Early Doors - Your morning briefing blog

Early Doors

Wee man for West Ham?

Mon Sep 08 09:04AM

Gianfranco Zola We may not see a week as downright barmy as the last one for a long time, but there is still plenty of scope for fun to be had.

The simple equation of international week + two managerial vacancies = plenty of speculation and conjecture to get stuck into.

It might not quite be a power-crazed oil magnate bursting onto the scene and throwing his money around like Michael Jackson's shopping trip with Martin Bashir, but the prospect of Gianfranco Zola becoming the next West Ham manager is still guaranteed to rock the house.

The loveable horseface has emerged as the top candidate on the Hammers' shortlist, which also includes fellow Italian Roberto Donadoni and former Getafe boss Michael Laudrup.

Croatia boss Slaven Bilic has ruled himself out of the running, declaring himself too busy planning Wednesday's 2-1 defeat of England to go for an interview.

The tingle of excitement ED gets every time it imagines Zola returning to these shores is, however, tempered with trepidation. The pocket magician would be merely the latest in a long line of ex-players putting their god-like status in jeopardy by moving into management.

As much as the current Italy Under-21 boss was dazzling on the pitch, can he instil the discipline needed to manage a group of filthy-rich young players? Being on the end of a Zola rollocking would probably be more hand-dryer than hairdryer.

Or, much like Glenn Hoddle, the wee Sardinian would become frustrated all too easily with his players because he would still be more talented than most of them. Unless he has a penchant for faith healers or criticising the disabled, however, that's where the similarity ends.

The same could be said for Laudrup, a player so good he won La Liga with both Barcelona and Real Madrid. The Dane should consult his brother, Brian, before moving to London, as his brother had a less than successful spell in the capital with Chelsea.

As for the other man in the frame, having already managed another team that have won the World Cup but is now over-reliant on a top goalkeeper and a big striker, Roberto Donadoni could fit right in at Upton Park.

Meanwhile, the Newcastle hierarchy are unlikely to see the same glut of candidates ready to take up the St James' hot seat, with even former owner Freddie Shepherd highlighting the ridiculous pressure heaped on every Magpies boss. He should know, he's canned a few in his time.

Toon executive director Dennis "Cutty" Wise isn't really the sort of guy many top class coaches want to work under, especially following the news that, when Kevin Keegan asked him "Who or what is a Xisco?", Wise told him to go look up his new signing on Youtube to get better acquainted with him.

Wise has proven his ability to cast a long shadow for such a short man. Toon owner Mike Ashley should just dispense with the executive director role - pioneered in this country by the likes of Ron Atkinson - and give Wisey the job. After things didn't work out with the Messiah, they may as well try the anti-Christ.    

- - -

The Premier League may have been turned on it's head over the past seven days, but little has changed on the England side of things, as Our Boys laboured to a 2-0 win over Andorra, Fabio Capello's first competitive match in charge.

To be fair, even the best teams would find it hard to break through 11 men behind the ball from the word go, had the knives already been Capello a la McClaren then that match could well have been the last straw.

As there were no highlights shown anywhere, we'll have to pool our collective memories of the match at the Olympic Stadium from the one look we had at it. Ed remembers (in no particular order):

* John Terry's foul throw (a great achievement, seeing as nobody ever seems to be called up for in the professional game, no matter how bad it is)

* Andorra defender Lima's ball-juggling and clearance from his own corner flag when being pressured by Theo Walcott, which instantly became the greatest moment in Andorran football history

* The crowd chanting "We hate S*****a" before the first boos began to ring out around the half-hour mark

And, er, that's it.

- - -

QUOTE OF THE WEEKEND - "I can tell Mr Capello, he can try coaching Andorra and I will try coaching England - and I am sure that we will beat Andorra by more than 2-0!" - Andorra boss David Rodrigo still manages to bullishly goad England despite their defeat in Barcelona.

TALKING POINT - ED's suspicions that asking people to donate money to charity for their comments being published has led directly to a drop in comment quality is summed up well by samuelbanks: "ED this idea of paying money to charity to have their comments read out is all well and good but spare a thought for the peole who are penniless and work in tescos. how about you also mention a comment from one other non charitable soul. Otherwise people are going to put even less effort into their contibutions to the posts." Come on guys, you can all do better.

Today - What did you make of the home nation's results at the weekend? And, with directors of football, over-controlling boards and crazy Arabs on spending sprees, is the role of the humble manager becoming redundant?

COMING UP - The Three Lions juggernaut rolled out of Andorra at roughly the same time as the riders of the Vuelta a Espana. Follow the riders on Stage Nine today from 11:30 BST here.  

And, believe it or not, but Andy Murray is in the US Open final. He's already beaten the best player in the world, now can he beat the best of all time to claim his first Grand Slam? Find out here tonight from 22:00 BST.  

  1. as james said - its a little bit Aer Lingus air hostess for me to keep it for too long

    might go for a change tomorrow - makes it more interesting and challenging for the imposters, cant make it too easy for them ;)

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:39PM

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  2. Ben ma man, how're the ideals?

    rob_snaithFrom rob_snaith on Mon Sep 08 09:39PM

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  3. how old is Gene Hackman now though?

    not that I'm being "ageist" or anything ;)

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:39PM

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  4. james its a wetsuit.a clue as to how i spent my morning.
    samone is your peace rocket directed at me purely beause i think you look cute in tht outfit!?!? ;-)

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 09:40PM

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  5. they are peace bazookas ben,

    peace bazookas

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:41PM

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  6. ten minutes of adverts and I've found aussie football Geelong 31 St. Kilda . Looks like thrashing to me.

    james_ssmithFrom james_ssmith on Mon Sep 08 09:42PM

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  7. Don't worry im not a theif, but there is a very sexy women that lives near me who hangs all her sexy underwear out on the line. Ben would love it. He could get his binoculars out, and maybe even start stalking her. haha only winding you benny boy.

    samuelbanksFrom samuelbanks on Mon Sep 08 09:42PM

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  8. the last time i went diving was in the dominican republic

    nice place if you ever get a chance to go there

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:42PM

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  9. they are slowley gaining momentum rob but tangable results are still a fair way off

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 09:43PM

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  10. St Kilda thrashed us by over 100 points last week

    bàstards... :(

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:43PM

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  11. What is it 2 oclock with you over in LA ben.

    samuelbanksFrom samuelbanks on Mon Sep 08 09:43PM

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  12. Ben, Is it the same wetsuit as in Pulp Fiction? It's weird to spend all morning in a trunk, but, hey, anything goes in California.

    james_ssmithFrom james_ssmith on Mon Sep 08 09:44PM

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  13. dont say bazookas samone cos thts wot i called breasts when i was about 12! and im pretty sure your not sending me an invite to your bazookas! haha

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 09:44PM

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  14. Keep fighting the good fight Ben, if you're lucky you'll get shot in the jungle somewhare and be remembered as a hero

    rob_snaithFrom rob_snaith on Mon Sep 08 09:46PM

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  15. ben: oh but I am the master of inuendo

    I expect others to interpret what i say as they see fit ;)

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:46PM

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  16. its almost 2 yeah. and im not living in LA samuel. i live in joshua tree and travel to the beach for a cupla days at a time

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 09:47PM

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  17. James that joke - Is the answer because she didn't know where to find B.
    I think i've seen that film Sam. enjoyed it even tho i can't stand gene hackman. when i was a kid i thought gene hackman was a women.

    samuelbanksFrom samuelbanks on Mon Sep 08 09:48PM

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  18. oh i see samone. so by 'peace bro' you actually meant 'you are welcome to look at my breasts'!?!?

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 09:49PM

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  19. and if no one shoots you - baloo the bear can keep you company

    he's such a friendly little fella

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:49PM

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  20. I've just seen a Geelong supporter who looks a bit like Kantong. Geelong 38-St'Kilda 14 2nd Quarter

    james_ssmithFrom james_ssmith on Mon Sep 08 09:51PM

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  21. Where's joshua tree. im intrigued. You watchin the us open final.

    samuelbanksFrom samuelbanks on Mon Sep 08 09:51PM

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  22. ben: as I said you to you earlier you can interpret it as you see fit

    and just for the sake of rhyming, let me add - you wont see @#$% ;)

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:52PM

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  23. shoot her now while you have her in your sights james

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:52PM

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  24. southern cali.just outside palm springs and indio.

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 09:53PM

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  25. I hope that wasnt a disguised racist comment there james

    all us aussies look alike to you, dont we? huh? huh? :-P do they punk?

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:54PM

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  26. She looked like a happy soul. Obviously Geelong is not your team. The Serb commentary betrays as much knowledge of the game as mine.

    james_ssmithFrom james_ssmith on Mon Sep 08 09:55PM

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  27. hey im the poem master round here! there have been lame attempts to match my skill, all of which have failed! nobody will dethrone me!!

    dont rule it out so quickley samone! i have very reasonable ideals when it comes o breasts! bigger is not better! a c/d cup is optimum in my opinion.

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 09:56PM

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  28. I kind of miss watching Aussie rules - you cant get it over here, not possible

    my dad used to play professionally, and his great claim to fame was to have played in the grand final with a broken nose, two broken ribs, a broken finger and a dislocated shoulder

    Cronaldo would never stand a chance over there....

    I grew up eating, living, breathing aussie rules and used to umpire for a while too

    Essendon is my team - the mighty Bombers (not so mighty at the moment) :(

    kantong_woksterFrom kantong_wokster on Mon Sep 08 09:58PM

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  29. 666 all bow down

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 10:00PM

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  30. 666 all bow down

    bencornelius23From bencornelius23 on Mon Sep 08 10:00PM

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