Cow Corner

  • Left-armer leaves KP in a spin

    Kevin Pietersen was already planning which angle his sponsors would like to see his bat raised at and whether his helmet had messed up his Brylcreemed hair, when left-arm spinner Shakib Al Hasan got his 'bunny'.

    Pietersen was well set on 64 in glorious sunshine and on a flat deck against an innocuous bowling attack minus its quickest bowler, when he succumbed to the Bangladesh skipper for the fourth time this year.

    KP was not merely dismissed, he was humbled, outfoxed, and done like the proverbial kipper as he danced down the wicket as if emulating a heavily sequinned Darren Gough, only to see

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  • Tamim ton leaves the purists purring

    What is there left to say about Tamim Iqbal that has not already been said? Well, everything as it happens, but the 21-year-old's blistering ton at Lord's should boost his lowly profile somewhat.

    It took the hugely excitable opener just 94 balls to plunder 15 fours and two sixes in truly exhilarating fashion as England's four-man attack toiled like a well fed Angus Fraser bowling on a road in Antigua.

    When Jimmy Anderson, Timmy Bresnan, Graeme Swann and Finn tell their grandkids about their cricketing exploits, they may well be braced for the swift riposte: 'Yes, but you were mullered around

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  • The win is Finn the bag

    After half a day of changing room cricket and Ian Bell-related banter due to incessant rain, England still managed to slay four Tigers with a stunning spell from Steven Finn setting up the win.

    A dreary bout of rain ensured that the England players were cooped up in the dressing room with their extensive backroom staff leaving little space for kit bags, let alone Tim Bresnan's brunch.

    Graham Gooch was left to show anyone even remotely interested the ideal tempo at which to perform a bicep curl with a kettle bell, while David Saker regaled everyone with rather galling stories of nights out with

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  • Booger fills his boots

    Jonathan Trott, who appeared to bat with a damp, dud Harrow bat in South Africa, grabbed a new, oiled short-handle and roared back with an unerring 175 to dispel any question of him carrying the isotonics.

    Trott, who is affectionately known to his mates as 'Booger', went through many different guises on day one at Lord's as he lurched from a free-flowing Denis Compton impersonation on a flat deck, to spells of desperately drab circumspection a la Chris Tavare on a pudding pitch.

    From the moment Graham Gooch handed Eoin Morgan his first England cap without a flicker of a smile and an uplifting

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  • Tireless Trott Lord’s it up

    The wicket was left in a shambolic state, with the umpires thoroughly peeved at providing a leg-stump guard every three deliveries, but Jonathan Trott finished with 226 runs to his name after an epic vigil at the crease.

    ECB chairman Giles Clarke, himself no stranger to digging up dirt, would have been secretly impressed as he was summoned out to inspect the craters created by 'Booger' with Aussie match referee Alan Hurst, but the umpires were less than taken with his questionable crease conduct.

    The last time an England batsman scored 200 at Lord's was back in 2004 when the cherry-cheeked

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  • Colossal Mr Cricket tees up dream final

    The final everyone had been talking about looked, at one point, as unlikely as Saeed Ajmal taking a catch, but thanks to Mike 'Mr Cricket' Hussey, the showpiece match will see England take on the old enemy Australia.

    If there is one man who lives, drinks (well, not in the Jesse Ryder sense of the word) and sleeps cricket it is 'the Huss', who sprints out to the middle and reads chapters of Allan Border's autobiography at every rain break while re-knocking in his old bats.

    Shahid Afridi's side had one foot in the final before the sunblock-plastered left-hander bulldozed a belligerent 60 off

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  • England swagger and strut in St Lucia

    You could be forgiven for thinking Paul Collingwood's England resembled West Indies circa 1985 as they swaggered, strolled, strutted and smashed their way into the World Twenty20 final, and all with a smug smile that said 'you may as well give us that trophy now'.

    England fans have a predilection for suspecting that a Calypso Collapso may not be too far off, but it doesn't take a body language expert to judge that the current crop have about as much self-belief as Clive Lloyd's domineering band of destroyers, and that's not including Ravi 'have you seen my cover drive?' Bopara.

    Andy Flower may

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  • Doff your Black Caps towards Bresnan

    Eoin Morgan's breezy 40 will attract the plaudits from the purists, but it was another breathtakingly nonchalant display from Timmy Bresnan which saw England swagger through to the semi-finals in St Lucia.

    The understated Yorkshireman, whose concept of celebrating a wicket is walking briskly back to his mark with his head bowed, bookended the New Zealand innings with all the accuracy of a ball machine, then promptly smashed the winning runs with a dutiful look before tucking his bat neatly under his arm and departing the scene.

    Sharing a dressing-room with the likes of Kevin Pietersen and

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  • England clinch series with thumping win

    England clinch the NatWest Series in style with another dominant performance; Patel and Flintoff were the star men today - and the future looks bright for this one-day side. Thanks for joining me this afternoon; make sure you stick around for all the latest news! 

    South Africa 170 (42.3 overs) ALL OUT! Patel becomes the first England spinner to take five wickets since 2002 as Ntini edges through to Prior! England win by 126 runs! 

    South Africa 170-9 (42.1 overs): PATEL IS GOING TO REMEMBER TODAY! The spinner gets himself a fourth wicket, although it is a little fortunate...Botha goes back to

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  • Little Weed hits back

    And now over to Jimmy Lennon Jr. "In the red corner, weighing in at 158 lbs, out of Jalandhar is Harbhajan "the H-Bomb" Singhhhhhhhhhhhh".

    The latest unedifying spectacle to hit international cricket came on Friday as Harbhajan gave India team-mate Sreesanth what the late Mike Reid would have described as a "dry slap" after an IPL game.

    Sreesanth should consider himself lucky that he didn't get a nut in the sternum after Mahendra Dhoni compared the row to the one between Zinedine Zidane and Marco Materazzi in the last World Cup final.

    Whatever contact was made - apparently one of the

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