• Manchester United Message Board

  • A Yahoo! User Jul 30, 2007 22:37 Flag

    10 reasons why football is bad for your health

     

    1/ You start to idolise Wayne Rooney and in an attempt to be like your hero go and sleep with an old lady with questionable health standards and an unsanitary bed.
    2/You start to idolise Sir Alex Ferguson and in an attempt to be like your hero you drink five bottles of scotch a night to try and grow your own bulbous nose(note my nose is impervious to the copious amounts of alcohol I consume because I rule, you suck, see my earlier thread).
    3/You start to worry that you are not girly enough to be a Mankie and decide to opt for the sex change op (note I having nothing personal against transexuals, I hate everyone) which goes horribly wrong leaving you ruined for life.
    4/In an effort to get closer to your team you move up north. Statistics show that your life expectancy gets less the further north you live. Stay in Surrey, on 2nd thoughts, don't.
    5/You follow your team abroad to a champions league away game. During a conversation where you try to enlighten an enraged Milan fan that Man Utd is the best team ever, he stabs you. Whilst not necessarily a bad thing, you probably won't like this very much.
    6/You wake up and realise that you suck and I rule, the depression this causes leads you to take your own life. Sad but at least you are helping to ease the population crisis.

    In fact all of you do this and save me the bother of enlightening you further, good luck, see you on the otherside.

    I was'nt joking, go on, end it now.
    5/

    This topic is deleted.
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    • I think you will have to illustrate where I was made to look like a twat. I'm just not seeing it.

      I am however seeing a lot of evidence that illustrates I am indeed the best person on this message board.

      Maybe you need to reread the thread? Or maybe you need an eye test?

    • Just flicking back through the history books as it were.

      Thought I'd give myself a slap on the back for keeping so many morons happy in this thread. You lot really should thank me.

      Just be grateful that the more time people like Mr Philips spend in my threads the less time they are clogging up your message board with their inane drivel.

    • Sam, why do you have multiple ID's??

    • Still biting I see! Not very bright are you! PML

    • Who gives a crap what you hate! Your biting like a kippa PML!

    • 'Hook! Line! and SINKER my old chum! Ya biting like a kippa!.'

      Hmmmmm. Not very bright are you?

    • Hook! Line! and SINKER my old chum! Ya biting like a kippa!.

    • PML! I got another bite..hahahahaha

      Thanks for your crap answer to the bait!

      'HA! HA! HA! Awww poor malcolm_glazer_super_fan's clutching at straws to try and wind me up. Ain't gonna happen! you know why? Cos, your biting at the threads like a! Now whats the phrase fishy_fishy uses? Ohh yes! "LIKE A GOOD FISHY FISHY"!

      Ps MY TEAM DIDN"T PLAY LAST NIGHT! (Snigger) oops better get your foot seen to right away! You know the one! The one thats stuck firmly in your mouth;0.'

      As explained elsewhere what exactly am I supposed to be biting? This is a thread on an internet message board, there is nothing to bite. If you mean continually replying to your drivel then I agree that it is a tad foolish and that I could spend my time more constructively in 'The Greatest Thread on the Web'. However I think you should remember my little fan that you are replying in a thread that I started, I would therefore put forward that it is you who is being made to look a bit of a muppet.

      I assumed that all Manchester Utd fans were arrogant enough to believe that United were their team. Just for you, how did the team you support get on against Inter Milan the other night?

      Until you learn to type properly I see no further point in discussing anything further with you. Should you wish to type a well worded reply then you may get a response.

      Or you could just report this message and get it removed like so many other quality posts by me appear to have been. Go run to mummy.

    • PML! I got another bite..hahahahaha

      Thanks for your crap answer to the bait!

      HA! HA! HA! Awww poor malcolm_glazer_super_fan's clutching at straws to try and wind me up. Ain't gonna happen! you know why? Cos, your biting at the threads like a! Now whats the phrase fishy_fishy uses? Ohh yes! "LIKE A GOOD FISHY FISHY"!

      Ps MY TEAM DIDN"T PLAY LAST NIGHT! (Snigger) oops better get your foot seen to right away! You know the one! The one thats stuck firmly in your mouth;0.

    • Sam, do you let mummy fight all your battles for you? PML? Do you know how much I hate your little abbreviations?

      Your life must be so dull. Mummy, mummy the big boys posted something I did'nt like. Thankyou for nicely illustrating my point about why I hate mankies. How did your team get on against Inter Milan last night? Did they steal your ball? Aw diddums. If you ask mummy I am sure she can sort those nasty Inter boys out for you.

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