This is Cow Corner coming through strong on channel 19. Do you Roger, cottonpickers? We got a brake-check going on in the B-Town. Seems we got a dead pedal commin' back off the hammer, must be some Smokey Bears takin' pictures up there. This is Cowers, backing out. Over.
Cowers has donned its big red trucker cap, sunglasses, lumberjack shirt and yellow braces in homage to England's go-slow at Edgbaston yesterday, New Zealand robbed of victory when the umpires called a halt in the gloom and rain just one over before a positive result would have been achieved.
As cynical and spineless as England's go-slow was, at least it was successful - which is more than you can say for the British truckers' recent attempts at reducing fuel costs with their own demonstrations down the M4 and M6.
Cowers can't help but think that the truckers might have been more successful in their protest had they not chose motorways that resemble cark-parks at least-congested of times.
Worcestershire's Graeme Hick will break the record for the number of games played in senior cricket when Somerset Sabres visit New Road today - his 1,196th match.
The 42-year-old told local radio good fortune had played a part in his settling in Worcestershire after arriving in 1984 from Zimbabwe (which he left to further his cricket career, not because Robert Mugabe had nicked his farm).
"I've been very lucky as Worcester was a place I didn't come to out of choice," he told BBC Hereford & Worcester.
Thankfully, Hicky found the town more to his liking than Charles II did in 1651.
QUOTE OF THE DAY: "The IPL was only four overs a game and it was like a paid holiday; you only had to work hard if you felt like it, which is probably why we finished second-last." Bangalore Challengers' Dale Styne, talking himself out of next year's contract in the IPL.
TALKING POINT: Graeme Hick: flat-track bully, or flawed genius?
COMING UP: More Twenty20 Cup action from around the Shires.