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Posts by "Bert Merris"

  • Bert Merris

    Re: cdn blonde

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Sep 22, 2010 01:48 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Aahhh Lovely Stuff! It would appear you forgot yourself "Mikhail/Malice".... ...

    Aahhh Lovely Stuff!

    It would appear you forgot yourself "Mikhail/Malice"....


    You answered the OP while still in Character!

    What a Faux Pas!

    Kind Regards, Bert Merris

  • Bert Merris

    Disgusting Stuff! Tenerife Beheading!

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . May 14, 2011 03:13 . Permalink

    How Singularly Repulsive! A man has killed and beheaded a British woman in a supermarket...

    How Singularly Repulsive!


    A man has killed and beheaded a British woman in a supermarket on the Spanish holiday island of Tenerife.

    The man attacked the unnamed 60-year-old woman in a Chinese supermarket in the resort town of Los Cristianos, Arona, severing her neck with a knife and then rushing on to the street carrying the head.

    Passersby and security guards tried to stop him and he was eventually caught after an Italian man on a motorbike knocked him to the ground by hurling a helmet at him. The man tripped over and fell to the ground, with his pursuers managing to restrain him until police arrived.

    The alleged killer is an unemployed Bulgarian apparently well known in the town and occasionally given to loudly proclaiming himself to be God on earth. The 28-year-old man lives in the town.

    Spain's state news agency, EFE, quoted police sources as saying that the victim was a 60-year-old British woman who had been shopping in the supermarket about 10.30am local time. Her name has not been released.

    Colin Kirby, a reporter for Tenerifemagazine.com, saw the aftermath of the attack.

    "I didn't see the attack but I saw the guy," he said. "It was unreal. I was walking past the commercial centre and I saw a small group of people outside. There was a guy from the medical centre going down the ramp and I thought perhaps someone had fainted.

    "I heard people shouting and screaming and making a commotion and there was this guy and he was holding a head in his hand. He was holding it by the hair, there was blood on it. I thought it was a theatrical head, guy playing a practical joke. There was nothing in his other hand, no weapon or anything.

    "The man was in his late 20s … he was a bit dishevelled, unwashed, he was wearing a jumper and trousers, when everyone else is wearing shorts. Even at 10.30 in the morning, it's boiling."

    Kirby said that the man ran off after a group of people chased after him but he was tackled by a security guard.

    "There were people coming after him and he started running. A security guard tried to tackle him and he ran but then the security guard managed to restrain him:

    DIsgusting Stuff!

    Kind Regards, Bert 'Cuffy' Merris (at your service)

  • Bert Merris

    Re: Does anybody know..............................

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Jul 16, 2009 01:06 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Aaah, a quite superb thread with a wonderfully refreshing subject matter... The sudden di...

    Aaah, a quite superb thread with a wonderfully refreshing subject matter...

    The sudden disappearance of Butch.


    Can it be that the Australian Police have finally been alerted to
    this Maniac's Maggotry?

    Oh I do hope so!

    Kind Regards, Bert.

  • Bert Merris

    Re: BUY, BUY, AMERICAN PIE

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Feb 13, 2010 06:13 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Aaahh Lovely Stuff! Thank you Marquis for this post and for the multitude of mellifluous ...

    Aaahh Lovely Stuff!

    Thank you Marquis for this post and for the multitude of mellifluous messages and myriad magnitudes of mind-altering magnificences that have majestically and magically mesmerised the minds of millions and miraculously meliorated my moods!

    All Hail The Marquis!

    Kind Regards, Bert "Cuffy" Merris (at your service)

  • Bert Merris

    Re: DEDICATED TO BERT MERRIS & DEREK MARTLETT

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Feb 6, 2010 04:23 . Permalink . Go to topic

    AAhhhhh!! Quite Superb!! Mrs Merris thought that clip was sublime. Indeed it took me ba...

    AAhhhhh!! Quite Superb!!

    Mrs Merris thought that clip was sublime.

    Indeed it took me back to the days when I too

    was not averse to the occasional shuffle!

    Once I'd pulled the curtains of course!

    Kind Regards, Bert 'Cuffy' Merris (At your service)

  • Bert Merris

    Re: Is Dignitas Killing For Cash?

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Jul 16, 2009 01:42 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Wonderfully considered responses from some of my favourites on this most difficult of issu...

    Wonderfully considered responses from some of my favourites
    on this most difficult of issues.

    And a super point from Roy that we do not allow the unnecessary suffering of animals, so why indeed must we suffer when our short lease nears it's end.

    I think a suitable denouement for a life well lived would be
    a buxom and completely nude call girl on each knee ( assuming they could take the weight) and a pipe containing a gargantuan rock of crack cocaine guaranteed to propel one off into the next world in an
    industrial strength, cataclysmic orgasm of the ages!

    Apologies if this jars with a previous post, Naturally in this event the substances would be prescriptive.

    Kind Regards, Bert Merries (at your service)

  • Bert Merris

    Re: Racist Reasten Link

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Aug 12, 2009 05:40 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Ahhh Disgusting Stuff Mr Tickle... Thank you for the warning! Kind Regards, Bert Merris ...

    Ahhh Disgusting Stuff Mr Tickle...

    Thank you for the warning!

    Kind Regards, Bert Merris (at your service)

  • Bert Merris

    Re: Is this Racism?

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Jun 14, 2010 00:13 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Aaahh, Disgusting Stuff! How dare you sign off using Derek's designation! You houseb...

    Aaahh, Disgusting Stuff!

    How dare you sign off using Derek's designation!

    You housebound hick!

    Kind Regards, Bert "Cuffy" Merries (at your service)

  • Bert Merris

    Re: A good one..

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Oct 11, 2009 02:24 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Lovely Stuff! How wonderful to see you in such fine form Mr Kipps! Knowing that you sti...

    Lovely Stuff!

    How wonderful to see you in such fine form Mr Kipps!

    Knowing that you still post is a fine incentive to visit more often!

    Kind Regards, Bert 'Cuffy' Merris (at your service)

  • Bert Merris

    Re: Normal service to be resumed?

    Bert Merris by Bert Merris . Jun 20, 2010 02:04 . Permalink . Go to topic

    Aahhh Lovely Stuff! By sheer coincidence, my weekly visit to the board uncovers a real ...

    Aahhh Lovely Stuff!

    By sheer coincidence, my weekly visit to the board uncovers a

    real gem of a post by keyword!

    And what an incisive post it is, pointing out the undeniable

    link between a visit to the board from Ian Robert Harris and

    the resultant foul backwash that suddenly appears in his wake.


    Disgusting Stuff!

    Kind Regards, Bert "Cuffy" Merris (At your service)

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