History repeating
Mon Jun 09 08:57AM
Fans of historical re-enactments would have seen echoes of the past in the way Germany repeatedly stormed their way through a crumbling Polish defence yesterday, particularly with a bloke called Fritz on the right wing.
Group B at Euro 2008 also features Austria and Croatia, meaning you can almost drive from one end of the group to the other, with only 20-odd pesky miles of Slovenia preventing that dream from becoming a reality.
It is, to put it mildly, a section with a lot of history. Had the Second World War gone the other way, it would only have two teams in it. In fact, England might have had half a chance of qualifying.
England's failure was meant to be good news for the fashion police as well as the riot police.
Instead of beer-bellied, tattooed oiks festooned in St George's crosses, we were meant to get suave, stylishly-dressed Eurofans accessorising their tastefully logo-ed Croatia shirt with a Prada bag.
As it turns out, these foreigners aren't so very different. They like their beer warm, flat and in a flimsy plastic cup. They get drunk on trains at seven in the morning, and they take over unsuspecting town centres with their unique brand of nationalistic 'banter'.
Fifty Germans were arrested in Klagenfurt for chanting anti-semitic, holocaust-related slogans at the Poles, including: "All Poles should have to wear yellow stars."
While Early Döorß hopes the morons get the shoeing they so richly deserve, it has no doubt that, had the same fans been English, they would have been accusing their hosts of lacking a sense of humour, like the ones who claimed it was a basic human right to make Nazi salutes in Nuremberg two years ago.
- - -
With nearly 50 Premier League players featuring at the tournament, the English confidently predicted that even if our players are rubbish, the ones playing in our league would prove that the Premier League is the best in the world.
Our national pride has been reduced to supporting foreign players bought by the foreign money of our clubs' foreign owners - it is a little sad, especially in view of the fact that Premier League players haven't even done anything.
The weekend's goals were not knocked in by the likes of Ballack, Ronaldo or Kranjcar - instead supposed no-hopers like Sverkos, Meireles and Podolski did the business.
No Premier League player has found the net yet. Tottenham-bound Luka Modric doesn't count, by the way. He was able to complete 90 minutes without injuring a thigh, groin, knee or ankle, thereby proving that he is not yet true Spurs material.
Early Döorß was intrigued to see Justin Timberlake playing golf at the US Open course, just about managing to break 100.
Such celebrity involvement might help to spruce up the slightly lukewarm goings-on. Who would you rather see playing for Austria - Juergen Saeumel and Ronald Gercaliu or DJ Ötzi and Arnold Schwarzenegger?
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The Three Lions might not be at Euro 2008, but Rio Ferdinand has wasted no time in picking up another title.
The Manchester United skipper was in Nigeria promoting education through football, only to be whisked off to a ceremony where he was accorded the title 'Chief Fiwagboola' by King Akiolu, who was clad in an old United shirt.
Ferdinand appeared in traditional dress, which included headgear that looked like it was made out of a Laura Ashley napkin.
Fiwagboola means 'character maketh wealth', which in Rio's case is certainly true; an irritating tendency to 'merk' his team-mates with practical jokes maketh £120 grand a week.
Last summer, Rio popped up in Uganda, where he was driven through crowds of adoring fans in a motorcade, waving regally at his public.
On that occasion he lapped up the attention but this time Ferdinand had the good grace to feel slightly uncomfortable about it all.
"I'm a little embarrassed to be named a Chief, I'm not sure I'm worthy," he said.
"It's something to tell the lads. I'm sure they'll be very happy to call me Chief."
Or maybe not. Remember Paul Ince's attempt to force his team-mates to call him The Guv'nor? Needless to say, Incey it remained.
- - -
QUOTES OF THE WEEKEND:
5 June - Cristiano Ronaldo: "I want to play for Real Madrid, but only if it is true they are eager to pay me and Manchester United what they have been saying they will. It is important to send a message. From now on I will not talk again about this until the end of the Euros. It is not worth asking me because I will not reply."
6 June - Luiz Felipe Scolari: "Cristiano will tell you this every time you ask him - don't waste your questions anymore."
7 June - Cristiano Ronaldo: "I haven't decided yet about my future. I'll only do that after the European Championships are over. I don't want to talk about this again until the competition is over."
THEN DON'T TALK ABOUT IT!!!!!!
Early Doors is about three Ronaldo statements away from taking out a loan for £80 million and funding the transfer itself.
FOREIGN VIEW: German scandal sheet Bild's headlines are better than its stories, so how about these two: "Jawollski, Jogi!" and "Podolski putzt die Polski".
TALKING POINT: What do you think of it so far? Does the absence on home nations denude Austria versus Croatia of that tiny shred of significance, or are you just happy the WAGs aren't around?
COMING UP: This is the day Euro 2008 gets serious. The match that France coach says cold throw his side "into the lake" is coming up. Les Bleus take on Romania at 5pm. Then at 7.45pm the Netherlands take on Italy in what should be a belter.
SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION: Join the burgeoning Early Doors group on Facebook. Go on...
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IM this storyprobably not the first post, but it says there arn't any yet, we'll see!!
From andyc147 on Mon Jun 09 08:59AMdid anyone else notice how @#$% off Frings was when he was given poor balls in the box? I reckon he had a bet on himself to score!!
From andyc147 on Mon Jun 09 09:02AMIt's good to see that Euro Döorß is staying true to it's continental form! Not bothering to turn up to work on Saturday even though it was the opening day of the tournament!!
From freeandrewdickson on Mon Jun 09 09:07AMI, for one, am glad of the absence of the home nations. It means that my bets are not misguided by misplaced British loyalty. Austria to win? I like those odss...
From matt_smith2002uk on Mon Jun 09 09:15AMPoland should try using Robert Kubica,he might add some pace to the team....
From wesleybell88 on Mon Jun 09 09:35AMShould Joey Barton go on a tour of Africa (unlikely given the family history) what would his adoptive name be? "Big Chief Beat on Little Kids" "Big Little Angry Man" or "Big Chief You Starting on Me?"
From dougbororobson on Mon Jun 09 09:47AManyone who saw Croatia v Austria should probably feel that it should have been at least a draw, Pogatetz should have been send off (gave a slap on Olic's head when already on a yellow card, the reaction proably convinced my compatriot Vink (the ref) to let it go!) and that Vastic should have started. anone agree?
From sebsterel on Mon Jun 09 09:54AMim saying it again germany for the cup!!!! podolski was on fire last nite and the germans thoroughly killed poland
From dannickbates on Mon Jun 09 10:00AMI'm already looking forward to see how the British pundits will pronounce the name "Jô" (Ho).
From g_tande on Mon Jun 09 10:06AMIs Fi WAG boola an activity? What's Drogba's african title Dives In Box.
From philbutler on Mon Jun 09 10:07AMFine effort today ED. Based on style, am I right in guessing you non-gender-specific persons also do the transfer gossip page on Yahoo/Eurosport? Rio Ferdinand "I'm a little embarrassed to be named a Chief, I'm not sure I'm worthy." Well Rio, since you are not sure, let me help you. You are not worthy! Since Nigeria is synonymous with bribery, corruption and fraud, maybe the title is suggesting that Rio has become rich due to these less than admirable qualities.... well, he is certainly guilty of forgetfulness about drug testing anyway. Such subtleties would be lost on him though I imagine. Honorary title for Joey Barton - Big Chief Anger Management, or Chief Punch First Think Later. And Cashley Cole...Chief Where Is My Cheque, Chief 50k Is An Insult, or Chief Gorgeous Missus At Home But Still Inexplicably Chases Slappers?
From andywalker269 on Mon Jun 09 10:11AMShameful! Club football teams get penalised when this stuff happens...maybe Germany should get a 3 point deduction??
From at_mich on Mon Jun 09 10:12AMi thought Poland were unlucky they had sone good chances...... if only that Podolski fella was Polish.............
From legendofjericho on Mon Jun 09 10:37AMdat woman above is wasting posts...well all i hv to say is ITALIA all the way...and Ronaldo will leave Manu @#$% August and win the Euro and World footballer of the year with it....not winning it with Real Madrid...dat means alot to dem than actually having the player...lokk at Ronaldo, Zidane, Canavaro, Figo...Ronaldo C. is next
From omobobo on Mon Jun 09 10:49AMoh God Yahoo please do something about the spammers that are all over your site!! I am getting sick of having to having to trawl through these stupid spam adverts for dating sites every time I look at the comments section for any of your sports web pages!
From andywalker269 on Mon Jun 09 10:54AMOk seriously woman 4rm england n newyork stop wasting posts...we talking footie ere not sex!!!!
From watsupiyke on Mon Jun 09 10:57AMJust because we have time to read and comment on ED doesn't mean we are all sad and lonely people in need of a dating service! I guess it's just a coincidence that I am, anyone here fancy a bit of football related how's your father.
From sikka316 on Mon Jun 09 11:03AMOk you got me, I just wanted to see the phrases "how's your father" on ED
From sikka316 on Mon Jun 09 11:04AMif we had more west ham players in the england squad,we would have been there...we won the world cup with them and would have won euro2008..
irons for ever
From bazzadoni1 on Mon Jun 09 11:06AMEURO 2008 finally gets underway tonight.. come on crazy dutch bast%^ds!!
i liikkkkeeeeeee gooooooooolllllddddichs a keeper!!
From damdesign66 on Mon Jun 09 11:14AMmake me sick ...west ham? please
From dannickbates on Mon Jun 09 11:14AMgood morning dannick, r we firends again? x
From damdesign66 on Mon Jun 09 11:18AMSee the way Croatia struggled against Austria? And WE couldn't beat them! England are THE embarrassment to the football world.
From eliotot on Mon Jun 09 11:18AMfirends are internet buddies who set fire to one another using the power of love
From damdesign66 on Mon Jun 09 11:19AMWe could try and see how many sex related phrases or words we can use in a football context.
'Ronaldo was awarded a penalty after a bit of slap and tickle in the box'...oooh errr...
'That's got to be a free kick, you can;t take a man from behind like that so roughly and not get penal-ised'
From ckmosc on Mon Jun 09 11:22AMHhhm, Rob Green in goal, Anton Ferdinand and Matt Upson at centre back, Lee Bowyer, Kieron Dyer, Mark Noble and Scott Parker in midfield, and Bobby Zamora and Dean Ashton up front. Just need a couple of full backs from elsewhere. It's amazing that Steve McClaren, genius that he is, didn't spot the possibilities........ Now, returning to the real world.....
From andywalker269 on Mon Jun 09 11:27AMWhy is no one chasing Podolski to move to the premiere league?? Seems slightly odd to me. Looks like he can do the hows your father if you ask me....
From tontonsky on Mon Jun 09 11:57AMWell, sounds good in theory, but we'd never have 11 men available to take the field, with most squad members in the training room receiving treatment on one ligament or the other.
From manutd_mainactor on Mon Jun 09 11:57AMMy predictions for the Euros were Sapin n Germany and my feelings of players to do well are Gomez and also Ibrahimovic for sum reson. just have feeling he might finally play well.
I want Chelsea to sign, Ribery and Guero, I know they wont get him but Id like it. Maybe another striker if Drogba gos as Sheva and Anelka aint young, although they bought a guy in January who's young so should give him a chance n have Sahar who has potential.need to go 4-4-2 for Ribery but.
From sav46e on Mon Jun 09 12:12PMi just knew you'd find some way to rubbish spurs again, modric's never had the shirt on yet and you could wait til the tounament's over to stick it in again, still at least we got a mention
From roxydgurl on Mon Jun 09 12:23PM
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