Early Doors - Your morning briefing blog

Defending the Drog

Tue Oct 21 08:59AM

Didier Drogba faces one of those ubiquitous FA probes over comments made in his autobiography over his red card in the Champions League final.

Drogba was sent off late in extra time for a girly little slap on Nemanja Vidic, and said that he ought to have gone the whole hog and clocked the Serb seeing as he was going to get his marching orders anyway.

He wrote: "I have seen the match on video and I believe I should not have been sent off with three minutes to go.

"If I had punched him, I would have understood. Now I wish I had."

If that shows anything, it is admirable restraint on Drogba's part. He wanted to punch Vidic, but he didn't.

Instead he faces a fine, or at the very least a ticking off, for an incredibly tame comment.

Incidentally, Vidic responded by attempting to rip out Drogba's throat with his bare hands and had to be restrained by half a dozen team-mates.

But because the Serb's controversial public remarks only stretch as far as the fact that it rains a lot in Manchester, he is OK.

Compare what Drogba said to Roy Keane's tale of revenge on Alf Inge Haaland, which had to be toned down in later editions.

"I'd waited long enough. I f****** hit him hard. The ball was there (I think). Take that you ****.

"And don't ever stand over me again sneering about fake injuries. And tell your pal [David] Wetherall there's some for him as well. I didn't wait for Mr Elleray to show the red card. I turned and walked to the dressing room."

Next to that, Drogba's 'I wish I had punched him but didn't' seems even more tame. Nice of Keane to afford the referee appropriate respect, though.

But it is clear the era of interesting football books is long gone.

Wayne Rooney's autobiography, while well written (by Hunter Davies, not Rooney), was unremittingly dull because the lad had nothing to say.

Yet remarkably he found himself on the wrong end of libel action after having a go at Everton manager David Moyes.

Similarly, Ashley Cole's honesty about his contract dispute with Arsenal has made him one of the most hated people in Britain (number six, in fact - between Heather Mills and Gary Glitter).

People think footballers who speak in platitudes are idiots, but the opposite is true. Why else do you think David Beckham still enjoys near-universal popularity?

One of the reasons footballers have become so detached from the fans is that they so rarely say anything interesting - and when they do, everybody (ED included) leaps all over them, ensuring they never repeat the crime of speaking their mind.

The FA need to introduce a rule - something along the lines of diplomatic immunity - that allows players one book in which they can say absolutely anything, and nobody is allowed to give them any stick about it.

Disappointingly, it seems the one man whose book Early Doors would pay good money to read won't put pen to paper just yet.

Step forward Mr Joseph Barton: "England did nothing in that World Cup, so why were they bringing books out? 'We got beat in the quarter-finals. I played like s***. Here's my book'."

- - -

Proof that Tottenham really are a joke - today's Guardian devotes three quarters of a page to 25 Tottenham-related rib-ticklers.

Early Doors's three favourites are as follows:

1- Juande Ramos, shortly after another training session, comments to the head groundsman at White Hart Lane how impressive the pitch is looking. "It ought to," replies the groundsman. "We put 70 million quid's worth of manure on it every week."

2- I met this really kinky girl last night. 'Humiliate me,' she said ... So I bought her a Tottenham shirt.

3- What's the difference between Juande Ramos and a cowboy? A cowboy wears Spurs on his boots whereas Ramos is a crap manager.

ED was intrigued to see that Spurs fans have pledged to protest against the club's plight this weekend.

They will call for the removal of the chairman, the sporting director, the manager and quite possibly the tea lady, who always forgets that Gus Poyet has two sugars and just a splash of semi-skimmed.

If the protest is anything like as successful as Daniel Levy's pledge to qualify for the Champions League, then the suits have nothing to fear.

The fans will spend the whole week banging on about their ambition to make this one of the greatest fan protests in the world, before the whole thing descends into chaos by quarter past three.

- - -

QUOTE OF THE DAY: Gordon Strachan laments his dwarfish Celtic side ahead of the trip to face Manchester United:"We've been hit by injuries in important areas and we're actually trying to sign Snow White to lead my players out at Old Trafford. It's not just Ferdinand and Vidic. You've got Fletcher who's a giant, Berbatov, Ronaldo can leap, John O'Shea is big. They've got pace, power, height, ability, determination. I don't know if any of my players have that - and I'm not being cheeky."

FOREIGN VIEW: Corriere dello Sport reckons that Big Fat Ronaldo is in talks with Serie A minnows Siena. Nobody else wants him - and this video tells you how sad that is.

COMING UP: It's Manchester United v Celtic, Fenerbahce v Arsenal and six more in the Champions League. We've got live, minute-by-minute coverage of it all. And don't forget the Zenit St Petersburg v BATE Borisov blockbuster is an early kickoff - 17:30 UK time.

Comments1 - 30 of 580
First
Previous
1
2
3
4
Next
Last

First in the ED League 1
From g_hine on Tue Oct 21 09:05AM
Report abuse
First!!!!!
From kgh_r on Tue Oct 21 09:05AM
Report abuse
No!!!! GHine Noooooo!!!! If it wasn't for those damn exclamanation points!!!!!!
From kgh_r on Tue Oct 21 09:06AM
Report abuse
"between Heather Mills and Gary Glitter" surely the worst place ever!
From sikka316 on Tue Oct 21 09:08AM
Report abuse
Ler-hoo-ser-her!!!!
From g_hine on Tue Oct 21 09:08AM
Report abuse
last
From jarharnamme on Tue Oct 21 09:09AM
Report abuse
Nowhere near first. I blame false advertising. Even after using 'stimulating' shower gel and 'intense rush' toothpaste I'm still half asleep. Who do I sue?
From danny_saks on Tue Oct 21 09:14AM
Report abuse
Drogba's first instinct was to slap. Lot of talent but a girlie. Much the same as Ronaldo. Though that is is tough on women. No insult intended. They tend to just get on with the game. Where does that leave these two prima madonna's?
Alongside Bentley who is without the talent?
From dubstyler on Tue Oct 21 09:15AM
Report abuse
Now now Ghine, don't you know that pride is an abomination. One must forego the self to attain total spiritual creaminess, and avoid the chewy chunks of degradation.
From kgh_r on Tue Oct 21 09:19AM
Report abuse
A Tottenham season ticket holder was so disraught that he nailed his ticket to a tree outside White Hart Lane. The following day he changed his mind and returned to find that some one had nicked the nail!
When Mourino was asked to take on the Managers job at Newcastle he replied "I'm not that F*&%$#G special"
That should upset a few of you!
From geelte on Tue Oct 21 09:19AM
Report abuse
Morning everyone...that was a very pleasant read this morning.]
A Joey Barton autobiography. i think he should call it - HOW NOT TO SMOKE A CIGAR AND 15 WAYS OF ASSAULTING PEOPLE.
#4 - Yeah being between Gary Glitter and Heather Mills can't be very nice at all.
Drogba has point even if i do not like him. But sticking up for Vidic if a little twerp came up to me and slapped me like he did, i'll be baying for his blood. Or i would go and nick his hair oil because how would he cope without his greasy locks!!
SPRINGBREAK WWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
From johnnyevz on Tue Oct 21 09:27AM
Report abuse
danny_saks - you should be careful with that 'stimulating' shower gel you don't want the effects of viagra now do u!
I'd sue the toothpaste company.
From johnnyevz on Tue Oct 21 09:29AM
Report abuse
Morning Johnny thanks for last night I have neverpissed myself sooo much thank Fallout & Dropout and especially Loco I was crying with laughter - and I really loved SPRINGBREAK WWWWOOOOOOOOOO!!! it clears the Americans out every time. Thanks again best laugh ever
From anne_helm on Tue Oct 21 09:30AM
Report abuse
Bring on that chunky degradation then... I am not particularly spiritual, therefore, self-gratification (and herein, I do not refer to onanism) is good
From g_hine on Tue Oct 21 09:32AM
Report abuse
Tell you what johnny - what you REALLY don't wanna do is get that tea tree and mint shampoo mixed up with the shower gel and slap it on yer bits. Cos that's just not pleasant. Unless you're into that kinda thing of course. But thanks for the advice...
From danny_saks on Tue Oct 21 09:34AM
Report abuse
Anyone else see the @#$% here???
Drogba gets sent off for slapping a Man United player...
Says in a book he didnt even write that he wished he has punched him and these morons defend that???
These are the nobs who were having a dig at Tevez...
Listen up cack breath...
Chelsea lost the Prem...
Chelsea lost the final of Champions League...
Dont like it???
Tough...
Live with it...
Drogba is worse than Ronaldo (the slim one) for diving, cheating and being a big shirt lifter...
Now kindly fk off and take up knitting...
Nuff said...
Report me???
You think I give a @#$%???
GLORY GLORY MAN UTD...
Champions of England, Champions of Europe...
From buzzchatonline on Tue Oct 21 09:37AM
Report abuse
I personally wish the Drog would have not only decked that racist vidic, he should have bloodied his nose and kicked out some of his teeth. That would have been some real action to behold. Football is a passionate sport you know. Even girls when playing the game do get into real bloody tangles. The FA should back off.
Ifez.
From emekaifez on Tue Oct 21 09:39AM
Report abuse
whatever let the law do its cause!!!!!!!!
From strictken on Tue Oct 21 09:42AM
Report abuse
#13 - lol, Morning sweetie
Glad you enjoyed yourself last night, and your welcome to come into our party anytime. Loco is a crazy mo fo and makes me laugh all night. But i apologise for if anything was said out of order for a woman
I do the SPRINKBREAK WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO because i try to make the Amercicans see how idiotic they are!!
If your tear ducts and bladder can endure another night we will probably be on tonight sometime.
From johnnyevz on Tue Oct 21 09:42AM
Report abuse
#15 - nah i don't think i'd like to try that. it puts a new concept to the word tea bag.
No problem on the advice, i'm hear all week. Anyone else got a problem and would like an honest answer then just ask away.
Where's my little @#$% jlo this morning??
From johnnyevz on Tue Oct 21 09:46AM
Report abuse
Hi ho silver lining!
From mickr273 on Tue Oct 21 09:53AM
Report abuse
Drogba very arrogant player. It's end of his career and he will not secced any further in football.
From the_simple_mind on Tue Oct 21 09:53AM
Report abuse
Hello Mick, where've you been hiding to
From johnnyevz on Tue Oct 21 09:56AM
Report abuse
hi johnny. Very busy at work last few days. lots of paperwork to get through still!
And dont you dare doubt me Doubt-it-Man!
From mickr273 on Tue Oct 21 10:05AM
Report abuse
#20 - Well its tingly on yer head so imagine what its like on ... no, on the other hand - don't! So whats this then - 'Ask Johnny' week? OK then. Dear Johnny - I honestly believe the Owls can achieve the play-offs this year. Am I deluded?
From danny_saks on Tue Oct 21 10:06AM
Report abuse
Why does Drogba do this every now and again, just when you think the diving and controversial comments have all been gone and forgotten, he comes out with another gem. Personally I don't think the insight into his thoughts are that bad, but still, he must no he's going into dangerous territory speaking out like that barely 5 months after that game. When you actually break down what he said, "If I had punched him," 'IF', thats okay Drog, thats purely hypothetical...... "I would have understood." well thats alright too Didier, wisdom and hindsight surely isn't a bad thing hey, so let's finish it there....... 'Now I wish I had."..........D'oh...!!!
From molloykristian on Tue Oct 21 10:08AM
Report abuse
Alri Mick. Happy with result last night? Not a mention from ED even though it was the only match last night and the Drogba thing is not interesting at all! A lot of debate about the penalty / red card.
From kgh_r on Tue Oct 21 10:09AM
Report abuse
hey who has the most out of the early door leagues?? im in league3 in 1st place with 674. anybody around 800??
From colinhillphoto on Tue Oct 21 10:11AM
Report abuse
Dear Johnny what are better, pirates or ninjas??
From sikka316 on Tue Oct 21 10:13AM
Report abuse
666 - number of the bast #1 in ED1
From g_hine on Tue Oct 21 10:14AM
Report abuse