Flat-track bully
Mon Feb 18 08:51AM
David James cemented his reputation as the Mark Ramprakash of football with a stunning performance against Preston yesterday.
Jamo pulled off a string of brilliant saves - including a full-stretch diving effort to deny Neil Mellor - and repelled a penalty in Portsmouth's smash-and-grab win at Deepdale.
If you're playing Bolton, James is undoubtedly the best goalkeeper in the world. Last weekend he kept the Trotters at bay with a virtuoso performance.
But put him in a shirt with three lions on it and something terrible happens - as blunderous displays against the likes of Denmark and Austria will attest.
Likewise Ramprakash continues to score stacks of runs at county level, averaging over 100 in 2007, but despite being dropped from and restored to the England team about a dozen times, never did it at international level.
Both players have spent their careers on a see-saw, making an irrefutable case for their inclusion in the England team before stuffing it up and getting dropped, only to repeat the cycle over and over again like a broken washing machine.
There is a reason why James's 36 caps have been accumulated over the course of 11 years.
Early Doors does have a soft spot for James, who is one of the more intelligent and perceptive players around - despite bouts of blue hair and Playstation addiction - and suspects it is this thoughtfulness that proves his downfall.
Football is a simple game and it doesn't help to analyse things to much - after all, you wouldn't catch Wayne Rooney in a moment of introspection.
- - -
Rooney ran riot against at Old Trafford on Saturday as Arsenal collectively decided they couldn't really be bothered to win the FA Cup.
United went three up by the break and missed a hatful of other chances, provoking a familiar chorus from Alans Hansen and Shearer: "They should have had seven or eight."
What? It doesn't matter how dominant a side is, outside of the playground they are never 7-0 up at half-time. You can't just count the number of shots each team has had and decide that's what the scoreline ought to be.
Still, United had enough breathing space for Nani to enrage Arsenal with some superb showboating, as Justin Hoyte, Mathieu Flamini and William Gallas all narrowly failed to exact brutal retribution.
Arsene Wenger whinged: "We were incensed and most rightly so. It is difficult enough to swallow when you are three or four goals down - you do not want to be teased or humiliated."
Hold on, Arsene! Surely the humiliating thing is to be 4-0 down in the first place - what happens after that is largely irrelevant.
But Wenger's righteous fury was not burned out yet, as he lay the blame for his side's abject display where it belonged - with the pitch.
"The groundsman had as bad a day as us. You will see us in a different shape when we come back and a on different pitch. The pitch is a disgrace," he harrumphed.
Early Doors is looking forward to the day United buy Cruzeiro forward Kerlon, who last year sparked a storm of controversy with his 'seal dribble', which consists of running round while bouncing the ball on your head.
When the youngster tried it against Atletico Mineiro he got a shoulder-barge for his trouble and the following verdict from Atletico coach Emerson Leao: "It is a provocation. He may have to be sidelined for several years if he gets kicked in the face."
Even national team coach Dunga described Coelho's barge - for which he got a four-month ban - as "a normal challenge". And you thought Brazil was the home of the beautiful game.
- - -
Rafa Benitez should thank his lucky stars Liverpool's owners are so unpopular, otherwise he might already be out of a job.
The Spaniard was slated for leaving Fernando Torres and Steven Gerrard out of the team that lost at home to the excellent Barnsley, but this time the criticism was unjustified.
The blame lies not with Benitez (well, not directly at least) but with the stiffs who managed to chuck away a goal advantage in front of the Kop.
Every top team rotates their personnel when they play supposedly weaker opponents - the point is that the back-ups should be good enough to win.
Chelsea's Carlo Cudicini, Tal Ben Haim and Claudio Pizarro are just about good enough to see off lower-division opponents; Charles Itandje, Lucas Leiva and even Peter Crouch - the thinking man's flat-track bully - are not.
If you have to field your strongest side to see off a mid-table side from the division below you, you've got problems.
- - -
QUOTE OF THE WEEKEND: "I was that tired I thought I'd just kick it, and if it goes in the stand it'll waste time." Barnsley hero Brian Howard on the careful planning and execution of his stoppage-time winner.
FOREIGN VIEW: Milan are in a right pickle for their Champions League game against Arsenal after their first-choice keeper Dida hurt his back while sitting on the bench against Parma on Saturday. Zeljko Kalac is also injured, meaning a likely start on Wednesday for Valerio Fiori, who has played all of twice in an eight-year stint at the San Siro.
DEBATE OF THE DAY: Best player of the last 15 years? Count votes for Zinedine Zidane, Ruud Gullit, Carlton Palmer, Ronaldinho, Gary Penrice, Gabriel Batistuta, Eric Cantona, Titus Bramble and Stig Inge Byornebye.
And a gold star to kev_robinson1, who leapt all over Early Doors' assertion that it was 'a Gabriel Batistuta man': "And here was me thinking that Early Doors was non-gender specific."
In fact it can change its gender at will, much like a seahorse or, more prosaically, Paul O'Grady. Today Early Doors has decided to give Eurosport's lovely Portuguese cleaning staff a treat with fishnet stockings, kohl-rimmed peepers and a see-through bustiere.
Today's question: Should Liverpool sack Rafa Benitez and if so, who should replace him?
COMING UP: FA Cup draws might not have the mounting tension of those sprawling Champions League efforts, but they achieve much the same results. Join us for live coverage from Soho Square at 1.25pm sharp. Blink and you'll miss it...
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IM this storyWow now that was very interesting, I have to admit alot better than articles of late, alot more relevant to football, and the quote of the day was hilarious. As for Rafa, no, don't sack him, give him until the end of season and then decide from then
From tone.gunner on Mon Feb 18 09:20AMwell...its the end for benitez, probably get the sack at the end of the season...I bow to Manu...they are the best in England...I am a Chelsea fan but they the best
From omobobo on Mon Feb 18 09:22AMRonaldo da lima is still the greatest player of the last 15 years, Zidane is 2nd
From omobobo on Mon Feb 18 09:35AMshould give rafa at least until the end of the season... if get sacked, maybe can get mourinho
From sabo_tak on Mon Feb 18 09:39AMWow!
That was a very good read this morning - we actually discussed football! Thats more like it people! (not boys as were not gender specific!)
And as for benitez - let him stay till the end of the season, that will grant Everton, Villa or City 4th spot then replace him with.... WHO???From shaun8701 on Mon Feb 18 09:43AMSurely you cant be a Chelsea fan and still be bowing to Man U? lol. Thats like Birmingham City being top of the league and me saying "Im a Villa fan but they are the best" - not a chance hehe. Each to thier own i suppose
Naa dont sack rafa and his dodgy goatee - im in stitches everytime i see it, and besides, he's not that bad of a manager, the players need a kick up the back side as they are obviously overpriced and a collective load of rubbish.
I reckon FIFA should bring in a new rule too (not for Rafa but say the likes of Big Sam), a club should have to sign a new manager on the basis of a year. They cant swop and change then can they? Its a bit of a joke when a manager gets like 5 months to do the damage?!
From neo_booie on Mon Feb 18 09:44AMAs an Evertonian, I would love to see "Rafa Beneath-us" stay on as manager, as that means Liverpool will never win the league (we loved Graeme Souness for the same reason), something they once considered to be their divine right and were bloody obnoxious about it in the process. I still can't believe even now that they turned over Milan in the Champs League final, but they've not had a sniff in the league and even lost out to Everton for CL qualification and may do the same this year too! Beaneath-us gets a lot of support and sympathy because of the club's comical owners, but if you look critically at his record and the vast amount of money he has spent on sometimes astonishingly average players (even some Liverpool fans say that) and then compare him with someone like David Moyes who has considerably less money to spend but seemingly a lot more acumen (the James Beattie deal excluded!) and an ability to inspire his players to improbable heights, does Beneath-us really deserve any sympathy? If nothing else, he needs to leave Liverpool before he ends us speaking "English" like Jan Molby.....
As for Arsene Wenger, I am surprised that he "saw" the match in view of his track record of "not seeing" anything that relates to Arsenal breaking rules, being a bit @#$% or generally anything that makes them look bad.
From andywalker269 on Mon Feb 18 09:52AMBy the way, does anyone think that David James' disastrous beard makes him look spookily like Peter Sutcliffe, the "Yorkshire Ripper"? Or has Sutcliffe been out of jail for years and been playing goal under the name David James? It might explain some of his howlers over the years......?!
From andywalker269 on Mon Feb 18 09:56AMif teams could win the league on how likeable their manager was then Liverpool would win the league. But as we all know that this is the Premiership and not Big Brother, i'm afraid that Rafa will only have til the end of the season before he's 'evicted'. Liverpool must qualify for the CL at the very least and to be honest I just can't see them doing it.
Also, for all the stato's out there, can anyone tell me how many times this season that Rafa has said "Quality", "Confidence" and "Chances"?
From screamo_uk on Mon Feb 18 10:01AMPerhaps I`m the only person who doesn`t think that Nani was showboating ? At the time he was facing his own goal and under a huge amount of pressure from an Arsenal player. He was virtually right underneath it and the ball wouldn`t drop to his feet. In my opinion he kept possesion in the only way he could - and with superb skill. His treatment by some Arsenal players both before and after this incident just proves exactly how low they had sunk after being completely out-played from the kick-off.
From keith1120 on Mon Feb 18 10:12AMKeegan No Hope...
Messy-Aahh
From farah_shazana on Mon Feb 18 10:15AMI don't think they should bring a new rule in for incompetant bosses to hide behind,let them get it wrong if they can't judge what length of time a manager needs to do the buiss,then this will irritate the fans more and hopefully get to the real problem; people with loads of money buying brilliant football clubs, then trying to run them like it was a game of monopoly.
From geoffleechy on Mon Feb 18 10:15AMrafa hasn't spent very much at all in terms of net spending - sure he spent 50 mill this year, but he brought in over 30mill sellin bellamy, luis garcia, cisse, gonzalez, and sissoko.
either way, trophies or not, theres only so long you can get away with long ball counter-football at anfield. it didnt work for houllier and it won't for benitez. Give us marco van basten, PLEASE
From dselby_mail on Mon Feb 18 10:15AMif your reading, marco (and of course u are) - jib Holland off and come to Anfield. PLEASE.
From dselby_mail on Mon Feb 18 10:27AMDselby - net spending? I am not an authority on Liverpool's transfer history, but didn't Beneath-us sign all of the players you have listed? Would I be right in guessing that he sold them for a loss? Everton were interested in Sissoko, and I am so glad he went to Liverpool!
From andywalker269 on Mon Feb 18 10:30AMAll opposing fans to Liverpool should hope Benitez stays in his job because in the domestic league and cups he just doesn't have a clue
From j.herbert709 on Mon Feb 18 11:15AMLiverpool should sack Rafa Benitez and Big Sam should replace him. Big Sam says he wants to coach a big club and he should not be much crappier than Rafa and maybe a english coach will win Premier League one again!
From lollpardik on Mon Feb 18 11:22AMi think benitez shud resign not bcoz of the shocking results of late, but the lack of support n understanding from the owners. its very hard for him to work on as there's a rift between them. he shud leave liverpool n join another top club in the summer, probably barca.
From chengyeow85 on Mon Feb 18 11:47AMLiverpool OH No..DO not to blame the owners. Who leads the team during practice? Who leads the team onto the pitch at game time? Who leads the team in the changing room? Who picks the 11 players for each game? Who is responsible for the results? Who is responsible for the failure to breakdown opponents weakness? Beneathnuts, apparently he plays a different game in his head. He is the leader of Liverpool. Clean up the changing room problems. Select the right players consistently. Rip some notes from the top flight coaches play book. Is he dedicated, somewhat.Should he be fired, YES at the end of the season. The fams behaviour of buying the team does not help Beneathnuts. Should they fire him if they takeover YES.
From santos_rockers on Mon Feb 18 11:55AMwell said andywalker269, thats what i was about to say. he also signed n sold them within about a season and bought in players of less quality. I'll give him credit for torres but he only went for him cause he's spanish. I thought he was gonna fail cause came off yhe back of 2 average seasons. I read someone say Benitez would win most likable manager. WHAT?? I hate him, all he does is moan constant and some of it is just a disgrace! He suits liverpool though i guess, boring!
From sav46e on Mon Feb 18 12:09PMI hope Rafa has a job for life at Liverwho, personally i think he's doing a fantastic job and long may it continue. He may get thier application for the Intertoto cup entered soon before Villa pip them to that too. Blue IS the colour.
From lou_cypher2001 on Mon Feb 18 12:14PMA much better read than Friday's barely football related tripe.
From joseph_brownett on Mon Feb 18 12:27PMRafa has done more than enough for liverpool... what do they expect him to do? win the premiership!!!!!common guys!!! liverpool is a team of the sixties!!!! Why wont managers accept defeat graciously--Wenger has to blame the pitch!!!!I am not a prophet but Arsenal wont win any trophy this season!!! Who wants to bet?
ChuxzzyFrom clpnig on Mon Feb 18 12:45PMSack Rafa?!? - yeah go on then, and then get Big Sam in, he'll sign Big Tit Bramble to shore up that lower league defence and probably coax Tomas Brolin out of self-inflicted retirement to partner Torres up front.
Leave the bloke alone - he's a good manager - and leave Torres alone too, otherwise I'll set my dog on you.
Whatever happened to Jan Kromkamp?!?
And I want a "worst signing" competitiion - my vote is Jean-Alain Boumsong to (and quickly away from) Newcastle...
From chrismye on Mon Feb 18 01:06PMLeave Rafa alone, guys!!! How many managers in EPL are capable of winning champion league? There's only 2 - Fergie & Rafa. Fergie won it in 1999 and is trying to get a 2nd one ever since. Let us give our support to Rafa and he will not let liv fans wait that long.
From normgoh on Mon Feb 18 01:47PMsack rafa doesnt know how to play the english game
From jonesa_31 on Mon Feb 18 01:54PMI hope DIC takes charge in Liverpool, the American owners have just proven what we already knew; Americans doesn't really have a clue what football is. I also think they should give Rafa another chance. Managers who stay in the same team for a long time are the most succesfull (no comments about them staying a long time because they already are succesfull please). Take Arsenal and Arsène Wenger, or maybe Norwegian champions Brann and their coach Mons Ivar Mjelde as an example. Maybe he just needs time to "complete his masterplan".
From g_tande on Mon Feb 18 02:28PMI hope DIC takes charge in Liverpool, the American owners have just proven what we already knew; Americans doesn't really have a clue what football is. I also think they should give Rafa another chance. Managers who stay in the same team for a long time are the most succesfull (no comments about them staying a long time because they already are succesfull please). Take Arsenal and Arsène Wenger, or maybe Norwegian champions Brann and their coach Mons Ivar Mjelde as an example. Maybe he just needs time to "complete his masterplan".
From g_tande on Mon Feb 18 02:29PMRafa needs to stay at least till the end of the season...Hoping that City can get into europe (CL would be a bit of a bonus...but ill take a eufa cup slot).
Nani plays a bit of fancy foorball and people are complaining!!! Isnt that exactly what people pay money to see (even if it was a scum player).
Have you ever heard Gergle, Wenger, Rafa say that they were fairly beaten...the other team outplayed us and deserved to win....naa me neither.
From asxtc on Mon Feb 18 02:43PMyes
From johnmurfie on Mon Feb 18 03:30PM
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