I have a great offer for you today, in fact a steal. We are offering you the chance to purchase what can only be descibed as a 'world class' striker.
STEALTH abilities, yes this player can dissppear within the blink of an eye during any match, confusing all opposition players around him.
GREAT ACTING ABILITIES: no idea where he trained but this player can fool the opposition into believing he isnt playing for his team. Amazing as it sounds but by stading around not interacting with team mates or chasing the ball this player can disguise him self as a lamp post.
Ambition: enough said!
Oh and did I mention when in the mood this player can create some of the best football to watch and can be instrumental in any win. Only thats when scouts are probably watching him from the sidelines.
Well how much you may be asking for this gem of a player well my friends we have a special offer this week, and for this week only. This player is at the great price of:
99p yes 99p
Subject to terms and conditions that include you do not work for Manure utd as this offer is not valid and the player will be at the standard price of 38million pounds sterling.