The saviour of English football
Thu Aug 28 09:00AM
Behind the strangely fake-looking facial hair that Early Doors can't get used to after more than a year perched precariously on Rafa Benitez's face (the facial hair, not ED), lies the saviour of English football.
The Liverpool gaffer might just have saved the nation's bacon with his brazenly self-serving decision to send Steven Gerrard for groin surgery.
As a result, Fabio Capello will not get the opportunity to "kill" Stevie G in the World Cup qualifiers against Andorra and Croatia.
(Indicentally - before Scouseland goes off half-cocked - ED has no problem with Liverpool sending Gerrard for an operation ahead of the international break. He's their player after all. But it's fairly cynical.)
Given England managers' pathological inability to pick just one of Gerrard and Frank Lampard, that could be great news indeed.
Only once can ED remember an England manager dropping either man, and that was when Steve McClaren, of all people, kept Gareth Barry in ahead of Lampard for the Euro 2008 qualifiers against Estonia and Russia.
Of course, McClaren lost his bottle, by bringing Lampard back, and then his job, by losing to Croatia (the second time, with the umbrella. Not the first time with the Robinson airshot; or indeed the third time - signature calamitous moment to be decided).
Otherwise, successive coaches have attempted to shoehorn them both into the same, alpha-male-heavy midfield by playing either one or both men hopelessly out of position.
Remember Sven's attempt to convert Fat Frank into a holding player? Or Gerrard's recent deployment on the left (ED doesn't care what Don Fabio's Christmas tree says; he was playing out wide)?
Now Capello is more or less forced to pick a midfield with some balance, with Joe Cole on the left, where he is good, and Barry and Lampard in the middle.
Even with David Beckham strolling around on the right, day-dreaming about his courtside seats at the Lakers and pinging corners straight at the nearest defender, it looks a hell of a lot better.
So, if England go on to win the 2010 World Cup - a big ask, admittedly - Capello should share his honorary knighthood with Benitez.
- - -
People are very keen on putting a price tag on goals, particularly important ones like Dirk Kuyt's extra-time winner against Standard Liege, which cruelly robbed ED of the delicious spectacle of penalties.
Kuyt's tap-in, bringing as it did the guarantee of Champions League football, was valued at £30m; a handy way to repay his vastly inflated transfer fee more than three times over.
But surely the real value to Liverpool fans is not the financial worth, but the facts that: a) They can still win the flipping Champions League, and b) They were spared the embarrassment of getting turned over by a moderate Belgian outfit. The £30m is really neither here nor there.
- - -
Gareth Barry's announcement, via his agent, that he has "decided" to stay at Aston Villa made Early Doors chuckle.
This, of course, is the same Gareth Barry who two months ago said: "My mind's made up, I want to join Liverpool. There's no going back, it's time for me to move on. I'm desperate to play Champions League football and that's why I have to leave Villa."
What's more, the Barry saga demonstrated that he is no more able to decide which club he plays for than he is to sprout wings and fly the entire Villa squad to Cleethorpes.
Contracts are only "not worth the paper they are written on" if clubs spinelessly give in to their players' every whim and allow bigger clubs to bully them.
Villa told Liverpool to meet their valuation of Barry, which they didn't, so the player stayed put. That's how transfers used to work.
In a similar spirit to Barry, Early Doors would like to announce that, after much speculation, it will not become Barack Obama's running mate for the US Presidency.
ED made the decision to stay two weeks ago and informed Senator Obama of his intentions.
ED wants to concentrate on getting up at six in the morning to write some crappy blog, and hopes this draws a line under the matter.
- - -
QUOTE OF THE DAY: Nemanja Vidic on his alleged unflattering comments about Manchester: "I'd like to clarify that I did not make these particular remarks. I spoke about the difficulty I had settling in to life in Manchester, but that does not reflect how I feel now."
Er, so which was it? Are the quotes made up or did you just not mean them? Even Manchester United's official site is confused, saying the remarks "have either been taken out of context or misquoted."
FOREIGN VIEW: "Not Cristiano, nor Villa, nor Cazorla" - Marca laments that, despite the paper's best efforts, Real Madrid have drawn a big fat blank in their pursuit of their main transfer targets this summer.
TALKING POINT: lordofjapes: "ed is a t*** gland. since when has vidic been known as such a hard man? answer? only by man united fans which ed, based down south no doubt, evidently is. the constant digs at city are ridiculous. we've spanked your local team three nowt at the weekend. why don't you take your s***ty column and **** off."
master7525 "Whoever wrote the article is either an idiot or just hates the fact that Manchester United are losing they're best players...."
Today - Who would you most like to see ruled out of England contention? And is Early Doors really a t*** gland?
COMING UP: It's the Champions League draw this afternoon at 5pm - we have live video streaming and traditional text comment coverage. Plus there's UEFA Cup football today, with Manchester City in a spot of bother and Aston Villa, well, not.
Thank you Benitez. Who does Claire support, anyway?
From eliotot on Thu Aug 28 01:32PMGet lost, Skinny Neck!
From rob_snaith on Thu Aug 28 01:32PMkevin: "Im looking for peoples genuine opinions and not smart assed comments!"
Its ED ;) cmon
From kantong_wokster on Thu Aug 28 01:32PMSeeing Archie Knox being interviewed last night reminded me of one of my favourite youtube vids. Go check out Walter Smith giving chick young a tough time. He may be a dirty hun but this is classic!
From rob_snaith on Thu Aug 28 01:34PMKW, I think you work in an office,you struggle all day to make a difference, then at 3 miinutes to six you get the job done! Eh? Eh?
From eliotot on Thu Aug 28 01:34PMKW - How dare you question my Loyality to LFC!!!
From kevin1985kane on Thu Aug 28 01:36PMEliot: i can assure you its not a dump where I work eliotot; and I dont sweat - ladies 'transpire' - ask your mum ;)
And I can assure also you I'm very cheery - I'm still laughing at the Gooners hilarious loss to Fulham on the weekend - thats enough to make anyone grin. I guess next you'll say we have a lucky 18 EPLS and a 'lucky' 5 CL cups? ;)
guess lady luck doesnt think very highly of the gooners then.... or maybe thats karma.... Good luck to ya - its true you need it more than we do
From kantong_wokster on Thu Aug 28 01:36PMKW - I enjoy the banter but sometimes its nice to get a valid opinion now and again!
From kevin1985kane on Thu Aug 28 01:38PMClaire supports Chelsea because when she started watchin EPL again, they were winning the league just like the rest of their fan base!
From kevin1985kane on Thu Aug 28 01:39PMeliotot: I work in an office - Thats all you got right ;)
kevin: well then stop giving me reasons to question your loyalty - if you were anymore pessmistic, not only would you be seeing things as 'the cup half empty', but it would also have a long crack down the side, and you will cut your lip on it! but its ok - I forgive you cause your Red and everyone can have a bad day - ~ynwa~
From kantong_wokster on Thu Aug 28 01:39PMED may not be a full on **** gland, but let's be honest, ED is that oddly shaped mole on your shoulder that is an absolute embarrassment any time you have to take you shirt off. And I actually wouldn't mind seeing Wes Brown replaced on the England side. He makes Gary Neville look like a young Cafu!
From mrsims150 on Thu Aug 28 01:43PMWhat is karma? And does it run over your dogma? What has coming fourth to do with karma? So what kind of place do you work in then? From your eternal bloggings here I imagine it must be lot of fun there, especially when Pool lose.
From eliotot on Thu Aug 28 01:44PMKW - Sorry to sound so pesimistic, but judging on the last couple of weeks performances, theyre will be no cup to be half full or empty! On the optimistic side, 6 points, 2nd in the EPL, Champo league footie secured and G Barry is staying put in the Sh1tty town of Birmingham!
From kevin1985kane on Thu Aug 28 01:45PMkevin - here is a response. We desperately need a left footed winger, reira is a left footed winger. Most of the opinions of him are mixed, but he played a few good matches for City (including victory against the scum) but the consensus is that he is an ok to good winger but for £8m what do you expect. If he was world class he would be £20m+. For me he is good enough for LFC as long as he supplies crosses for our players.
From some_steam on Thu Aug 28 01:47PMSam, there's a difference between pessimism and grim realism. Perhaps he just got sick of the blinkers.
It does make me chuckle how every year Liverpool fans are full of hope for the bright new dawn, and every year you are let down by your team playing the same bland, unadventurous football. I always fear Liverpool because you have the players to be the kind of team that plays awsome stuff and really looks like winning big things, but rafa just doesn't have the balls to take a risk with style or system, at least not until it's too late to make a significant difference. Keep on this way and you'll battle your way to a few cups, great performances from your 2 or 3 world class players might even grab you a bit more success in Europe. But you either need Rafa to grow a pair, or get someone else in, to ever have a realistic chance of another league title.
From rob_snaith on Thu Aug 28 01:47PMAnd now I shall retreat back to my hidey-hole to watch the sh1tstorm.
From rob_snaith on Thu Aug 28 01:48PMEliotot: women are really good at multitasking - I can work AND post at the same time!! amazing isnt it? I know you would find it hard to understand. Shame Arsenal isnt like that - maybe then they could have a chance at the EPL AND the CL at the same time!
what is karma? step on a beetle and then kill yourself and you'll find out quick enough
Its always fun at my work - win or lose - my colleagues know which team rules the roost in this office ;)
From kantong_wokster on Thu Aug 28 01:49PMLOL Kevin. As a note, I reside in China, which now has a large Chelsea fan base. Mostly young kids who started watching EPL about 3 years ago. ManUre and Liversausage are quite popular too. Sometimes it is found scattered over the streets here.
Now I understnd Claire to be Celtic fan, but I have heard they say Celtic with a hissing S, and not with the solid K I am used to using. So Claire is pronounced "Slaire" or something?From eliotot on Thu Aug 28 01:50PMmuch better kevin ;) If we judge on the last couple of weeks performances, Fulham is in with a chance ;) give them a chance - im sure they will appreciate you being 100% behind them ;)
But as for your optomisim in the second part of your post - now you're talkin!
From kantong_wokster on Thu Aug 28 01:53PMrob: I have to get back to work myself - so I just have one thing to say
From kantong_wokster on Thu Aug 28 01:55PMEliotot - you guys have a big following in Ireland & Scotland too but they are generally scumbag memebers of Loyalist paramillitaries from the North & Rangers fans who meet up with the racist Chelsea Combat 18 fans.
Rather have bindippers and hub-cap thieves following my team than that!!From kevin1985kane on Thu Aug 28 02:02PMLove the banter guys, can't even remember the article.... YNWA
From dabirchboy on Thu Aug 28 02:04PMKw as a fellow red i will support you to the death
but we are allowed to criticise our team, because we are always going to be a red win or lose, but i prefer win so when the team is not performing adequately I will give my opinion. Our performances his season have been below par although the results have been great. My opinion is that we lack width and and was constantly shouting at the screen everytime, babel, kuyt and yossi collected the ball on the wing and ran into the centre of the pitch. We are so easy to defend against like this, and of course Kuyt goal came from a cross from Babel finally on the wing! With the purchase of a left winger and the return of Mash and Lucas, we will get better....... but if we don't I'll be back on here to give my opinion. YNWA, win lose or draw.From some_steam on Thu Aug 28 02:17PMMan U is poo!
From some_steam on Thu Aug 28 02:20PM7th place in your fantasy league sucks Jude!
From sikka316 on Thu Aug 28 02:21PM6th only sucks slightly less
From sikka316 on Thu Aug 28 02:22PMMan U will get points deducted for sucking
From some_steam on Thu Aug 28 02:24PMJUDE SUCKS!
From kantong_wokster on Thu Aug 28 02:25PMwot up judey pie
From bencornelius23 on Thu Aug 28 02:30PMdude ive been doin a good job my man. there was a sevre avatar incident yesterday and i sortd it out on you behalf, go back and read it man! u can ask roxy.even she will tell u ive dun a gud job!except for when i went away.
From bencornelius23 on Thu Aug 28 02:36PM
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