World of Sport

“The devil with a set of t**s”

World of Sport

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"The
devil with a set of tits." - South African striker Benni McCarthy's verdict on Karren Brady, following the West Ham
chief executive's comments in April calling him "a big fat mistake".

"Nice of him. But Benni, I'm meant to have tits, you aren't!" Brady responds in a newspaper column on Saturday.

"I
need to know that in everything I do I am being at my most effective... It's
making all the difference." - Britain's top tennis player Andy Murray reveals the new dietary
regime that he hopes will propel him to Grand Slam glory. 24 hours later he was
dumped out of the Montreal Masters in his opening match.

"This
act shames me in front of my mother, my wife and each and every one of the women
in my family and my country." - Colombia coach Hernan Dario Gomez offers an apology after punching a woman in the
face, twice, after an argument in a bar. He resigned two days later.

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"I
don't have a crystal ball and I'm not Harry Potter!" - Roma's new Luis Enrique gives a pithy refusal to
offer a prediction of how his side will do this season. Is it wrong of us to know
that divination was actually Harry's worst subject at Hogwarts, worse even than
the dreaded potions lessons with Professor Snape?

"You
don't do F1 for fun. In the end, he has to ask himself, 'Can I do it or not?' I
honestly don't think it will work out for Michael now; when you want to go
quicker, you try everything -- and when you've tried everything and you still
don't make it, that's it." - Formula One legend Niki Lauda urges Michael Schumacher to admit that he can no longer
cut it, and quit the sport.

"He is
a good player but he is a dangerous player because sometimes you could end up
playing 10 v 11. He might get sent off." - England boss Fabio Capello reveals why he has no
intention of picking Joey Barton any time soon.

"On
the plus side at least Capello knows who I am, I was beginning to think I was
the invisible man." - the newly tranquil Joey Barton responds to Capello's comments. If Barton thinks if he
could ever be invisible then he must be crazier than we'd thought!

"It's
the last Major of the year and I've got six or seven months to the Masters, so
I might as well try and play through the pain and get it over and done
with." - After hurting his wrist during the opening round of the US PGA
Championship, Rory McIlroy shows beyond
all doubt that his career focus is on one thing: winning Majors.

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Premier League - Spurs the only game off
"There
is nothing worse than being left behind at the start of the season." - Harry Redknapp's assessment of the
situation after Tottenham's match against Everton was the only Premier League
clash postponed due to the rioting. Possibly some of the people who've had
homes and businesses torched by gangs of lawless thugs might be able to suggest
one or two things that are a tad worse than a football match being put off for
a week or two.

"Arsenal
admit defeat in battle to keep Fabregas and Nasri" - the headline that ran
in just about every newspaper in Britain this week about the Arsenal transfer sagas. Just a few
weeks ago, Gunners manager Arsene Wenger felt very differently: "I believe
for us it is important the message we give out. For example, you talk about
Fabregas leaving, Nasri leaving. If you give that message out, you cannot
pretend you are a big club, because a big club first of all holds onto its big
players and gives a message out to all the other big clubs that they just
cannot come in and take away from you."

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"We
talk about trying to make 'daddy hundreds', and I think I have managed to do
that with my last few. The daddy phrase is from Goochie, he doesn't really
count anything under 150." - Alastair
Cook
reveals that England batting coach Graham Gooch has been urging his charges
to believe that a mere century is no longer good enough in Test cricket.

"It's downhill, but it ain't that much f****** downhill." - Open champion Darren Clarke gives his assessment of the brutal, 260-yard par-3 15th at Atlanta Athletic Club, site of the US PGA Championship, which is played over a lake to a small, raised green.

"People
say 'how can you not enjoy playing football?' But it's like someone who feels
they are in a dead-end job and dreads going into the office every day." - New QPR signing Jay Bothroyd
reveals that ennui and existential angst are just as much a problem for
footballers as for the rest of us.

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