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  • One day a Jew, a Hindu, and a Man United fan all arrived at their hotel to find that there had been a mix-up with the bookings, and that there was only one room left for them to share. The manager explained that this room only had two beds, but that there was a barn at a neighbouring farm which the farmer, an old friend of his, would let one of them sleep in free of charge. They complained a bit, but since there was nowhere else to go, the Jew graciously said he'd sleep in the barn. The Hindu and the United fan were just settling down to sleep in their room, when there was a knock on the
    door. It was the Jew. "I'm sorry," he said, "but there's a pig in that barn and because I'm Jewish I feel uncomfortable about sharing the barn with it."

    "No problem," said the Hindu. "I'll sleep out there instead." So off he went to the barn, leaving the United fan and the Jew to share the room. They were just settling down to sleep, when there was a knock on the door. It was the Hindu. "I'm sorry," he said, "but there's a cow in that barn and because
    I'm a Hindu I feel uncomfortable about sharing the barn with it."

    The United fan grudgingly agreed to give up his bed and stomped off to the barn, leaving the Jew and the Hindu to share the room. The Jew and the Hindu were just settling down to sleep, when there was a knock on the door. It was the cow and the pig.

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    • Sent
      Thanks
      Ed

    • Ed send me an email with his name, I'm sure my father knows him

    • This is really funny Alan! - Even I can see the other side of that.

      Ed, Lorraine did mention something about visiting relatives in Bristol. She should be back soon.

    • Prostitute shouts to a scouser outside Anfield, " hey scouser-- fancy a blow job"

      Scouser replies " F*** Off I dont want any sort of job"

    • One day an Arsenal, a Man Utd. and a Liverpool fan decided to put their differences behind them and discuss the merits of their teams in civilized manner down the local pub. After several hours of discussion and drinking they decide to leave the establishment and make their way to the exit. As they push each other through the doorway one of them knocks over a bottle. WHOOSSHH - A genie suddenly appears and says "I have been trapped inside this bottle for 200 years, now I will grant you all one wish in thanks for your deed" The arsenal fan considers for a moment and says "I want to be back at Highbury and see Tony Adams lift the Premier trophy again". Moments later his wish is granted and he is back at a packed Highbury at end of season watching his team walk away with the title. The Man Utd fan says "I want the Premiership trophy back at Old Trafford and a huge wall erected around Manchester to keep outsiders out and the trophy inside." Moments later the scum fan finds himself back in the grotty surroundings of Salford and a huge wall is erected around the City. The Liverpool fan considers for a short while and says "Tell me about this wall, Genie ?" "well" says the Genie, "It's 50 foot high, 20 feet wide and nothing can get over, around or through it" The Liverpool fan replies "Oh well in that case fill the fucker with water"