton, ED has no input into their recruitment policy, because if it did, it would be breaking rule one of transfers - never sign a player based on his performance at an international tournament, let alone two. ED calls it 'Poborsky's law'.

And in this case, it might be especially pertinent. Just because you look the part against a bunch of young shavers from Belarus, it doesn't mean you're going to do the business in a midweek trip to Stamford Bridge.

- - -

'Football is a game for gentlemen played by thugs; rugby is a game for thugs played by gentlemen.'

The next time anyone makes that sort of pat, condescending and arrogant remark, ED is going to go Schalk Burger on their ass and rip both their eyes off their stalks.

Footballers are frequently criticised for their behaviour on the pitch, and often with justification.

A common refrain is 'why can't they be more like rugby players?' Basically because they call the referee 'Sir' and clap each other on and off the pitch.

But Burger's premeditated and blatant gouge on Luke Fitzgerald during Saturday's South Africa-Lions game showed just how much mutual respect really exists behind the cosmetic niceties.

Even the supposedly exemplary way players deal with the ref is exaggerated.  Eurosport-Yahoo!'s very own Neil Back served a six-month ban in 1996 after pushing over referee Steve Lander following Leicester's defeat to Bath in the Pilkington Cup final.

Players might address him like he is a schoolmaster, but only usually to deny things of which they are clearly guilty.

Forwards in particular spend much of their time pushing the boundaries of legality and trying to deceive the ref. But because they aren't diving or feigning injury, nobody seems to mind that particular brand of cheating.

Throw in Matt Stevens's positive cocaine test and worrying tales of more widespread recreational drug use, and you have a sport that does not exactly live up to the Corinthian image some people would like to give it.

Footballers are vilified, often because they are young, poorly-educated, rich and frequently obnoxious. They are easy targets for envy.

Of course conduct in the game could be improved, but if football is looking for an example to follow, it should steer clear of rugby.

- - -

QUOTE OF THE WEEKEND: Joan Laporta on Manchester City's bid to sign Samuel Eto'o: "Eto'o has a stratospheric offer from City, which would convert him into the best paid player in the world. It's starting to become clear that he has this monster offer. He wants to stay but an offer like this is very difficult to refuse. If Eto'o accepts this stratospheric offer we will have to bring in someone." So you're saying it's good.

FOREIGN VIEW: German rag Bild list has 20 reasons why the Nationalmannschaft will win tonight.

Included in these is: 'Because it is time for revenge!' Not for 1966, mind you. For 1982, when England beat Germany in the Euro U21 final.

Also featuring: 'Because our youngsters have been on apple juice for 18 days. They are 90 minutes away from going to a Swedish nightclub.'

COMING UP: England v Germany in the Euro U21 final - follow our live coverage from 19:45 UK time. Plus there is a stellar line-up at Wimbledon, including Andy Murray and Roger Federer.

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