Wee man for West Ham?
Mon Sep 08 09:04AM
We may not see a week as downright barmy as the last one for a long time, but there is still plenty of scope for fun to be had. The simple equation of international week + two managerial vacancies = plenty of speculation and conjecture to get stuck into.
It might not quite be a power-crazed oil magnate bursting onto the scene and throwing his money around like Michael Jackson's shopping trip with Martin Bashir, but the prospect of Gianfranco Zola becoming the next West Ham manager is still guaranteed to rock the house.
The loveable horseface has emerged as the top candidate on the Hammers' shortlist, which also includes fellow Italian Roberto Donadoni and former Getafe boss Michael Laudrup.
Croatia boss Slaven Bilic has ruled himself out of the running, declaring himself too busy planning Wednesday's 2-1 defeat of England to go for an interview.
The tingle of excitement ED gets every time it imagines Zola returning to these shores is, however, tempered with trepidation. The pocket magician would be merely the latest in a long line of ex-players putting their god-like status in jeopardy by moving into management.
As much as the current Italy Under-21 boss was dazzling on the pitch, can he instil the discipline needed to manage a group of filthy-rich young players? Being on the end of a Zola rollocking would probably be more hand-dryer than hairdryer.
Or, much like Glenn Hoddle, the wee Sardinian would become frustrated all too easily with his players because he would still be more talented than most of them. Unless he has a penchant for faith healers or criticising the disabled, however, that's where the similarity ends.
The same could be said for Laudrup, a player so good he won La Liga with both Barcelona and Real Madrid. The Dane should consult his brother, Brian, before moving to London, as his brother had a less than successful spell in the capital with Chelsea.
As for the other man in the frame, having already managed another team that have won the World Cup but is now over-reliant on a top goalkeeper and a big striker, Roberto Donadoni could fit right in at Upton Park.
Meanwhile, the Newcastle hierarchy are unlikely to see the same glut of candidates ready to take up the St James' hot seat, with even former owner Freddie Shepherd highlighting the ridiculous pressure heaped on every Magpies boss. He should know, he's canned a few in his time.
Toon executive director Dennis "Cutty" Wise isn't really the sort of guy many top class coaches want to work under, especially following the news that, when Kevin Keegan asked him "Who or what is a Xisco?", Wise told him to go look up his new signing on Youtube to get better acquainted with him.
Wise has proven his ability to cast a long shadow for such a short man. Toon owner Mike Ashley should just dispense with the executive director role - pioneered in this country by the likes of Ron Atkinson - and give Wisey the job. After things didn't work out with the Messiah, they may as well try the anti-Christ.
- - -
The Premier League may have been turned on it's head over the past seven days, but little has changed on the England side of things, as Our Boys laboured to a 2-0 win over Andorra, Fabio Capello's first competitive match in charge.
To be fair, even the best teams would find it hard to break through 11 men behind the ball from the word go, had the knives already been Capello a la McClaren then that match could well have been the last straw.
As there were no highlights shown anywhere, we'll have to pool our collective memories of the match at the Olympic Stadium from the one look we had at it. Ed remembers (in no particular order):
* John Terry's foul throw (a great achievement, seeing as nobody ever seems to be called up for in the professional game, no matter how bad it is)
* Andorra defender Lima's ball-juggling and clearance from his own corner flag when being pressured by Theo Walcott, which instantly became the greatest moment in Andorran football history
* The crowd chanting "We hate S*****a" before the first boos began to ring out around the half-hour mark
And, er, that's it.
- - -
QUOTE OF THE WEEKEND - "I can tell Mr Capello, he can try coaching Andorra and I will try coaching England - and I am sure that we will beat Andorra by more than 2-0!" - Andorra boss David Rodrigo still manages to bullishly goad England despite their defeat in Barcelona.
TALKING POINT - ED's suspicions that asking people to donate money to charity for their comments being published has led directly to a drop in comment quality is summed up well by samuelbanks: "ED this idea of paying money to charity to have their comments read out is all well and good but spare a thought for the peole who are penniless and work in tescos. how about you also mention a comment from one other non charitable soul. Otherwise people are going to put even less effort into their contibutions to the posts." Come on guys, you can all do better.
Today - What did you make of the home nation's results at the weekend? And, with directors of football, over-controlling boards and crazy Arabs on spending sprees, is the role of the humble manager becoming redundant?
COMING UP - The Three Lions juggernaut rolled out of Andorra at roughly the same time as the riders of the Vuelta a Espana. Follow the riders on Stage Nine today from 11:30 BST here.
And, believe it or not, but Andy Murray is in the US Open final. He's already beaten the best player in the world, now can he beat the best of all time to claim his first Grand Slam? Find out here tonight from 22:00 BST.
Dharrrr-um.....
From early.jaws on Mon Sep 08 09:04AMAndy Murray to fail catistrophically to beat former world number 1 Federer.
From g_hine on Mon Sep 08 09:15AMScottish supporters should take up following tennis. MacEdonaska is not a Gaelic place name. They can be irate about Andy Murray being described as from Great Britain. I live for the day when Little Britain has a sketch with Walliams and Lucas in kilts pretending to be Scottish football supporters.
From james_ssmith on Mon Sep 08 09:16AMIreland to win World Cup 2010
From kevin1985kane on Mon Sep 08 09:19AM*ttt!!Sorry, 'MacEdonska' pronounced with a hard 'c'
From james_ssmith on Mon Sep 08 09:20AM"The Dane should consult his brother, Michael, before moving to London, as his brother had a less than successful spell in the capital with Chelsea."
You'll be meaning 'his brother, Brian'...?
Also, Tennis is for girls and kak-pipe cosmonauts.
From early.jaws on Mon Sep 08 09:24AMHow bad were England on Saturday night, didnt see the game but the scoreline says it all!
From kevin1985kane on Mon Sep 08 09:28AMSame old from England. If you know Andorra will put 11 men behind the ball why not play with two defenders only
From c99m08 on Mon Sep 08 09:31AMOnce again I'm amazed how 3 writers can know so little about football. I donated to a charity for out of work hacks condemned to writing total nonsense on an internet website read by 600 people a day
From trouble_906 on Mon Sep 08 09:32AMas football is all about options, why arent Ashley Young, Gabby Abonglahor and Tom Huddlestone in the current England squad! i am shocked to see that Downing gets to play and the same with Defore. these players are just not good enough to pull on the England shirt. also why i am moaning how can Rooney still get to start for England when he hasnt scored for years! there must be some Sponsership deal that the Press\Fans are not aware of that means that Rooney has to play! think thats why Lampard and Gerrard seem to get games as well. Moan Moan Moan!!!!
From matthewdurgan on Mon Sep 08 09:33AMA whole ED on West Ham and Newcastle - who gives a @#$%?
From c99m08 on Mon Sep 08 09:37AMThey seem to say a result after a poor performance shows a winning mentality, no-one seems to agree with that here, surely with a better team and better opposition we can stil grind out a result
boring to watch mostly, but the old 1-0 to the arse-nal was something that the gooners were happy with all those years ago, shouldn't we be just be happy with the result?
From roxydgurl on Mon Sep 08 09:42AMI like the news
From li_dingb on Mon Sep 08 09:49AMWhen they asked Andy Murray a couple of years ago who he wanted to win the World Cup he replied "anyone but England" Why the f**k should we support him now??? Just more Scottish inferiority complex coming out - and they say WE'RE racist?? Go figure.
From richardcliffe on Mon Sep 08 09:49AMEngland's lack of creative play and movement is astounding. Then again, when you consider that Lampard's isn't, nor is Barry's, nor is Downing's, nor is Heskey's, nor is Defoe's - you realise that to expect a team comprising put-your-head-down-and-run-hard players to be collectively creative in their movement and passing, is not unlike expecting the G8 to end poverty, or indeed the UN to change the world. Capello simply must be more radical. Pace, movement, creativity and strength are the key ingredients of today's game. Theo Walcott and Joe Cole are a step in the right direction. Lamps, Becks, Barry and Downing aren't.
From maildude911 on Mon Sep 08 09:50AMEngland are by far the most charitable team in the World Cup
I mean, giving all those teams with names we have never heard of some sort of hope of winning; allowing hope to reign for countries where footy (or soccer) is an afterthought - its so very charitable of them
From kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 10:00AMMorning Sam - Loving the whole Irish look there!
From kevin1985kane on Mon Sep 08 10:05AMWell done to Wales Nothern Ireland and ex Hammer Joe Cole for at least scoring
As usual no style, no pattern in fact no anything same as one might expect from a completely random XI picked out from wobbling masses of a night club on a Saturday night.
This 'Carry on Footie' approach only results in in Bilic being quite correct when he asserts ' No one fears England ' to which I might add 'except for those scared of gying laughing.'
If I supported any of the 'great british' teams I would get a proper 'EU' passport and pretend to be German
From arttidesco on Mon Sep 08 10:05AMim sure theres alot more people out there who would answer anti england when asked who they wanted to win the world cup, im 23 and i would bet with anyone that england will not win the world cup before im 80. He flew the flag at the olymics (mabye not as well as he should have) and if you dont want to get behind him in the US Open, shame on you's, Cummon Murray!!!!!!
From chuggen84 on Mon Sep 08 10:11AM'Good luck' to Andy Murray the dreams of a completely disillusioned footballing nation seem to rest on his shoulders, lets hope he is blessed with a miracle and beats the guy from Switzerland with the many cows
From arttidesco on Mon Sep 08 10:13AMEngland sucked! 2-0 against a pub team is just embarrassing.
From jude_surf on Mon Sep 08 10:13AMmorning kevin
yes - have the leprochaun outfit on today with my lucky four leaf clover pinned to my dress and a pot of gold with a rainbow going on behind me
I could do with the luck this week ;) luck 'o the Irish as we say!From kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 10:15AMRoxy's hot!
From jude_surf on Mon Sep 08 10:15AMSpurs suck!
From jude_surf on Mon Sep 08 10:15AMLiverpool suck!
From jude_surf on Mon Sep 08 10:15AMWest Ham are cheats
From jude_surf on Mon Sep 08 10:16AMMan Utd Sucks !
From arttidesco on Mon Sep 08 10:16AMMurray sucks!
From jude_surf on Mon Sep 08 10:16AMLike the outfit too Kantong Sam
From jude_surf on Mon Sep 08 10:18AMBTW ED, what a superb article this is - irreverent satirical genius. Don't let the chatroom dullards grind you down
From early.jaws on Mon Sep 08 10:19AM
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