A man's game
Wed Feb 13 08:58AM
Nigel Reo-Coker yesterday bemoaned the demise of football as a contact sport, recycling the familiar line: "It's not even a man's game." And even a cursory look at his face would suggest he is right.
The Aston Villa midfielder has picked up eight bookings this season for a series of mis-timed tackles, proving that at least part of Reo-Coker's game is like watching Paul Scholes.
Introspection and self-improvement sound a bit too much like hard work for most players, who would rather blame the world or, in this case, diving toe-rags.
"I thought football was a physical game but now, if you slightly touch a player, they go down and do 20 rolls and a back-flip to get you cautioned," Reo-Coker wailed.
Early Doors thinks that any player who pulls off 20 rolls and a back-flip on being fouled deserves to get his opponent booked.
At least he didn't ignore the regular Greg Louganis impressions of Steven Gerrard, Wayne Rooney and Andy Johnson and say it was all the foreigners' fault.
Reo-Coker could have picked a better day to complain about the demise of the hard man, with two of the division's Premier panto villains getting some good news from FA HQ.
The ever-charming duo of Joey Barton and Lee Bowyer both avoided punishment after their exploits at the weekend.
Barton was not charged after cameras caught him shoving Aston Villa's Shaun Maloney to the deck - in the Newcastle box of all places.
Everybody's favourite hate figure beat the rap earlier this season after applying studs to Dickson Etuhu's breadbasket against Sunderland and not even getting booked.
Perhaps the FA thought Barton has enough to worry about as the subject of two separate police investigations.
Meanwhile another acquaintance of Her Majesty's officers, Lee Bowyer, had some good news as his red card against Birmingham was overturned.
Bowyer went in on Damien Johnson with Reo-Cokerish timing, but Mark Clattenburg's decision to give him his marching order was adjudged harsh.
Early Doors would have let the sending-off stand on the grounds that, while he probably didn't deserve it, he will one day - and we all know prevention is better than cure.
- - -
On the subject of crime and punishment, Early Doors can't help but sympathise with former Hamburg Sea Devil Dwain Chambers.
Chambers, whose embryonic stint with the German American (sic) Football team ended when the whole flipping league folded, seems to be rubbing people up the wrong way by running quickly and not being on drugs.
(This is the point where Early Doors remembers it always gets in trouble when it strays away from football... oh, who cares? Nobody's reading anyway.)
You may remember he (Chambers, not Early Doors, who is of course non-gender-specific) was banned from athletics for two years in 2003 for taking the banned steroid THG; much as Christine Ohuruogu served a one-year suspension after missing three out-of-competition tests.
One thing you are allowed to do after serving a ban is run in the World Indoor Championships; one thing you are not - for Britons at least - is run in the Olympics.
So why would you overturn Ohuruogu's Olympic ban and press for Chambers to be excluded from the British indoor squad?
If UK Athletics doesn't like the rules, it should change them. But when you attempt to ignore them you tend to open yourself up to accusations of massive hypocrisy.
Chambers might be an arrogant, unpleasant so-and-so. He might not be - Early Doors has never met him. But if he were, it would hardly make him different from most of the world's professional sportsmen.
A single-minded pursuit of success rarely goes hand-in-hand with caring about other people.
Early Doors wouldn't want to be trapped in a lift with Linford Christie, Sebastian Coe or Daley Thompson, but the men knew how to win. With British athletics in its current miserable state, it can hardly afford to ostracise its most talented sprinter.
- - -
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "When we sat down with Andy I saw the hunger and desire and he still has a point to prove to show he can still play at a high level. There was never a doubt in my mind what Andrew Cole would bring to this club." Andy or Andrew? Burnley boss Owen Coyle is hedging his bets.
FOREIGN VIEW: Russia coach Guus Hiddink has put himself in line for the Order of Stakhanov with some world-class toadying: "Russia is a big country, a superpower, and of course to meet such a powerful leader as Putin is a big honour for any person, especially a foreigner like myself. It would be a great honour for me."
DEBATE OF THE DAY: Football is a haven for shameless self-promotion so why should Early Doors buck the trend? But if you wanted a second opinion on the greatness of this blog, here's donmcelhoney's objective view: "You are Massive in Eccles and Urmston." Thanks Don.
In honour of the UEFA Cup's return, today's question is: what is the worst tournament in football history? Early Doors (Early Doors makes that nine references to itself.. no, 10!) could never get enough of the Zenith Data Systems Cup, but what do you reckon?
COMING UP: If the UEFA Cup has a business end, this is it. Everton and Rangers are in last 32 action tonight - follow live text commentary from 7pm.
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IM this storyWorst tournament..........well given that we have a european cup, african cup and so on, you've got to ssume there's an arctic cup, which, in all hionestly, has got to be pretty @#$%.
From ben.molyneux on Wed Feb 13 09:15AMI HATE SEBASTIAN COE!
From redamaher1978 on Wed Feb 13 09:16AMReo-Coker is right.
But the simple way to fix it is to fine palyers is they are proved to have dived, by video evidence, after the game.
1st offence - 1 weeks wages. 2nd offence - 3 weeks wages. Stamp out diving and give the sport some credibility as far as being a mans game.From suzukiaussietrav on Wed Feb 13 09:23AMLe Tournoi was pretty bad but at least England won something! Go Team England!
From ashman_ashy_ash on Wed Feb 13 09:25AMvery true, about athletics, it seems they have a grudge to bear against the runner as he has shown them how silly this thing can get, he's allowed in as he didnt resign or retire from athletics and so he was overlooked for drug testing. i think they should forget the whole thing and just let everyone take drugs, perhaps then it might make the olympics a bit more interesting to see people the size of the hulk smashing there way trough the hurdles or throwing the javelin out of the stadium -- they have nearly all taken drugs anyway so just let them get on with it
From flashr2468 on Wed Feb 13 09:26AMI used to love the SIMOD Cup. great name, and i f i rememer rightly there was a sketch where someone (perhaps the Mary Whitehouse Experience) described it as the 'Cup for temas that can't win any other cups' Cup'
From dangreavey on Wed Feb 13 09:30AMDunno about the worst tournament, but surely the worst league champions were the Serb team Obilic in 1997/8 owned by the hoodlum Arkan and still chaired by his widow, the lovely but artificially enhanced, Ceca. Arkan would threaten opposing teams and his house overlooks the Red Star ground. Ceca, by the way, is the megastar of the world's worst pop music, Turbopop, a fusion of Turkish and god-knows-what music.
From james_ssmith on Wed Feb 13 09:47AMI think perhaps the Intercontinental Cup was one of the worst tournaments ever, from many perspectives. First of all, it was only one game, which generally is not enough for most football fans. From an English perspective, the only English team to have won it was Manchester United in 1999 (against the mighty Palmeiras). Not because they were the only team capable of doing so, but because more often than not, English teams would simply decide not to turn up!
Best tournament, however, would have to be the Tournoi de France in 1997, in which England used their games not to warm up for the World Cup, but to nurture future commentators such as Ian Wright, Alan Shearer, Graeme Le Saux. These were the days when Romario could get about without a cane, Patrice Loko was playing instead of Thierry Henry, and Pierluigi Casiraghi had not yet destroyed his legs (and consequently his career).
Bring back 1997.
From matt_smith2002uk on Wed Feb 13 09:48AMAnglo Italian Cup? English 2nd division against Italian 2nd division.....
Screen Sports Cup? (Old World Club Championship. Estudiantes V's AC Milan synchronised diving competition)....From wistysboy on Wed Feb 13 09:48AMGood old Nigel Medi-Ocre. Football is still a mans game, it's just you cant go clattering into someone after the ball has gone! Then in football thats what we call a foul, and then if its a late challenge, lets be honest some of his are later than trains it deserves a booking! If Scholes isn't as bad any more, maybe its age catching up with him or the fact that he isnt fit and shouldnt be playing for a few weeks!?
From nickyclarke7 on Wed Feb 13 09:58AMDon't know about it being the worst cup but I recall Graeme Souness commenting that the Centenary Cup was so called because it was 10 years since the contestants had won anything!
From geelte on Wed Feb 13 10:05AMHaving watched Lee Bowyers "tackles" for years on Tyneside I believe he should be charged with assault for every single one of them.
From kitchandjane on Wed Feb 13 10:29AMIn reference to the persecution of G. M. Chambers, in a time of dwindling GCSE Science results and alongside the general demise of secondary education, surely this ‘performance-enhancing’ drugs issue can be turned into a positive. I propose that an undersubscribed sport such as athletics can benefit from this fresh influx of ‘science in action’, also providing a vehicle for the governments semi-covert attempts at making children learn (MCL for those in the trade). Imagine, kids everywhere putting aside their differences, class-A drugs and catapults, instead working hard in laboratories to modify the next Olympic champion.
From christymichaelosullivan on Wed Feb 13 10:38AMI was stuck in an apartment at university with Sebastian Coe - You are dead right about the lift.
From dhe_axgb on Wed Feb 13 10:42AMi would like to agree with reo but your wrong, the stars of today are too expenses to tackle, and referees have been told no tackling prizied assets, plus for those fans in the gods the only action they see is stars falling over, so the game hasn't gone soft, its gone to hollywood.
From kremlemway on Wed Feb 13 10:45AMReo-coker does make a very valid observation. Look at Michael Ballack! He who goes down like he has been shot (yes chelski fans, he saved you from a good pasting against the villa!). But, RC does have the habit of being somewhat "over enthusiatic" in his challenges, and somewhat rash - And I'm a villa fan
From wayne_roden on Wed Feb 13 10:57AMYes, I have to agree...Daley Thompson is a complete $&!*...
From thomasd.wragg on Wed Feb 13 11:02AMWhere on God's Earth is Urmston??????!!!!!!????
From loopingstar2000 on Wed Feb 13 11:26AMthe worst tournament in football history is yet to happen. Man U playing Bolton in Bejing, Chelski playing Fulham in rio de janero, Sunderland playing Middlesbrough in Sydney!
From denisshepherd on Wed Feb 13 12:02PMthe governing bodies have ruined our sport & unless someone up there is brave enough 2 s@#$% the ammended rules and take us 2 the good old days, I'm affraid football is becoming less of a contact sport than tennis
From zgwete on Wed Feb 13 12:04PMYet again the FA fail to deal with the thugs in our national sport. Barton goes unpunished (again) for more attempted GBH.
How long before he does serious injury to a fellow professional ?
From pstewart77uk on Wed Feb 13 12:28PMEarly doors should be ashamed as Reo Coker is right. If you read his full statement you'll find that he is saying 'it is not the mistiming of challenges that earns booking but the 20 rolls and a backflip that players do afterwards' and we all know it is true. If you trip a player it is not a booking unless you have been fouling persistantly yet i've seen bookings for trips because referees haven't played the game and believe the theatrics of the so called victim of a challenge. What made maradona's goal so special was the fact that he darted past so many full pledged challenges and so it will be easy for anyone to do a 'maradona' as player will be afraid to tackle. I watched the manchester derby and ronaldo went down in the box without being touch and the ref didn't even book him, there is no real repremand for diving and until there is player won't even acknowledge it as cheating!!!
From edada84 on Wed Feb 13 01:02PMThe Auto-windscreens cup, won by birmingham city when they were sponsored by auto windscreens..... match fixing????
From andybob3288 on Wed Feb 13 01:04PMReo Coker is right.Take Christiano Ronaldo for an example,just now I would say he is playing the best football in the world but yet he dives and live reo said rolls about 20 times. One of the good things about Gerrard game and one of the reasons he gets noticed at the highest level is because he is clean and consistant.
From shanice76 on Wed Feb 13 02:02PMHave you seen the new FIFA world rankings? How did Egypt only go up 6 places, while Ghana go up 29. Does this mean that England should be ranked first because they didnt make it to the Euros?
From karim_eldib on Wed Feb 13 02:30PMThe Oseania Cup? Who'd watch Salomon Islands vs Mikronesia? I doubt they have any islands large enough to actually make a football pitch.
From g_tande on Wed Feb 13 02:58PMGerrard, clean and consistant? Two dives against Sheffield United in the same season to keep a @#$% team in the Champions League places! Good One. Im not doubting he's a good player but even Gerrard has liked a dive or a late takle every now and again!
From nickyclarke7 on Wed Feb 13 03:06PMGreat stuff as usual. I thought Eccles were cakes!!!!!!!!!
From john_wingfield on Wed Feb 13 03:54PM"One of the good things about Gerrard game and one of the reasons he gets noticed at the highest level is because he is clean and consistant."
Yeah, right. They all dive, even the spotless brits. It's just that CR and Drogba are the ones that are being crucified because they're Jonny foreigners and not national heroes in the UK.
It's annoying but it's a part of the game these days. Bring on fines and have players miss games if they are found diving on replays and it might stop.
From is_spc on Wed Feb 13 10:52PMKeegan No Hope...
Messy-Aahh
From farah_shazana on Thu Feb 14 01:25AM
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